Veni,Vidi,Vetti

Rue in the loo

2011-11-20T11:21:00.001-08:00

An MBA perspective of B-school hostel bathrooms

Maybe, the 3 million of the future managers will be able to relate to what I write here. The 3 million who aspired and were eventually driven away to hostels to share the ‘exotic’ rooms will be able to. Bathrooms were the least worry then, it is the morning ritual now.

There is something about the bathrooms of the hostel that no other place can teach. Honestly, JK Rowling should have written her books in there. The intriguing half white scarred tiles empowered with cobwebs in every corner you notice, you might as well be inspired like the King Bruce who learnt from the spider.

Applying the S.W.O.T. (Strength, weakness, opportunity and threat) analysis to the four walled, tri-partitioned area, we can arrive at the following :

(a) Strength : A place for meet over and exchange of pleasantries

(b) Weakness: The strength of the place is misused

(d) Threat: By Murphy’s law, it is never available when you need to use it.

This place can teach you more than necessary:

(a) Patience and calculation: Place your bucket in front of the door and wait for your turn . More than the virtue, it instigates you to calculate the probability of the person coming out that door as compared to the next one.

(b) The social network: Introduce, interact and associate to the gossips of the haven.

(c) Estimates: Understand the usage patterns of others, estimate the resources and time utilized, reduce competition by seizing opportunities.

(d) Competition: Observe what the competitors do and use. Be a leader in a peculiar habit/ usage or be a quick follower. Go for a defensive strategy when the a product you think is your is lying next to the wash basin but someone else claims for it.

(e) Full utilization of your senses: Capture the sounds and smells. Stay alert to dart outdoors.

(f) Management crisis : Run on the tap for hours together in anticipation of hot water, forget to carry the soap into the bathroom, three people queued before the door are all crisis that needs tactics to solve. Make long term strategies.

(g) Time management: These teach you time management like no other.

The BCG (bathroom consulting group) :

Star

Hot water

Question mark?

Individual bathrooms?

Cash cow

Shower usage

Dog

Dustbins. Bathrooms never have dustbins!

Hostel bathrooms are mini discotheques; people rush in like mad, play music for whatever reason, sing aloud and leave in a happy hurried mode.

Bathrooms have their own business cycles too:

The normal usage is at peak but during exams, the usage is nearly zero. Bathrooms experience recession during exam time.

CSR activities:

The only CSR activity that can be practiced is to use the bathroom for what it is meant for. Also, keeping the "environment" clean gets you the ISO standard.

Thus, the conclusion that can be drawn is that bathroom problem still remain, at large, unattainable. The college doesn’t care. The students don’t care either!

Words, an obsession

2011-11-13T10:41:00.000-08:00

Flattery among the unnoticed clutters,

Magnanimous altered from the simple things,

Volume echoed from a shrivelled voice,

Words, o wonderful words ! What else is better than you?

The flow that captures the moment that never lasted,

Drills in accordance with every human emotion,

Laugh, cry, smile and wonder,

Words, o wonderful words ! Can a face do any justice as you do?

When in solitude, I hear you stronger,

When you string with your kind, I feel you,

Speak of volumes that man had created,

Words, o wonderful words ! Utter the tales that I never lived to see.

Present through sands of time,

Living my life as it were borrowed and lent,

Passed through aeons of timeless experience,

Words, o wonderful words ! You complete me, my beloved companion.

When wrecks occur in believed blissful life,

I set out to search the right sequence,

Embed in my mind, heart and lips for ever,

Words, o wonderful words ! Violent wars are imbibed by you in history.

Form of expression never recognised,

Silent whispers like tears in a lover’s eye,

Pacifier and purifier of doubts, anger and pride,

Words, o wonderful words ! Where do you not exist?

Creating magic and language among human life,

Preserving the most sacred relations in dying times,

An angel to every brotherhood and sorority kind,

Words, o wonderful words ! Wed you, shall I?

Digging deep the grave

2011-09-19T19:21:00.000-07:00

Ohmy! Did you not know the way back?

Workof art remains here though,

Didyou not notice what may have left behind?

Itdoesn’t seem to hurt me anymore.

Bloodmay bleed, so may it clot

Tearsmay dwell, so may the heart rot,

Yourhappiness is embalmed in my curse,

Forthat every word you had uttered.

Dieo love! Die in the faith you never had,

Cryin the tears of loss and suffer,

Celebratethe victory that was never yours,

Prayfor the sins that were committed.

Iam not your God, I am not another vain,

Iam not your love,I am your pain,

Conceitto the world your peaceful thoughts,

Andshake in pain deep within,

Doesit hurt to see me happy?

Thatwas much intended, oh,you blind?

Letit scar on your mind and heart,

Likethat of burnt lips from fag.

Letit spread the misery of heaviness,

Likethat of the fragrance of flower.

Letthe flesh burn raw and crude,

Letthe heart cry out loud in hell.

Ask not what are the reasons to hate,

Pebbles in the shore of river are never rare,

Choke with sadness for all that matters,

Like the smoke in you that was not let out.

Whenyou thought that everything was over,

Thatvery moment was the beginning,

Forthe mistake you made this time,

Carrythe burden for generations to come.

Fag end of life

2011-08-29T12:24:00.000-07:00

Cigarette. The most intriguing commodity I have ever witnessed. It seizes the holder in minutes of madness and claims a power that is inexplicable. Still, he lingers on to it and succumbs. He does not get judgmental in the moments of its companionship and this character makes him vulnerable.

He is lost in its unexplained charm which confuses him of what he thinks of it. He enjoys it in his boredom, failure, thoughts and pleasure. He does not know what he wants nor understands what he gains when it is placed between his fingers.

Irony it may be, but analogies can be drawn from every aspect of life. Are not decisions like the cigarettes?

When two paths unfold and you choose one of them, does that mean a choice? As human of rational thoughts, we would say a yes. But, is there a choice in everything that we foresee and forgo? If the answer is yes again, then decisions make us vulnerable and the hard hitting facts makes us understand that there is more to what we had assumed or known.

Decisions make us succumb to the best of alternatives that has been drawn out of the experiences we accumulated. We make them all the time. We think, confuse ourselves and hold on to what we believe is the best.

I am of opinion that all decisions are of evaluative in nature only after it has been occurred. Just like the cigarettes, you cant be judgmental while acting upon the decision. You have to fall into its confusion and unpredictable nature on the go before understanding the full implication.

What makes a decision right or wrong? Maybe, it is only the outcome that can tell. Till then, you will have to enjoy it in the moments of boredom, failure, thoughts and pleasure. You will have to let yourself indulge in hope and wait in despair for the results you wanted to know.

Decisions can make you addictive like the commodity as it can force you into thinking about it all the time. It is like the nag at the back of the head that appears at times when you need it the least.

When the ashes of the cigarette burn out, would you not be tempted to go into the same dilemma again? Decisions are exactly like that. We make them too often enough to notice. We fall into the same repetitive cycle of ever lasting dilemma.

Except that, decisions don’t burn out like ashes. They stay to make scars.

Roll of a die

2011-07-22T11:00:00.000-07:00

In chaotic state of doubt and desire,

When every materialistic and subjective things matter the most,

Bring it closer to your vulnerable heart,

And understand the rhythmic beat that you own.

Being merely prudent is a delusion,

Because there is no relative perfection,

Attain what you must,

For no one shares your own regret.

Don’t believe the folks when they utter,

That grey shades do occur in life,

Black and white is the choice,

And in all circumstances, choice was present.

Destiny moulds as you go,

Fate unfolds when least expected,

But can’t you do something to the withering flower,

That has been placed in your hands.

Thrust forward to run the mile if need be,

Plough the impossible grounds if you want to,

Break the barriers with nonchalant might,

Live the life in your own boundary less right.

Journey that has been cast may seem blurred,

Or easily attainable in companionship,

Whatever be the reason,

Even shadow refuses to follow you in the dark.

Why waste life on things you didn’t want,

Or things that were unattainable,

Why risk for things that were never meant to be yours,

Is running behind the pot of gold under a rainbow considered wise?

Same thoughts, why not fight for what you want?

Give the chance a chance in random,

Move the time in reasons of faith and hope,

And never give up for that one reason you wanted the most.

Miracles are made to occur,

Battles are avenged to fight,

Sometimes, let heart do the talking,

Things that the mind never has to know.

Don’t turn back to see the steps taken,

Deeds are never to be justified,

Sprint forward towards the dark unknown,

No one lied when they said life happens only once.

Cribber's diary

2011-06-28T19:20:00.000-07:00

Amongst the darkest and most annoying phases, this maybe a cynical post but I deserve one. Everyone does. I pass phases just like every other person, except that I realize and think about it too much. Memory is a bi- emotion; it helps you at one time and gives you a headache the other time.

Here are my entries in the diary I would love to lose.

I regret..

(1)Not doing the best of ability: Cliché? But it is true. I often wonder what makes one passionate and other, not. There were things that were planned and laid ahead with so much careful calculations but in implementation, everything was lost. Academics, relationships and even, capitalizing on the strengths. I was methodical and never learnt to break free. I am sure nothing is lost but I wish I had tried more and better rather than letting everything take over me. This regret, I am still working on.

(2)Not loving my family as much as I should have: This is very true. I have never let them know how important they are. I never wanted to be known as an emotional individual and chose to be independent. Now, let us not imagine a girl with no love or affection. It is just a feeling that I should have carried out more than what I have ever done.

(3)Letting things go at the end: I have not been very persistent about many things. Too much thinking and too little confidence. It would be nice if I had a bowl of optimism that I could drink from every day. Little things did annoy and little things did exhilarate me. I wish I worked till the end without any confusion and with more clarity.

(3)Letting people hurt me: It is entirely my fault that I chose to go around wrong people and ended up getting hurt. I hate being naïve and thought of being so either. If given the super powers, I would love to dwindle all the time I wasted on those people. If given the chance and guts, I would love to hurt them back. I am not being cruel. What goes round comes back.

(4)Not learning to sing: Music has never amazed me and I, till date have not been able to find out why. It doesn’t make me lose myself nor does it bring any happiness. Music, to me is just another sound; pleasant and not pleasant. But, I love the words that are strung together with the music. Because of this one sole reason, I wish I had learnt to sing.

(5)Not calling my friends: This is a common complaint that I don’t call anyone without a reason. I am sorry. It is laziness that encapsulates my consideration. I promise to call.

(6)Not capitalizing my strength and leaving the weakness: I did exactly the opposite and ended up putting the eggs in too many baskets. Though, it is not my regret, I hope to be more careful in future.

(7)Not saving enough money: Guess this is self explanatory.

(8)Not eating less: Apparently being a part of the fair gender, there are some traits that need to be prominent. To me, beauty and health takes a backseat when food comes into the picture.

(9)Not being able to market myself: I cant laugh loud or throw couple of swear words that every boy in the corridor would notice. I cant say things I did and emphasize on my contribution. I cant let others know what I can do. In simple terms, I cant market myself.

The list seems endless and it does send me to a state of utmost depression. It imbibes a feeling of inferiority and makes me seem insignificant. But, do I do anything about it apart from cribbing? That is another most important weakness.

If God rested

2011-06-12T08:21:00.001-07:00

12^th December, 2012, 15: 45 p.m.

He waited for her over the big monitor that has been his only partner for past few decades.

In less than few seconds, she appeared.

“Are you sure?”, he asked in subtle voice that ensured no fear and coveted reply.

“Absolutely”, she replied.

“Dextera Domini”, he said in his breathe and almost a mumble.

“Means the right hand of God. If they work out their plan and execute accordingly, rest assured that the entire world would be convinced”. She emphasized on the ‘entire world’.

“Can it be done scientifically? Bring darkness over light?”, he asked for the thousandth time.

She knew he had something in mind and would stress on a question until he was satisfied. It was her duty to give him the information.

“It pertains to the fundamentals of quantum physics. Light and darkness are mere illusions of mind. Light and darkness are part of the same spectrum with different names. Darkness just consists of wavelengths of various radio, microwave, infrared, ultraviolet, X-ray and gamma rays. If they are emitted in the right quantities, they constitute the darkness”.

“So, it is possible”, he asked again.

“Yes, it is”, she answered again. This time frustration emerged in the conversation. She hid her face behind the 4-D signals monitor. The signal indicated the urgency of the message.

“What is the ultimate motive?”, he questioned. This time he at least seemed to take the conversation further.

“Chaos”. Her one word reply.

“Chaos?”, he asked genuinely perplexed.

“Chaos is the pivot of confusion, untrustworthy, doubts, fear and tends to set human to extreme measures. It makes sure that no one depends on the system. And by this, no one bothers about norms and there is no setting in the society. It is like an epidemic break”, she explained satisfied by her own understanding.

“So, it cant be stopped. People will stop believing in the system and us. There would be murders and suicides.”, he added to her explanation.

“Not just murders, but genocides. People will think that killing is their right. It would involve another survival of the fittest. Dextera Domini believe they are sent by God to destroy everything. Just like the Ark of Noah”, she explained to indicate the seriousness.

“This must be stopped”, he claimed.

She felt this was the first time he said something wise. She didn’t reply to him. She remained calm and allowed him to think.

“How did they convince that the world would end?”, he asked.

‘Questions again’, she thought. “Sir, the means of communication is much more complex and far reaching”, she almost smirked in reply.

“No. How did they say that the world would end?”, he asked more clearly.

“They said that the earth would rotate the opposite direction. This indicates that the places that have sun would become dark and vice versa. This would be followed by cyclones and any other factors that might exist in this phenomena”, she uttered clearly.

“Which simply indicates that they would induce darkness and light at appropriate places and chaos would follow”, he nodded in reply.

“Where are their reactors placed?”, he asked the final question.

She gave him six combinations of longitudes and latitudes. “You will have to destroy every of them before their operation begins. Good luck Sir”. With these words she disappeared.

He called the operator and gave the instructions.

12^th December ,2012, 23: 53 p.m.

He was sure of their system and perfect execution of commands. More than three fourth of his officers were sent to do the job. There were instant five calls assuring him that the reactors have been taken care of. The sixth reactor, bigger and rumoured to be set on first was still not destroyed.

He was waiting for that one call. A success call that assured him a promotion and the world to look up to their organization. One call that might restore faith in human race.

The communicator blinked.

“Yes?”, he asked.

“We destroyed the all the reactors”, the voice spoke.

“Brilliant !” , he claimed.

“I am not very sure , Sir", voice lowered not in secrecy but in pain.

“What do you mean?”, he screamed.

"There has been spilling. We can see darkness flow right before our eyes.It seems that the reactors continue to function even after being hit.”, voice panicked.“The operation continues because the reactors cannot be destroyed by mere weapons. It was all programmed. We should have hit the source code.”, voice explained.

He slumped into the chair. Everything seemed to fade before his eyes.

12^th December ,2012, 00:04 a.m.

Chaos was set out. Dextera Domini succeeded.

Then the clock ticked

2011-05-30T03:11:00.000-07:00

Three shadows that cast in the room seemed still. If a painter was brought in, he would have completed a painting without any hassle. The steam from the coffee mug seemed to blur one of men with spectacles. He grumbled, scratched his chin and removed his glasses. The other two didn’t even acknowledge each other’s presence.

The wood creaked every time they made slight movement. Many old dusty photo frames and medals were hung random on the walls. Being new to the job, Mr. Ruskin felt it was an odd and old fashioned place to enquire a criminal. Especially some one like Mr. Frussel.

“We thought we would never lay our hands on you”, said Mr. Merchin. He rubbed his glasses on his sweater sleeve.

Frussel didn’t say anything. It seemed of his nature not to speak more than what is needed of him. This was taught to him in twenty seven years with faith and fear of Lord Durne.

Ruskin smirked at the naivety of Merchin. It was just over a year when he joined the investigation bureau. To his knowledge , Merchin was with the enquiry department for past thirty four years but he handled only small petty suspects and criminals , so, this innocuous statement was not a surprise.

“Hope you wouldn’t bother me with questions about the whereabouts of Lord Durne”, said Frussel curtly.

“I was about to ask only that!” , squeaked Merchin in surprise. Ruskin rolled his eyes.

Frussel looked from Merchin to Ruskin. He felt it was strange that both didn’t act their age. The young man was silent and the old seemed to enjoy talking.

“I wish I knew”, he replied back.

Before Merchin could say anything, Ruskin spoke.

“You were the right hand of Lord Durne, what was your job?”

Frussel was slightly surprised and didn’t take efforts to conceal it.

“There was a hierarchy in the system. Lord Durne was careful not to involve just a person in any of the crimes that were committed. One person would not recognize the other even if they worked under him. I was responsible for conveying the messages from him to another”

Ruskin moved slightly forward, “How did he give instructions. Has he ever called over the phone? “

Frussel looked down at the table. “Usually it came in an envelope marked with a seal. It always contained the mark of Lord Durne. A red dove.”

“Red dove. That’s odd for a criminal like him”, said Merchin more to himself. He fiddled with his ring and glass but the other two ignored him completely.

“That was his daughter’s name , Dove. But she was raped by couple of drunken youngsters. The case didn’t even come to court.”

Ruskin rubbed his forehead with his fingers. “And who was assigned the task of killing?”

“I always delivered it to Orgy. That’s what everyone called him. So, I never knew who was assigned the work”, replied Frussel.

“Orgy? You mean the man who was killed last year?”, asked Merchin trying to butt into the conversation.

“Yes. It was him. There were rumours that Lord Durne killed him. He knew too much. Lord kept his men well but at the same time, wouldn’t wince a bit when they got too close or suspicious”, explained Frussel.

“You treat him like God. Have you seen Durne any time?”, asked Ruskin.

“He was our savior from poverty and miseries. No, I have never seen him. Not when I was conscious at least”

“What do you mean by that?”, asked Ruskin in a curious voice.

“I had a heart attack a year ago. He came to visit me at the hospital. I was dazed because of medicine and couldn’t see him well”, he looked down.

Ruskin collected all his thoughts and what Frussel had said. Lord Durne seemed to know what he was doing and was good at it. A man of his position was respected and feared.

“Remarkable guy”, he thought to himself.

Suddenly he saw Merchin staring into the coffee which he had sipped just a minute ago “Merchin, what happened?”

“It tastes weird”, he replied back.

There was ten seconds of silence.

“Don’t drink it!! Don’t drink!! It could be poisoned !!”, Ruskin screamed.

Merchin threw his mug on the table. It crashed sending echoes across the room. The other two picked their mugs to do the same. But, there were two gun shots.

The light in the room flickered. There was a strong coffee stench.

“Hello, headquarters?”

“Yes”, came the reply.

“There was a rift between a criminal and officers here at Bureau quarters and looks like they killed each other. Can you come immediately?”

“Shit! Who are you?”

He placed the receiver down and turned his ring on the right side which showed a red dove. He put on his hat and looked at the two dead bodies.In few hours, a third body would be discovered in the room. The body of the real Mr. Merchin.

“He knew too much”, he thought and left the place.

Yin Yang

2011-05-25T09:13:00.001-07:00

Un-real

(What I write. The heights of exaggeration)

The heat wafted over my skin. The world seemed to nod to the violent silences. I followed as it moved stealthily and in the same pace as if it knew where it was heading. The circles made my senses spin in its own direction. The mind flew in the other and everything ceased to shatter in every direction that was not right. I shut my eyes to the unreality or was I assuming so? I did not want to confirm my fears but had to open my eyes to succumb to the endless movement.

My body felt heavy and fulfilled. The repulsiveness to spring upon remained though. I could not move and one side of the torso was reluctant to obey the other side.

Loneliness made its grasp and choked upon me as it were my enemy. Even when it was the case, I embraced the lost friend and let him torture me. He continued till I began to find him pleasant.

I began collecting all my thoughts that were hidden away in black vague shadows. I drifted to the place I never wanted to be but had to go. That was the norm of the moment.

Real

(What actually happens)

It was a hot afternoon and I was lying on the bed looking up the fan. I was following the rotation of the wings till my eyes and head hurt. I kept doing this because of boredom and having nothing to do.

The lunch was very heavy that afternoon and I had ‘kattufied’ moru kozhambu and everything that makes you sleep and because of this, I was not even able to move my body.

I was very bored and nothing was helping me at the moment. This all led to the feeling of loneliness.

I began to dream and drifted away to sleep.

(And there you go :D)

Realm of reality

2011-05-20T00:09:00.000-07:00

Wise said beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder

Meandering that beauty make not exist in reality

It cannot be defined because it seems not permanent

But, defying that, I say beauty is permanent,

Or that is what it should have been.

Beauty, like every other instilling character, has passed through innumerable stages. It has been defined as external appearance and some other time, an internal embracement. Of all faults of men, this is one: to define beauty in the first place. It is the first nature of human to complicate things and most of the times, in contradictory to what should be made simple is made complex.

Beauty is such a thing in the ever unforgiving traits of generations. Two pairs of eyes see more than one and even more, interpret more than needed. If I say a particular thing is beautiful, would you agree with me? Beauty is opined according to every individual and let us keeps that distinct as it is. Let us give each the freedom to what he thinks is beautiful rather than allowing him to define it.

Shouldn’t beauty be last longing? Wars were fought, kingdoms were brought down and mythologies, histories were written. This might indicate beauty should have lasted long than few minutes of encounter or few hours of prejudice. If mistakes were made because of this very feeling, should it not be a part of seven deadly sins?

Is beauty a thing or a feeling hidden amongst the intricate gathering of emotions? Is it to be experienced or to be watched over carefully? I don’t understand the nature of it. Maybe it is one of the intriguing mysteries unraveled and better left that way.

Beauty is more invisible than air and even tasteless like water. It has no foundations to hold upon and stand for itself. In other words, beauty just looks out for a medium. It is like the salvation, free from something to get something else yet unknown. It is as dangerous as the unknown and as simple as a baby’s laugh.

Beauty can be omnipresent like God or be God Himself. After all, we did see God in many things. Didn't we?

Now, you ask me to define beauty.

A mother bears all pain to bring her child into this world. This is beauty.

A lover sacrifices everything to get her. This is beauty.

A soldier stands in between the divides and does not know for whom he is holding the gun. This is beauty.

A friend runs to help the other, come whatever may. This is beauty.

To put in simple words, beauty, to me, is the white light. It is sacrifice, pleasure, happiness, forgiveness, trust, care and everything that exist within God’s creation.

If there is anything that is going to make you content and show you the purpose of existence like a human being, it is beautiful.

Beauty is permanent.

P.S., This is a part of Dove along with Yahoo to promote beauty. Please vote for this write up here

Who am I?

2011-05-07T10:20:00.001-07:00

I am an Indian: Emotion is a weapon of defense and strategy
I am an Indian girl: I have been stereotyped
I am an Indian aspirant: USA still is a top priority
I am a south Indian girl: Most of sex knowledge comes from books
I am an Indian reader: I used to love Sidney Sheldon. For all wrong reasons.
I am an Indian Sportswoman: I played basket ball, not for passion but to increase height
I am an Indian B school student: Facebook is my breath
I am an Indian Electronics Engineer: I did everything except understanding electronics
I am an Indian daughter: I am a display doll in other marriages
I am an Indian sister: I am used for comparison
I am an Indian foodie: I look at the price before eating
I am an Indian movie buff: Regional language movies are for watching and English for discussing
I am an Indian educationalist: Speaking will get me anywhere
I am an Indian employee: The more I sit, harder I seem to work
I am an Indian spender: Food always seem taste better in roadside shops
I am an Indian consumer: I buy a dress from a big brand and look for an occasion
I am an Indian traveler: Bargaining with auto driver is my right!
I am an Indian counselor: I have an advice for anyone and everyone on the road
I am an Indian supporter: I would support both a cricketer and an activist even if they oppose each other
I am an Indian activist: To me, religion is a cause and an excuse
I am an Indian writer: I try my best to please others

Halogen killer

2011-05-02T09:59:00.000-07:00

How naïve can we be? How ignorant in spite of all the education? Only after IndiBlogger declared this contest, did I ever bother to look it up in google. And to my shock, there was not a single thing about the harmful effects in first few pages.

I remember the times I spent in the swimming pool when I was 13 years old. I was fascinated by the deep blue colour that resembled the beaches that were portrayed in the bollywood movies. In an attempt to do a back stroke just like those heroines in the movies, I ended up gulping in tons of water. The taste was just the opposite of the beautiful sight. The other senses were awakened too. The smell was as bad as the taste.

There are millions of hotel and commercial pools in our country. Each of them needs to be maintained to retain their customers. This is the reason chlorine is added into the pool.

With many people using the same pool every day, it is obvious that the pool collects various containments like lotions,dirt,oil etc.

To clean this, chlorine is added to the pool.

Most pools contain both good chlorine and bad chlorine. The good chlorine is called free chlorine and is capable of killing germs. Bad chlorine, on the other hand, is called "combined chlorine" and is a poor germ killer.

Too much combined chlorine in your pool causes the strong chlorine odor. When the combined chlorine level reaches 0.2 ppm or more, it is time to shock your water. Shocking will eliminate the odor.

Routine shock treatment is necessary to destroy combined chlorine compounds and restore the chlorine sanitizer to "free chlorine" efficiency. A pool can be shock treated by adding large doses of chlorine, commonly referred to as superchlorination, or by adding a non-chlorine shock such as OXY-BRITE.

The shock treatment can be done with both chlorine and non chlorine substance. The non chlorine substance scores over the chlorine substance as it does cause any harm to person or clothing.

If such a thing as non chlorine treatment is available, why not go for it? By using these substances, most of the lives can be saved.

Why am I getting sentimental to mention life? Yes, the TCCA (Tirchloroisocyanuric acid) used to purify waters in the swimming pools can cause cancer. The dangers are as bad as the abbreviation of the acid.

This TCCA is not just used in pools but also in many households. Do you own a water purifier? Got yourself fooled again? Most of the purifiers also contain TCCA as a purifying agent.

What can be done?

· Raise voice against chlorine usage

· Use the medium like facebook to communicate to others

· Get people to read on the harmful effects

· When you come across pools or households using chlorine, warn them

As a citizen, it is very important to raise voice. Let us not delve in ignorance again.

The factor analysis

2011-04-30T07:04:00.000-07:00

The following write up is a subtle gender bias. Probably not the first time but there is only one gender I know of, while the other remains among the mysteries unraveled. “Girl talk” is what would be running in everyone’s mind. Defying the age old story, I say men are little hard to understand.

Among the 3.5 billion approximate, why is that we often fall for the special few? No, it is not a typos error; it is ‘few’ and not one. Also, ‘we’ here are the females. Unless we are shut away on a female island or our parents are extremely orthodox who run scripts of ‘abhishtu’s’ when we take a second look at a guy, I am pretty sure that we would have interacted with at least 20 men in our lives. Simple ones, hep ones, boasty ones or a character that is just inexplicable but we end up just pampering one.

What is that girls look out for in men?

Looks? We have our own subsets of external appearance: handsome, cute, a mix of handsome and cute, hunk, not good looking but something extra (when we don’t have an adjective) , hot, rot, skunk, sweet, sombu, pazham, nerd, stud etc. Quite an exhaustive list. Remember, nerd are not the ‘dislike’ types or hunks are not the ‘sought out’ types. Every guy with decent looks is up on the list. This way, looks are disqualified.

Intelligence? If that was the case, Einstein would have been celebrated till today. Too much intelligence is scary and too less, you know is dangerous. We look for intelligence that we can challenge and are willing to give in trivial fight. We don’t want a “you know nothing” in things that are too arbit or “you know a lot” in things that are important. We seek for intelligence that make quick decisions and stand to their forte; knows what to talk given a situation.

Maturity? Sages in age old eras did say the right thing, men mature late. Most times, never. Maturity is all about how one carries himself and what he talks. That is all. But, this character of life is the most difficult to portray. Maturity is hard to find and we don’t go searching for things that are hard to find. Period.

Polite, soft spoken? This generation is a totally influenced by movies. Polite and soft spoken are wrong signs. In fact, they are not even characters to define a person. If you lower the decibel in the voice, it becomes polite. Nothing more, nothing less.

Sense of humour? Does making someone laugh called a sense of humour? If not, what is? I believe sense of humour lies in individual’s capability to laugh and not in the person’s ability to make the other person laugh. I have known instances where I have seen girls laugh out loud and hard just for the expressions made by the boy. Does this qualify a sense of humour? Boys are boys and not circus clowns.

Down to earth, modesty? Consider a situation, when there is nothing to flaunt, how else do you expect the person to be? Modesty is recognized only in higher levels. When in small amounts, it is camouflaged in traces of ‘nothing’ness. So, calling a guy modest is just a symbol of appreciation and nothing to do with the inherent character. It just grows with age and sense of how others look at you.

Uber cool? What is this word/adjective of definition? Does it mean ‘a complete package’ types? Please look around. Found anyone? If yes, please let me know too.

I have all the characters that can make a guy lovable but not able to narrow down to that “x” factor of a guy. With myriad of choices, how does a girl seek one? How does she connect to very few guys and banish the rest?

Defying the age old story, I say men are little hard to understand.

But agreeing to it, women are extremely hard to understand.

the instincts

2011-04-23T08:34:00.000-07:00

Her & Him: New to place. Just a week.

Me :Been at the place for 2 months. Knows everyone quite well.

Her: "I am hungry, lets have lunch".

Me:" Lunch hour at office is from 1 - 2. Fifteen more minutes." (Not looking up from my desktop)

Her: "Come on! who follows the rules anyway. Lets go!" ( a little persuasive)

Him: Hmmmm...ya! I am hungry too. Lets go.

Me: "Hey! People at office will stare at us. Lets eat when everyone does."

Him:"Who is bothered about us here to notice?"

Me: "That is not the point. If we some one notices us today, then we will be the talk of the day." (A little irritated)

Her: Were you a 'first bencher' at school?

Me(shocked): "How did you know?!!"

Giggles. Laughter.

:'(

Why would I want a love marriage?

2011-04-22T03:54:00.001-07:00

The opinions are solely mine and please don’t take it too personal. I don’t want to be bombarded with questions. And don’t blame me if I have an arranged marriage J

This is for every man and woman who understood/understands/will understand the simplicity of words and genuine love. I am writing this for the love that lead/will lead turn to marriage.

Why would I want a love marriage?

Because you would know a person in prior and can have an understanding? Cheesy. Put two boys in a hostel room for three years and they would be ready for marriage. It is not about the “prior” knowledge that sets a love marriage apart but something more and not thought of.

Arranged marriage has thousand benefits of its own and I could put it in words much better than for love marriage.

Which of the men do you want to be in the court of law? The judge or the lawyer? Arranged marriage is where you are the judge while in love marriage, you are the lawyer. Why do you say so? If people at home were to arrange the marriage for you, your highest responsibility would be to accept or reject an offer. You look for the compatibles and much more before you can proceed into the offer. Love marriage is not that way. Love finds you; it is an age old secret of how it is done but it does find you. Compatibility is learnt on the go and then, you convince for the marriage to happen.

In an arranged marriage, you discover one another and try to attach all the strings together leaving behind the differences. Beautiful, is it not? But in a love marriage, you discover yourself. You would not know why you wait for the special person for 2 hours; you just wait. There would be no reason to most of the actions but it happens. Traits like selfish and possessive don’t disappear but you know they exist which you never understood for years.

Sacrifices and adjustment happen in both types of marriages but what is the stake is important. In an arranged marriage, there is a guarantee of things that wait. This is not true in love marriages. When you sacrifice something for another person without even knowing what is at the other end of the tunnel, does it make you a blind fool? Maybe it does and it is for the same unknown magical reason love marriages exist in our country today. Selfless motives behind every action and probably, no right results yet you are willing to take that stride.

Have you understood friendship ever in your life? Why is that sometimes, they are as important as the family or even more? Friendships play an important role in love marriages. No, I am not going into that bollywood and kollywood kind of fantasies. You will understand that friends are there just for you and nothing more or less. They are there for support and are your spine; they exist yet unseen. They would never ask the unnecessary questions are willing to hear to anything you say. You want them. Like never before.

What is being in a relationship mean? An elated feeling of not being alone and someone is there for you? Someone you can cuddle in cold nights and pamper in sunny mornings? Have a pet; it will serve the same purpose. Being in a commitment means you will think twice or more than usual. You will think for yourself and the other. You would know what is to take decisions through heart and not mind. Maybe you got into the relationship through mind, looking at the favorable things but when it comes being in it, you would just not think for yourself alone. Can anything in life teach you to make decisions as good as this? Has your life ever been planned like this?

I often consider that it is the duty of the people in a relationship to convince everyone, including parents. Maybe this is the first time you would have known what you want; so would your parents. There may be clashes or smooth handling depending on the family and beliefs but the first step is to approach the parents. They understand you and you understand yourself better. Among all the chaos, the bond just becomes a bit too tight.

Faith is a good thing. Faith is something that keeps you going. It helps you work towards something that you want so badly. Faith is why human exist and it is found in love. You do everything letting yourself believe that the other person will become yours some day. With love comes a package of emotions that don’t even have names.

Finally, it is the accomplishment that makes a love marriage altogether superior. The efforts that were taken to get that one person into your life will make memories. You went beyond all the conflicts, misunderstandings, no confidence and highest level of persuasion to get what you believed in. Whether this ‘love’ will exist for a long time, I do not know. For a marriage to last longer, faith and trust in each other is a must. For all people who loved before the marriage, it already happened.

(My friend,Sylvian, wrote about live in relationship. Awesome write up and recommended read. Every one has a right to put his opinion forward)

Midnight shadow

2011-04-18T11:03:00.001-07:00

She made a quick noiseless move and I sensed it right behind my spine. The silence that wrapped us was the savior of the moment but she chased him away.

“Are you writing again?”

I lingered on to my savior

“Hmm..that means you are thinking deep. It is not good for you to do that often.”

Bloody. She knew me.

“Anyway, looks like many like your writing. But do they know the reason for those masterpieces?”

“They are not masterpieces! Just amateur writing”, I gritted through my teeth. Temper erupted.

“Ahhhh..you love appreciation, don’t you?”, she asked in normal tone.

To me, it was a jeer.

“Everyone does”, I replied curtly.

“You want to be better than her. That could be a reason too. Feels like a loser?”, she whispered in my ears.

I didn’t reply. It was not true.

“Not everyone is gifted. You are just trying too hard. And all this is not going to bring him back”, she hissed in my ears again.

“Who?” , I asked in a meek voice. I knew the answer. I never confess.

“You can cheat the world, my girl, anyone, but not me. You can act like nothing happened but I know all the moments you cried.”, she said in a voice that brought back the memories.

I concentrated on the words I wrote. There were too many mistakes, just like in my life. The mistakes I never acknowledged. Mistakes that had happened because I didn’t think. Or maybe I thought too much.

“How do you know? What does it mean to you?”, I snarled.

She laughed. It trailed through my ears and seemed like life long.

“You are so vulnerable. You have nothing that is yours; love, money or even talent”, she laughed louder.

I stared at the words. They were crawling all over the place. The echoes of misery lashed everywhere.

Trrrriiiiinnngg

“Hello? Subha?”, I heard a familiar voice.

“Hey Srini!”

“What are you doing?”

“Hmmm..nothing. Was thinking what to write. What are you doing?”

She disappeared from the place and went into my head again. I shut her again; from myself.

Tagged & ragged!

2011-04-17T10:19:00.000-07:00

I have been tagged! Yes! Time to do some introspection and get those moment out of my life. With no hue and cry, here it goes..

1. If you could go back in time to relieve one moment, what would it be?
I am one of those blessed ones who had one quarter of my life as holidays. After my twelfth exam, I had almost 5 months before joining a college due to some clash between officials and students. after my Engg., I had solid seven months of idleness. In both cases, I didnt do anything. Not surprising? Still, I wish I put them to some use.So, I want to relieve those moments of idleness and add to my life now. I will make the best use of the time.I promise !

2. If you could go back to the time and change one thing, what would it be?
That one day decision to choose between State board and CBSE. I still feel I should have not switched to state board. Why is it all academic? I am a hard core Chennaite!

3. What movie or TV character do you think you resemble the most in personality?

Elektra! You see, thats my alter ego :)

4. Which movie or TV character would you love to be?

No movie character but JK Rowling. Or Chetan Bhagat :)

5. If you could push the one person in the whole world off a cliff and get away with it, who would it be?
Navjot Sidhu. Hate the way he speaks!

6. Name one habit you need to change in yourself.
Laziness. Duh!

7. Describe yourself in one word.
Creative

8. Describe the person who named you in MEME in word.
Simple and straight. Talented but modest. Quite a package I say :)

9. Why do you blog?
I love writing. I like trying out different stuff and writing is one of the most versatile action I have ever known.More important, I like being appreciated ;)

10. Name at least 3 people or more to send this MEME and then inform them.

Srivatsan: http://rivat-hanss.blogspot.com/

Viswa : http://www.vishfulthinking.com/

Iswarya: http://iswarya-m.blogspot.com/ (want her to write :))

11. Link back to the person who tagged you in this MEME.
http://kalyanb4u.wordpress.com/ Thanks a lot Kalyan :)

Introducing myself.The pain.

2011-04-12T01:03:00.000-07:00

I am pain. I am no ambivalence because I have no further degrees of existence. Big or small, I am still the pain.

I am prevalent somehow; I can be seen through externalities like expressions and sounds, at the same time, can be hidden in emotions. Thus, this chaos of dominance makes me special yet I am the unwanted. No, I am not related to sadness because I live in all myriads of human feeling. I can be felt in sadness, cured in injury, confused in failure, understood in rejection and most important, never do I come alone.

I can never be explained. I could sweep in through you to show my presence or stay in corner of heart and make it heavy but never has anyone been able to describe what I am.

I am underestimated and need my due respects. I could show who you really are. I am the reason for your introspection. I could help you realize the worth of many other feelings that you really look forward to. Would you realize happiness without me? Gain something you have always wanted without my assistance? Adding to millions of my service, would your emotions exist without me being there?

I am not God but a way to him; make you kneel before anything that you fear or love, the choice is yours. I am sometimes the pleasure you seek and sometimes, the relief you want. I am the origin of fear and result of action you might want or wish to avoid. When I am there, you would have no other companion but me. The only thing that ever hits your sense is to get rid of me. I am sometimes, your soul mate.

I am a symbiotic nuisance; I cannot exist without your will.

Understand me, for I have been misunderstood for ages. Without me, there is no victory, no self respect and no other emotion. I am the God. I am the devil.

Return gift

2011-04-03T12:07:00.001-07:00

“How long do you expect me to believe your story, Yaswath?”

“Neeta, you are mature enough to understand the situation. I have just finished my degree. Times are bad”

“I have been waiting for too long. People are pestering at home. Every girl is getting married”

“Neeta, it will happen soon. Just trust me. Where are you?”

“It is none of your concern”. Click.

Neeta collapsed on the stone staircase that led to an open elevated stage. She felt the park seemed unknown and very strange even though she had been in the city for 13 years. She stared at the tree and let her thoughts wander. She didn’t even bother than her white salwar and light blue dupatta were picking dirt.

Somebody tapped her shoulder.

“Didi, want groundnuts?”, said a small boy with chubby face that assured baby fat and frail body. He stood with a tin can almost his size that also carried paper folded in cones and stacked at one corner.

“How much for one?”

“Just 5 rupees didi. How many do you want?”, he asked eagerly.

“I will give you 20 rupees. Sit down here”, Neeta pointed out to the empty place next to her.

“Didi..I ..have..work..”. He was completely surprised and more curious.

“I will buy all your stock today. Now, will you sit?”

It was a tempting offer that he didn’t want to let go off. He carefully placed the tin on the lower staircase and sat down. He kept giving side glances at her. She didn’t say anything.

“Are you one of those kind?”, he broke the silence.

“Which kind?”, she asked suddenly shaken by his question.

“You know..the ones who do stuff with kids…”, he glanced at her but concentrated on the pavement in front of him. “Raju chacha has warned us against people like that. I know you are not but just assuring myself.”

“No. I am not”, she grinned at him.

“Thank God you are smiling. Now, can I go?”, he placed his hand on the tin.

“Not until you have answered one question. How do you trust someone?”, she asked looking straight into his eye.

“Didi..I don’t know..”

“Then, sit down and think of an answer”, She pulled him down to sit.

The silence prevailed. He watched the group of older men and women doing some movements at the other end of the part. There were young girls giggling over a photo album. He saw a group of men working on setting up a stage.

“Didi, there is going to be a show staged today. They are selling the tickets at the counter. Do you want one? It will lighten your mood.

“How much is the ticket?”, she asked disinterested.

“Just 50 rupees per head”, he explained with wide open eyes.

She took out a 1000 rupee note and handed it to him. “Get two, one for yourself and me.”

“Thanks Didi. Will be back in a jiffy”. And he took to his heels.

Fifteen minutes later

“The..ticket..two. . the change”, he gasped for breathe and handed over the money.

“Good. Now, sit down”, she insisted again.

He scowled at her and sat down. The silence was killing. ‘What does she want? All these rich people are crazy. Who cares as long as she is buying my groundnuts’. He continued to stare at the people.

“Maybe this is how you trust people”, he exclaimed.

“What?”, she asked, quite confused.

“You gave me thousand rupees. It was sign of faith.I took the sign and got the tickets. I had my chances to get away with the money but I didn’t. You just have to give time and benefit of doubt. Everyone has the chance to cheat but what he does in a situation is what trust is all about.”, he explained half immersed in glory and self appreciation.

It struck her. Yaswath had his chances too. He has been in America for almost three years and it has not been a day that he has never called. He had always been there for her. Tears began to flow from her eyes. She looked at her hand and saw a very thin gold bracelet that Yaswath had gifted her during their college days. He had used all his internship money on that. The boy was still looking at her for her reply. This boy made her understand something she was unable to answer for months.She took the bracelet and handed over to him.

“What are you doing Didi??”, he asked in shock.

“Take it. You will never know the value of your words”, she said and began fiddling with numbers on the phone. She moved out of the place leaving him to silence again.

Tring.Tring.

Click.

“Hello. Kaun?”

“Raju chacha, its me. Nitin. “

“What is it? Were you able to get something valuable?”

“Chacha,I spotted a lonely lady by the staircase with a gold chain “

“What happened then?”

“I could not do anything. I tried my best”

“You are so useless. Anyway, leave it. We will see tomorrow”.

Click.

He vowed to self that he wouldn’t steal again. There are good people in this world.

Semma figure : A write up for those understand this word

2011-03-30T12:02:00.000-07:00

Some words are specific to era and some, to a genre of species. But here is a collective noun used by both “our” era and reckless genre that depicts the Victoria’s secret, but in our native language: semma figure (figure to be pronounced as figur’u’). The first impression when the word is uttered seems crude and raw instigating a temper rise in anyone who hears it, surprisingly, that is not what happens. I am more than curious to know its origin; may be it was first used by a guy, probably a math freak and didn’t know how to describe his only girl friend.

This word is myriad in itself as it invokes different feelings and reactions in different people. I emphasize this because if pronounced properly and given the appropriate action stimulus, the response could work out in your favour.

(1) To modernize :

Guy 1 : “Machan! Yesterday, I went to the team outing da. There, I saw a semma figure”

Guy 2: “Is it? How was she da?”

Guy 1 : “Red kurta and blue jeans and she had left her hair open. Aiyoo, chanceless da “ (Give a dreamy look to drive in curiosity)

How many of us would see a girl of the same description? One in every street? But the understanding lies in the usage of the word. If I told you I saw a girl or even a pretty girl, it wouldn’t give this effect on the other person. When “semma figure” is used, it would give a sense that Sameera Reddy jumped out of the theatre screen and gave a kiss.

(2) To compliment:

Girl 1 : “Hey, did you see Vijay?”

Girl 2 : “No. why?”

Girl 1: “Want to slap him. He called me figure.” *giggle *giggle*

Just like Sheldon of Big bang theory, I can’t get the hang of sarcasm but my best bet is that she was proud of being called so. It is like being given a credit of a super model. Women may be annoyed with you for using a couple of swear words but not this paradoxical hypocrisy.

(3) An “adjective” ated usage:

Guy 1 : “Mokkai figure da”

Guy 2: “Yes da. Attu figure”

Guy 1: “Suma super figure nu nallapu”

(This could have been the reaction had the red Kurti girl said a no for his date invite. Also, there are no ways to translate this)

The concept here lies in the mixing of words to make it a proper adjective. The word ‘figure’ can be used in more than one way giving it a unique identity. It has various meaning from classy or sexy to rotten or ugly.

(4) Time pass usage:

Teacher: The angle depicted in this figure is 90….

*giggle*giggle*

Teacher turns around

“What happened? What is so funny in this figure?”

*more giggle*

Except for the Pi lovers, no one else will miss this instant of mocking mathematics. It is a pleasure in itself which makes you feel even prouder than Aryabhata who approximated Pi to its nearest value. It is like beating him in his own game, the cheap way. This is what the significance of the word is.

To find a word as this is a chance upon a million. A multi oriented word invoking different of reaction, sentiments and making language and expression easy.

I once remember my friend’s comment when his GF told him that she was called as one of the “figures” in her office. He just claimed even “8” was a figure.

Worked out at work place

2011-03-29T21:32:00.001-07:00

In this 21^st century, at the age of 24, you are definitely aged. You seem to have experienced everything in all aspects. Well, almost everything. Apparently, with this very same superior feeling, I have been interning at an advertisement agency. This is not my first “corporate “experience, still, I don’t get the hang of it.

Previous to this, I worked in an IT company and tried to fit into the best of professional character.Most of the time, food, water and clothing did not matter because of work pressure and late night shifts. I had the usual complains: less salary, more work and bad bosses. It stayed in mind to criticize and crib about the work load and company.All this, I did it without any remorse.Quite often they asked me to stay back because I was new to the work and had to learn a lot. The sad part was that this was the impression given to me for almost a year. If someone stayed for 16 hours at his cubicle meant he was the most hardworking and should be given better grades. Not long did I realize that programming never seemed to flow in my blood. Now, I have been corrected; there is nothing passionate or inherent talent flowing, but the usual RBCs and WBCs. Then, I realized it was high time I sought after better “standards” of living. With many futile attempts with applications and examinations, I ended pursuing MBA and I am back to square one.

I must agree that interning at an ad agency is much more chilled and less stressful;there is a difference between hectic and stressful. I got to know how things worked and what is expected of me. I am constantly reminded of who is the boss around and I need to give due respect. Here, we are allowed to dress in any attire and it dawned to me that miniskirts are not a thing to be worn only at night. I am a conservative south Indian, you know. Putting the jigsaw puzzle together,it seemed that this is what I wanted. Right? I sought for freedom to dress, move around, network, flexible timings and informal environment. It was never a stressful job that boggled my mind every time I was assigned to it. This was something I enjoyed doing. Being a little sane on the creative end, even executing a task was not tough at all. Everything seemed picture perfect.

Still, in the corner of my mind is a nag; a nag that says that I am not very happy or satisfied. There is no elated feeling of accomplishment that I used to get in my previous work. This was monotonous and no permanent friends as some one or the other left the agency every two months. There was no joy eating together smiling artificially or looking at every face that was enjoying alcohol in a team party.

In despair,I began to wonder if I could ever be satisfied with any job. After some thought and little prod around, it dawned to me that it was not just me but with many others. Though many did not work in two entirely different industries as I did, the complains did not end. It was nothing to do with oneself or the job but the sync that prevailed between the two. When the person performed the same task over again and again, he sure is bound to get bored and state of restlessness settles in. The complains start and monotony continue. This was the same thing with me. I could not see any of them as challenging or problem to solve, rather, I looked at them as a measure to satisfy someone, the client or the boss or the guide. I did not seem to understand why I am working but was doing everything with no mind of my own.

It was my perception that did not satisfy me and not the work place. To love my job, I have to change the way I look at a task. And for that, I need to look at it as a challenge. So, I was looking at a couple of a soap advertisement and framing taglines. I had to trigger the interest within but certain interests are inherent.If thats the case, why not make them your profession? Is it possible? I am very sure more than 80% percent would be answering a “no” mentally to this question. Maybe these interests are not invoked in our jobs but we have a choice to make something out of it. Why not try to bring together what we like and what you want to do? With the same lines of thought, I wrote this article

Dear men,

2011-03-16T00:38:00.000-07:00

(I remember one of my friend's note on women. Wanted to reply there but it could have seemed feministic. That is not the intention.)

No, this is not another one of those moments where every girl is cute but dumb and every guy is the overly "saintified". This is for the 'men', group of gender who think they know all that exist and everything that might cease to extinct. Maybe, it’s true. And we agree. That makes the essence of rest of the article.

(1) We are the most confused creatures. It is not because of enumerable options that lie in front of us but we think too much and for everyone. Most of the times, everyone is equally important for us.That is not a problem; it is entangled strings of thoughts that make decisions confusing for us. The only suggestion we would make here is don’t confuse us more. We understand your in-depth knowledge of everything but leave certain things to us. Especially when dealing another woman.

(2) We are sick of the jokes that are made on us, yet, we would laugh at yours. It is not sympathy or pity. We thought that was your intention. To make us laugh, right? *giggle giggle*

(3) We are lost when it comes to direction. Just as you are lost when it comes to names and date.

(4) Sigh! We are one jealousy beings. We hate it when you compliment other girls. We are conscious of our looks. This is the reason that cosmetic industry makes billions. No , you are not at all jealousy types. Just a little possessive. A little too much that you can’t stop questioning about a guy whom we smiled at near the coffee machine.

(5) We would love to dress up for you. Everything you demand. Like the models or the girl who is next to your cubicle in office. Alas! We don’t have the money the movie star has or the over generous boyfriend the next-cubicle- girl goes out with.

(6) We went to school just like you, we went to college just like you and we would go to workplace too. We fought along with you all the years with the system, the education scenario and everything that seemed impossible to you. This entire thing narrows to the factor that we too are incapable of cooking or drawing rangolis. If you can do either of these, we are truly pleased and appreciative. It doesn’t mean you are doing something that a girl should be doing. We have done enough that you were supposed to do.

(7) When we say a swear word, it is just another swear word. It is not that we are showing off or pervert types or we are trying to modernize. We picked it from some guy who used it after every syllable.

(8) Don’t you dare talk about our father. We hate to do that with your mother.

(9) You pay our shopping bills. You pay the bills at restaurants. We give only missed calls. You bring a gift every time you see us. We ignore you to show that we are superior beings. You will have to make the first move.Did you also know that moon is going to swallow earth within next ten years? Ridiculous, is it? Tell me more, I am listening.

(10) Our mood swings faster than blink of an eye. You are aware right? Then, were that immediate seven missed calls necessary when we say we want to be left alone for sometime?

(11) Like the finger prints, every girl is different from another. Stereotyping doesn’t make any sense. If you knew girls were like this only and things that they expected, why wait for the “one” to sweep you off the feet?

(12) Appreciate women for what they do for you. They too have a life, a career and things to handle. It wouldn’t hurt to praise them once a while. But, please don’t make it too often that it irritates us. We know when you flatter us or lie. We just act innocent for you. We are epitome of lies. We lie to save our asses and yours.

One last question that has been nagging my mind, when you think we are so imperfect, confused and selfish, why marry us?

P.S.; I understand that not all women hold beliefs and think like I do. For those who don't, I am sorry. You can your own perception and PUT IT UP IN YOUR BLOG!

Chennai calling but no one coming!-PART I

2011-02-12T23:42:00.000-08:00

This rambling is not for you but for me, to assure and advocate my feelings and thoughts on certain issues. I don’t want to convince anyone on this and don’t expect people to sympathize or acknowledge the facts I am going to put across. Then why am I writing this? I ask you the same, why not?

I am a south Indian, so, a part of “conservative” already exists and has been enriched more by another fact that I live in Tamil Nadu. Most people literally fear coming to any place in Tamil Nadu which includes Chennai and if you beg to differ, we can fight it out on off- record. The reasons are innumerable; food, people, climate and even the crappiest reason one can think of.

Don’t blame us for the “language barrier” that exists with us. We are the ones who could learn anything except what does not exist. Hindi, to us is like any other foreign language and to learn that, it is a necessity that we come out of our state. And that is kind of impossible looking at the opportunities that exists here.

We, the “madrasi” love our own food which includes the idli,sambhar and the curd rice. Maybe it is weird to the rest of the country as how people can survive on these foods on all four meals a day. We ask you the same, ‘aloo’ all the time?

No, we didn't ask the sun to come along this way and make it blazing hot. We hate the sun as much as anyone. Thanks to geographic location that extra pigment of melanin has been imbibed in our skins. We have to fight the quota system and hence, can’t fight the sun. If you ask any child what 69% means to him (except the pervert spoilt brats), he would say a huge margin. That is the quota system in our state. Even we are confused as in how so many castes entered our state. The so-called-forward-caste is nowhere forward in any aspect but no one would believe here.

Brahmins can be hated here. Maybe this is the strongest argument I have ever put across but I believe there are some prejudices that need to be cleared. ‘They will not move around with anyone and talk to none other than their own clan’. Sigh! I thought that it was a norm in our country. ‘They are proud and arrogant of their caste’. Bull! Just give me a reason to be proud about. I am someone who can’t read a tamil sentence straight, let alone read the Vedas and other chants. The only reason I am a Brahmin is that two elderly people chose two from their own clans to come together and get married. I have made no contribution to the “upper caste” .

I have not been to many places but I am aware of the myths and preconceived notions that surround our place. We are learning from our past and mending ways where we bound to be wrong. The food is not bad as you think, people are not conservative old types as everyone says and lungi is not our official dress!

P.S.; More parts yet to come.

5.AnotherOne

2011-01-12T23:16:00.000-08:00

A wave of disgust creeps through my body when I see some arbit minuscule objects, creatures and sorts of same kind. There is something about the very size that intrudes and strikes a resemblance to my reflection in the mirror. I have always imagined a six foot knight in shinning armour , least forgotten was that the princess had to match his height. Genes is as assorted and confused as my family and again (apart mathematic genes that skipped earlier. Post here) wasn’t passed to the rightful elder heir. Rather, it helped in growing my size horizontally than vertically.
Keeping aside the negativities of smallness, a major attribute about it is that it is considered cute, sweet and adorable but never attractive, beautiful or head turner.

Just like I try hard for everything else, I have tried more than enough to add inches to my height. Starting from the health drink that was shown in advertisement which had over attractive mother and child that stuck to her like leech but grew like earthworm.(And I am pretty sure that the “child” must be at least 15 years old who forgot to grow). Making Murphy my beloved, I quote this. Anything that is supposed to cause good, tastes/appears bad. My mother had to chase me around every day and force gallons down my throat; the taste that lingered longer than any alcohol available.

Man made innovative things with iron that we were made to hang like clothes on it . “If not the food, it can be done through exercise”, my mother claimed like God was listening to every word she said. The futile exercise was carried on for years which left my arms sore.

I was doing my part too. I enrolled in the basket ball team. The reason initially was because one the cutest guy was in the boy’s team and it was a perfect excuse. After being a substitute for years together and not getting the guy either, I gave up on the game.

We have our own excuses. In Chinese, small feet are beautiful. Most of the successful people are short, for example, Sachin Tendulkar ( No, it doesn’t include Ramesh Powar). Short people rule the world, example Hitler. But then, everyone including us know that we are just consoling ourselves.

Short people obviously become the first benchers adding woes into already miserable life. We are the most victimized in sense of cheeks being pulled and used as hand rest for anyone and everyone above our height. Photos had to be shot from down angle and people sat when posed with us. The aura around us is never intimidating and thus, we are the most approachable people ever.

I often look at the mirror and find hundred faults. That could be with anyone but I have thanked enough for having the hands, legs and everything that makes me normal. God is never unfair, its only human nature to find fault with everything.

I smiled at my reflection “thank you God for everything. But just 2 more inches please…”

L for love

2010-11-12T07:03:00.000-08:00

In less, life in a lackadaisical but lucrative labor of load some, literally lessens the likeness of leading to liberty. Lack of leap of faith disallows libidinous in lieu of lust. Loathe of loaf in locked out labyrinths of lunatic locals leads to lesions of loser. Live limiting to lie and not loiter in lifeless pursuit of longevity which likely lies on loneliness.

Only legality is losing you to the liking of loner likely unknown. Look at light looming over loots of luck and understand the lullaby of Lord.

Its L love LOVE!!

dysfunctional

2010-10-10T12:09:00.000-07:00

Off lately, there have been instances when I have been vexed up just because of ego problems. Not ready to accept what the other person says. In the course of such actions and in spite of it being my entire fault, I have never blamed myself for that. Why? Because I have listened enough to others that my life has been led by other people’s advises and suggestions. Now, when I seem mature enough to make own decisions, people ask questions and are able to find problems.

I was never sure if I did want to do biology in my twelfth standard or hold a yet another engineering degree till end of my life. I am still not sure. Those were days when decisions were made for me. I have no regrets; I never have regrets with things I have done but to think of the fact that I could have done something else and been someone else makes me wonder. Everything I have done so far in my life has had significance and I have done quite well. When I look at the profile that has been prepared now, I think I have quite justified with whatever opportunities that have crashed down the door. Still, in one corner of the heart, an annoying call of guilty retains.

Should I have done things I really wanted to do? I remember telling my neighbour that I would become a ‘forensic detective’ someday. It was triggered plainly by some Enid Blyton books which I used to adore and follow religiously. I still smile at that remark made. But, I haven’t changed since then. I still would love to be a forensic detective because I still love those books. Do childish ambitions like this ever come true? 24 of years of living, I still can’t answer that.
I have often seen parents imposing their ambitions on their children. The most surprising part is that they are eventually achieved. It is because parents go to any extent of sacrifices to get the best out of their progeny. In this vivacious cycle of desires, do the children fail to know what they want? Have I forgotten what I wanted?

20 years down the lane, will I be doing the same? I have told myself that I would teach my children dance and a music instrument. Have I forgotten the golden rule of respecting a child’s wishes? But my child wouldn’t what he/she wants. Was it same with my parents? Didn’t I know what I wanted? Questions have been unglorified and in the end it has been what others have wanted. They have what they wanted. Here is a girl of their wishes and will carry the torch of family forward.
I wonder what I am filled with. Guilt? Annoyance? Ignorance? Ambitions? All I want to do right now is run away from the world and make time to introspect.

Cash flow in simple terms

2010-09-18T21:35:00.000-07:00

“Hello doctor, how do you manage your work and family life?”, I asked looking at his tired face.

Simple, operation, invest and finance.

"Huh?"

(1) Do the operations properly as they are my revenue generating activity, I mean my livelihood.

(2) Then, before I can take come the money to family, I try to invest. I cant give my wife the money, so I purchase assets like gold or something. Sometimes I try to sell away my liquor bottles before going home, those are like selling my assets.

When I do all these, I receive a lot of things.

(3) With the rest, I finance. I hate the word finance, it is all about pay, pay and pay!!

Pay the interest, pay the dividend, repayment of loan.

“Hmmm..interesting”, I said. “How does the family react?”

It all begins with my income statement. After all, that is the thing they are worried about. When I take my profit made, after the buggers have deducted the tax. Lets say this as my profit after tax, family starts a calculation on this. Calculations occur on the inverse order!!

My family is very weak in math, so they add the expenses and subtract the income .

“That is crazy!”, I said.

“No, that is not crazy. That is how they get the gross profit!”

“Then?”, I asked.

“Understand murphy’s law always. Good things always move away and bad things always come to you. So, an increase in asset is cash outflow and increase in liability is cash inflow”.

“Life sucks!”, I said.

“Ya , I know. Family does a post-mortem of my gross profit as stated as above”.

“Is it over then?”, I asked. He laughed.

“ Everything ends with tax again, subtract it to get my lovely money from the operations”.

“Tell me more about the investments. Impressing your wife and disposing your bottles”.

“As I told you before, I receive a lot of things. Add them. When I sell my bottles, I get money. Add them. But, when I buy gold, I shell out money. Subtract them. Remember loans given and advances come here. That’s it. Done with my investments.

“Your financing?”, I asked again” You hate the word na?”

“Yes, subtract and subtract everything that is paid! Your finance looks out of shape!”

“Is that all?

“You are forgetting the non cash”

“There are non cash????”

“Yup! Like the profits that I make on selling my bottles or sometime, I do make provisions . All these are either added or subtracted from PAT. Like, Provisions when increased over years are added and gains & losses I make are subtracted and added respectively.

“In the end, add all the cash from operation, investments and financing”

“Wow!! That is one hell of calculation your family does”.

“I know. In the end we know our cash flows!”.

Don't wake me from fantasy

2010-09-06T11:36:00.000-07:00

The world is gory dark, you make me visible,
Deep oceans and farthest skies,
Can you measure it all?
That is the intensity of my affection for you.

You can't read me, neither can I show it,
If given a chance, would die thousand deaths for you.
Life was simple, you complicated it,
Added oodles of expectations and surprises.

I was sane till you came into my life,
Despite that, burden seemed less and strength I gained.
You are the only one to make me cry,
Yet, you are the first one to wipe them away.

Where would I place all the gratitude?
Which told me that life was worth living.
If words meant all, I shall string together,
For them to end, even universe is negligible.

A request I place, till the journey to my grave,
Don't leave me to tackle the world all by myself,
Don't challenge, It is not that I can't,
But if you did, I would be only half a human

celebrating mediocrity

2010-09-06T11:12:00.000-07:00

We are the mediocre. No great looks, no astounding brains or any sign of achievement.
We are the jack of all trades, and truly master of none.
We are the multitaskers, and could give you a complex.
We don’t take life seriously because nobody takes us seriously.
No, we don’t have qualms about that because we don’t care.
We are allowed to make mistakes,
We judge the system and throw questions, because system is only for achievers.
We are the manipulators, the innovators and anything you see around was because of us,
People call us lazy; that we are but then, we make you feel good.
We don’t know what we want in life,
And because of the very reason, we try variety in life.
Love doesn’t come easily for us but then we never give up,
Life is a game and we take the chance.
We come out as dull but never boring; parties never happen without us.
We are masters of tactic and time consumption,
We exist, therefore we are the mediocre.

Thank you :)

2010-08-31T21:27:00.000-07:00

One of my closest friend here put up this as a poster on my bday :) Thanks Sumit. God bless you loads :)Made me feel really special.

When u come, people run.. some even try to jump,
It’s your courage that you take this as your triumph.

How can we forget to mention your awesome play in baddy (badminton),
When you hit smashes players hide out and cry aloud really baddy.

Even your helping nature is like one big crane,
That’s why we never mention in front of you even if we have some pain,
Coz we know you pick up any1 down and put them directly into drain.

We are fan of your skills to pull up the CP,
We wonder how can a person just pull out something, impress and than for rest of the period just do TP (time pass)

Though never wanted to tell the truth, but letting it up for every1’s gain,
Every thing above is our brain train,
We know here is Subha and Subha is here to reign,
But today let her be only our friend and let us take this gain.

Many Many Happy Returns Of The Day Dear.. God Bless..

Billion hearts beating

2010-07-29T21:34:00.000-07:00

He loves your parents.
He loves your siblings.
He loves your life partner.
All you need to do is take care of him.

Billion hearts beating. Take a pledge by leaving a comment in this post.

Life, through his eyes

2010-07-24T11:55:00.000-07:00

The December wind blew over making him shutter slightly. He hated the wind but today he had no qualms. He gazed into nothing and was very aware of the silence around. His heart beat was rhythmic. And heavy.

"Cry!cry! waaaaahhh!", Sristi laughed dodging away from him.
"You are acting like a kid", he replied trying to catch her.
She laughed again. He thought she was beautiful. There was nothing extraordinary about her except the mysterious aura. A ready smile and eyes full of innocence. The eyes he could stare into for eternal.
"Cry and I will give it back to you ", she said fanning herself with his college certificate.
"Boys don't cry, in case you didn't know", he retorted back.
"Ya right! Macho man!", she flung herself over him, "Congrats! You are an engineer now!". She hugged him tight.

The thoughts made him shutter more. Her softness lingered somewhere on him. He settled on the grass.

"Can we marry? Today?", she asked.
"What??! ", he exclaimed scanning around to see if anything hit her.
"C-A-N ..W-E.. M-A-R-R-Y?", she asked stressing on every word.
"You were alright in the morning. Must be the ice cream," he said.
She was disappointed. He hated to see her like that.
"Don't you think its too early? I mean, I don't even have a job right now. Let me do my Masters and come back quickly. Four years more..no..three..that should be fine. You can wait na?"
"You are going to US and what am I supposed to do here alone?", she asked meekly.
He could see tears brimming in her eyes and nose turn red. 'She is very cute even when she cries'.
"Don't worry, as soon as I get a job , I will send across the tickets. You can join me!", he replied.
"Shut up!", she said softly.
She was irresistibly beautiful.He kissed her.

He closed his eyes for a moment to visualise and feel the tenderness of her lips. He moved his hands in air like he was playing with her hair. For a moment, he forgot he was alone.

He jumped slightly to get a glimpse of the entrance gate.
"Beta, be careful. Study well. Take care of your health. Don't get into the habit of alcohol", his mother listed the do's and dont's.
"Ya amma. I will heed to all that", he replied still looking at the gate.
"Whom are you searching for?", his mother asked , quite annoyed.
"Sristi!", he shouted and waved at her.
She waved back running towards him. She was intimidated by the presence of the whole family but he didn't care. He just hugged her oblivious to the surprise 'aah's and ooh's' in the family.
She blushed. "I got this for you", she handed over four t shirts and two sweaters.
"Beta, you have too much luggage already. Give it to me and I will keep it at home", his mother offered.
Sristi's face saddened.
"No amma, I am carrying it with me. "
He opened the suitcase in the middle of the airport and handed some of his clothes to his mother. He placed her gifts in his bag.
"Amma, I don't need those clothes. I will take hers", he told her. His mother was thoroughly annoyed.

His heart felt heavy. He wondered if his ambitions were wrong. He wondered if he should have ever come to US.His heart beat faster.

"15 missed calls Rahul! You couldn't return even one?", she cried over the phone.
"Very sorry sweetheart. I was very busy with my summer internship. I had to finish off what the professor asked me to do by evening".
"You could spare 5 minutes for me!", she cried again.
"You are too good that if I pick the phone to talk, I just can't put it down in five minutes", he replied.
"You are ever ready with an excuse", she claimed and hung up on him.
He knew she would call back. After ten minutes, phone rang.He picked it.
"Darling..sweetie..beautiful..sugar pie....

He smiled. He could never count the number of words he used to flatter her with and the excuses he used to make her happy.He should have been honest with her. He had always felt insecure. He wanted the best for her. He always lived in the fear that he would not be able to give her the best.He was lost in thoughts.

"Rahul, its over", she said.
"Why why why?", he held the phone tightly.
"You have no love for me", she reasoned.
"That is foolish! I am totally crazy about you. I cant live without you", he exclaimed.
"Prove it. Come back to India and speak to my parents. I cant wait any longer.There is so much pressure here that I cant take it. Why dont you ever understand. ?", she choked while she spoke.
"Darling, my semester exams get over by August. I will positively get a job by December. Just wait for another 10 months. Please. I will definitely come back then", he argued in his favour.
"We will just tell them about our relationship. Please. We could postpone everything later but tell them now.", she begged.
"How can I do that? I have no job . I cant do that. Just 10 months please", he held the phone even tighter.
"Please Rahul, I beg you. Lets tell them"
"Sristi.....please...Understand my position too".
"Rahul, its over." He heard a click on the other side. He knew the phone would ring in ten minutes. He hoped.

"What have you done to me?", he thought. He had made several attempts to call her but there was no response. He heard that her marriage was fixed to some other guy putting his 7 years of relationship with her to an end. He didn't want any details after that. There were no plans of visiting India again. Not for now. Her memories haunted and made him lonely.
"Boys don't cry. In case you didn't know", he said softly. He put his head over the knees letting tears take over him.

A husband called Mathematics

2010-07-21T10:08:00.000-07:00

To every good thing, there is an exception-An exceptional quote by one of the well known Roman philosophers. From the day of 25th August, 1986 , I have been trying to prove this exact point to my over adamant parents who refuse to agree. Hailing from one of the high class "Math-freak" family, I was expected to carry on the torch of quantative glory till the end of my life. Obviously, everyone was in for a great shock when I made my first mistake of 2+5 in the I standard. My father went into a state of mental trauma, mother shut herself in the puja room and silence engulfed the entire house provoking me to get the answer right. Being a man of practicality, my father wanted to bring a new approach to the problem using "practical" approach. Whenever 2 toffees and three pencils sum came across, he gave away the exact number of toffees and pencils to help me count. His practical way of teaching stopped when I came to him with a sum that involved "4 cars and 2 bikes". The numeric trait just skipped a gene in my case but sister was gifted with the ability making matters worse for me. While I was crying over simple problems of permutation and combination, she would be calculating the GDP of the country. The only time my P& C was legally right was when I calculated the right amount of time to act busy and ignore her when she came to me with her doubts. This legacy with Maths disaster continued all through my school life and was very evident in my board exams. Coaching classes with one of the best mathematics teacher, Mrs. Gowri, didn’t help me either. While my best friends solved problems with passion and pleasure, I only gazed at the geometric circles like they were determining my destiny. In my classes, I vividly remember being taunted by a bi-spectacled teacher who had laughed a wicked laugh when I didn’t know how to make a thousand with eight 8s.I had to put in extra-extra-extra efforts to scrape through the subjects in my school days. Fate has a plan on its own and when it is mixed with family decisions, it becomes a deadly combination. I was to do engineering after my 12th and knew maths was going to become my "double sided cellophane tape" boyfriend who would never depart. In my Engineering, the only maths I remember is calculating the "probability " of rain on the exam day, paper getting leaked and me passing the exam(and always landed with consistent zero).
I have many reasons to hate the subject. It freezes my mind and makes me surrender to it within moments. The numbers, x's and y's do a tribal dance in front of my eyes putting me to desolation and run away for salvation. I must agree I have had very little pleasurable moments with the subject and one of them was 'counting my salary'. My company made it easy for me too; giving away as less as they can. I think I have decided to commit a double suicide when I joined MBA program recently. During one of the financial management tests, I literally gave up on my 16 years with numbers. I wonder why I get up at '6' in the morning to take '8' mugs shower, scamper on the '4' idlis and walk under '40' degree sun just to realize numbers make no sense in my life.
The wikipedia definition of husband goes like this - The rights and obligations regarding his spouse, others and status in the community and in law varies between cultures and over time. In my case my 'husband- Maths' never gave up on me, following loyally, multiplying the expectations, adding my owes and screwing me royally.

P.S.; I wrote the first line quote. You wouldnt want a quote from a loser!

Techie and me

2010-07-07T07:11:00.000-07:00

I realised that I was lost without technology. Shut away from the world and thrown into cellulars of darkness. Got my lappy today and 'era of blogging' begins again :D

Mappillai, mami and filter kaapi - 2

2010-06-01T04:17:00.000-07:00

I looked out for him in the gathering.Sriram,dressed in dark blue t-shirt , legs stretched across the table and discussing something with great intensity in a gang of five that I assumed would have been of trivial value .I ceased to exist from the scenario. I sported a new hairstyle and was credited as 'the best look ever' by my almost-lakme-model cousin.

Until recently,Sriram loved my hairstyle so much that he dragged it in every joke among our friends and I don't blame him. The frenzy style that could be mistaken for a squirrels nest. I had secretly tried out many ingredients over it but in vain. It refused to un-frenzy itself even with world's every ingredient over it. 'Curly hair is cute, you know', one of my friends had offered but Sriram had shown himself up at the right moment and when he heard 'cute' and 'me ' together, broke into hysterical laughs and it was my doomsday since then.

After one year of consultation with cousins, friends, sister and parents, I straightened my hair. Now it was tamed and I had to show this to him. It might shock him and leave him amazed. That is the look I wanted. But how was I to grab the attention? I saw his mother whispering something into hear. I was pretty sure he never even bothered to hear to it as he was eyeing a girl right across the table. 'idoit', I thought.I waited for his mother to leave.

I pondered. Probably I should just say a 'hi' but then that wouldn't produce the required effect. So, I planned to walk right across him and make sure he noticed. Maybe I could walk right across him calling out my sister's name loudly that he can hear. Yes, that would be it.
I trailed a path in my mind and followed it.
Sriiiinnnnnnnniiiiiiiittttttthhhhh.........
My voice was loud enough to fill the hall. Everyone turned their head towards me.
Yes! I grabbed the attention! Except that I landed right over my stomach, flat on the ground. The hall was silent for two microseconds and I heard giggles here and there. Sriram was not giggling;he was having a fit because of too much laughing. I got up immediately, straightened my clothes and left the place.
'Nice hairstyle!', he shouted.
'Your face!' , I replied back.

Yehaan kya ho raha hai?

2010-05-22T04:44:00.000-07:00

My respects to the Victoria ji. Hell no! Not the queen of England but my eighth standard Hindi teacher who involuntarily threatened me to learn the Hindi language by failing me hundred times. Without her, where would I be? Lost in the green paths of ICFAI campus and joining the leagues of monkeys amongst the mango trees. My attempt with the language may be pathetic but with appropriate signals and little of dumb-charades , the message is delivered. With the message acknowledgement comes a question- are you a localite? I am glad to be recognised as "one of the south Indians" but when everyone finds out; from watchman to class lecturer, it does make me check my dressing sense more than once. One of the elites clad in salwar kameez and smiling lustfully at the thick curd that is given away in the mess does put me in the appropriate category.
My Hindi reached heights when I did frame a proper sentence with what I learnt in my eighth standard.
"First floor ka (or ki, I don't know) Kidiki kula hai"?
One of the assistants of the warden gave me a look like I had vomited on her face.
I tried again
"Uper bathroom ka kidiki kula hai?"
Like my Accounting subject staff said, 'Be clear in context when it comes a lay man.' A woman in my case :D.
She gave me the same look and I was thinking of another rephrase when she suddenly pounced on me to declare that she does not know Hindi.
Cool! I was in a greater dilemma. I need to learn the native language now.
Telugu here is totally different from what my 'golti' friends spoke. I am surprised that I was fooled by the fact that I thought I knew Telugu. So, I had to manage with mix of English and Hindi.
Adding to language hazards, I am also one of the abnormal ones to roam about the campus alone. I get looks like 'maybe a wierdo' but I must say I do enjoy certain privileges of judging people. It is not like I don't want to make friends but I am taking my own time.
Subjects on the other hand are driving me crazy. Here is a manager in the making who cant differentiate between asset and liability and especially when they are supposed to equated. When I asked my neighbour , she explained so much that put me to shame and I went on looking down at the book and acted like I was solving a very particular crisis in our country. I was double embarrassed in another incident when I interacted with my study partner only to discover that he was 'at least' three years younger to me certifying me as an 'aunty' to them .Adding to the owes, he claimed 'hamari group mei sab meri batch se hain'. It gave me a headache and I slept for 12 hours straight.
Left with very little choices,I am planning to visit the city tomorrow with people of my own age group ( My best buddy since school days) and watch a movie at IMAX. To help me wash away all the sorrows .

Week that was - 'B' School

2010-05-21T06:08:00.000-07:00

My first week at B school and I havent a single soul who speaks my native language :'(
I shuttle from class to room
I lose way to mess and everywhere
I am lost in accounting class
I understand nothing of statistics either
Now, you wonder why am I here?
I wonder the same.
Headache.Severe.

A dedication

2010-05-15T00:42:00.000-07:00

A dedication by Gayathri to me :) . Thanks a lot girl . God bless you :)

Hi Subs..

Jus wanted to write a mail to u in remembrance of “Our Friendship”. I am not as Good as u in writing. This is directly from my heart.

THANKS SUBS..

For all those lovely times u gave..

For all those silly talks we had..

For all those gossips..

For times we spent doin nothing and roamin.

For bringin me back.

Loved those moment and cherish them till end.

Happy to be ur friend.

Sad to say Bye L.

Hope and wish our friendship continues as now!!!!

Our friendship will always be cherished in my heart.

I use these words only to my close one

Now happy to add you in that list subs.

I LOVE U(in proper sense ;-) )

WILL B MISSING U!!!!

Take care Subs!!

Regards,

Gayathri Rajendran.

14th of May- My last post at Infosys Forum :'(

2010-05-13T05:31:00.000-07:00

The sky is orange, solitary I am here,
Oh waves! Minster of the ocean,
Carving everything on your way,
Utter the things I want you to say,
Men have come and gone,
So have their wise sayings,
You have witnessed them all,
Hence, it is your memoir now,
Teach me life, tell me words,
Caution I say, I dislike advises.
He roared with virtue,
Came with the words,
“Whatever I tell you, my child”,
“Is worthy of my experiences”

(1) Jealousy is a feeling; a basic human character. You are not a saint and so you are allowed to vent that emotion. You would feel jealous if your boy friend / girl friend praised another person or even when your own sibling is appreciated. The jealousy can be materialistic too. It is not wrong to feel jealous about something but concealing it is maturity. Don’t let jealousy get better of you.

(2) Love can teach you many things; sacrifice and selflessness. It can teach you patience and make magical things around you. But what ‘love’ can’t teach you is to ‘un-love’. Whenever broken in a relationship, move on even if it is hard. It will teach you more sacrifice, selflessness, patience and everything becomes less magical and more practical.

(3) If you looked at the mirror and want to describe yourself, you will see half your life was influenced. No, don’t blame yourself for that. Our society has been framed that way. Even when you are totally independent and plan to go out of country, you are still expected to inform someone at home.

(4)Friends are asset. I am not sure if they are your alter egos or life lines but they define who you are now. They help you grow and better yourself. Few ones stay but ones who just passed your life teach you a lot. Friends who stay give you support whatever may be the situation. Both kinds of friendship are very necessary. Don’t shrug off friendship; every person has something to teach you.

(5)Brooding is a way of venting; a passage to relieve the heaviness in the heart. Sometimes you brood about everything and anything and, sadly, to everyone and anyone. What you must understand is that when you brood to a person, remember, you need have open ears when the other person broods to you too.

(6)Everyone has regrets in life and they flash every time we are low. For instance, you might have regretted being in so-and-so college. If you look at where you are now and introspect, being in that college wouldn’t seem very significant. What I tell you is that, you will not be able to forgive yourself in your entire life if there was an opportunity in front of you and you still ignored it. Those are the greatest regrets in life. Regrets are not with what you did in life but what you didn’t.

(7)Attention is something that attracts everyone like magnet. You tend to like the person who attends to you. The more that affection showered more the liking towards the person. With affection comes expectation which can be calculated as more the affection, more the expectation. There is nothing wrong in fulfilling the expectation but too much of fulfillment would lead to adhesive closeness. At one point of time, you may wonder if you are the person who is leading your life.

(8)Work on your strengths and never be ashamed of it. Reach out your strength to everyone and you will be surprised to see how many people enjoy your work. Talents are gifts and you can afford to spend time over them. Also understand that there is no one who can advertise you other than yourself.

(9)Be practical enough to understand that you can’t be Shahrukh Khan and have fans following you. Leave that to destiny but what you can do is respect people who respect you. Be respectful enough not to intrude into other person’s privacy. No one is perfect; you are part of that ‘no one’ too.

(10) Foolish those who say forgive and forget. If you can’t forget something that someone has done to you, it is equivalent that you haven’t forgiven them. The only thing you had to is to ignore that the thing happened. We are not Buddha but we are human being.

(11) Don't ask a question you never want to answer. Don’t advise things you never want to hear. Don’t utter words that you never can take it. Don’t justify anything to someone you love. All that was given somehow comes back to you.

(12) Compromise isn’t a negative word always. There are some things you never want to compromise; your goals and ambitions but most of the others can be compromised. Understand, we don’t live just for ourselves.

(13) Lastly, nothing waits for you. Neither time nor love. Life can’t be perfect. Making the best out of the imperfection is what you must do. Only your shadow follows you.

It came to an end, the way of life,
He made a great halt and I bowed,
“The mighty old king of sea,
You teach me more than I need”
The sun hid himself leaving thee to thyself

The CYLINDERELLA story

2010-05-10T08:30:00.000-07:00

Statutory warning : Boring post

The baby slept in bliss in her mother’s arms. Her lips were red and cheeks pink.
‘Most beautiful baby’, claimed her mother warming the baby.
‘Madam, the gas agency people are here. We will get our cylinder today’, informed the maid intervening the happy couple.
This made them happier.
‘Cylinder!! Wow wow! How long have we been waiting for one!! This child is very lucky for us!!’ shouted the father in joy “And to remember this occasion, we will christen her Cylinderella!!”
“Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa….”

Mother dies. Don’t ask how because it is not important but what is that father marries again. Like in most south Indian serials, father has no role to play after this. He gets drunk, beaten and flees to marry another lady. I know that is a pathetic exit but no other reason would justify his disappearance.

So, our poor Cylinderella is put up with her step mother and two step sisters in a medium sized thatched roof. I retain the step sisters’ gender because I want no controversies. Now, don’t pounce on me to ask if two females can’t cause any controversies.

Cylindrella grew up to be a beautiful 18 year old girl. Err..why not 16? If 16, the ministry of women and child development could come barging into my place for what Cylinderella is going to be portrayed as. She was much more beautiful than any of her sisters which is kind of obvious for a protagonist but needs a mention.

Everyday she had to work like a slave from making the idlis in the morning to washing clothes at night. Life was very miserable for her and she sat near the gas stove everyday talking to her dog which replied back ‘bow! bow!’ meaning cheer up! By the way, I hate CATs :D.

The sisters, including Cylinderella, eyed the neighbour boy named Ezhavarasan , nicknamed ‘Prince’. Prince went to a school that was considered posh in their locality. Yes, he was still in school because he failed twice. Every morning, he took his blue cycle and rode off to school. The sisters deliberately sat in the veranda to watch him go while Cylinderella peeped from the kitchen.

It was once that he showed off by performing a stunt and broke his front two teeth. That became his mark of heroism and hence the sex appeal.

One day, Prince was throwing a party because he passed his twelfth standard. His house was decorated in ribbons, banners and banana plantain. Everyone was invited including the step sisters. They assumed that Cylindrella was not invited and asked her scrub the floor and put kolam in the front. Her step sisters dressed in blue and red half sarees and the flowers in the head could make anyone faint. In literal sense.

When they left for the party, she cried alone and suddenly an old lady with wings appeared.
“Who are you?”, she asked looking amazed. The old ladie’s mouth was red because of paan and she smiled a toothless smile .
“I am mother fairy”, she said
“Mother? you mean grandmother?”, Cylinderella asked.
“How dare you?!!”, shouted fairy pointing a old stick at Cylinderella’s nose. “Maybe, olay ageing cream doesn’t work on fairies and works only on Sushmith sen”.

“Don’t worry fairy. But why are you here?”, asked Cylindrella.
“Don’t you know how the story goes? Do you read books or not?!”, growled grandmother fairy.

“Oh! Wait! I will bring the pumpkin”. Cylinderella ran to the kitchen and brought in the biggest pumpkin she could find.
Grandmother fairy prayed, raised her wand and swoosh!!
Voila!! Pumpkin halwa was steaming hot in front of them.

“What is this?!!”, Cylinderella asked quite annoyed.
“What else do you expect me to make out of this pumpkin? This is one of my favourites, you know”, replied fairy examining her wand.
“But fairy, I want to go to prince’s party and I don’t have a transport or decent dress to wear”, Cylinderella explained.

“Sheesh! What kind of female are you? Steal one of your sister’s dresses and walk to his place. He is your neighbour, incase you forgot”.

Cylinderella was thankful for the idea and grabbed on a dress and wore her best. She wore matching clips on her head and examined herself in the mirror. She looked beautiful. She thanked the grand mother fairy.

“Just a warning, be back by 9”, advised the fairy.
“Why?”
“Because I go blind after that. So, make sure you come by 9”.

Cylinderella agreed and went to the party.

Prince was amazed to see a new girl . It was rare sight to see girls with good sense of dressing in the hall. So, he danced with her. All night, he pulled up his dhothi and did kuthu dance. Cylindrella giggled and enjoyed herself.

The clock stroke 9 and Cylinderella took on to her heels. Prince kept calling out to her but she didn’t turn back. One of the clips dropped near the door and prince picked it.

Next day , both, Prince and Cylindrella were sad. Prince was determined to find the new girl and so, he took the clip and tried it on every girl’s head. It was not a great feat as only very very few of them were good looking. He tried it on the step sisters and it fitted one of them perfectly.
“Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh..Princeeee…”, cried one of the sisters with dreamy eyes.

Hello ! wait! This is not how the story ends!

Prince fought his way to the kitchen where Cylindrella had been waiting for him and he put the clip on her head.

“I always knew it was you”, said Prince
“Is it?”, gleamed Cylindrella
“Who else in our neighbourhood uses jasmine oil on their head? The clip smelt of jasmine”

With teary eyes , she hugged him. They married and lived happily ever after.

Wait!

During their first child:

“She is so beautiful”, said Cylindrella hugging the baby.
“Yes, she is”, said prince.

“Sir, LIC agency has come”, said the maid servant.
“Wow!! After so many days!! She is very lucky for us. Let us christen her Lickella!!”

“That sounds bad”
“Ya! I know. Let us name her something else”

And it continues…

Yawned? I warned you.

The war

2010-05-06T09:44:00.000-07:00

“The skies saved us last time. Lord had shown mercy”, General Lysander thought looking at the calm blue cloudless sky. “Let my folks men not starve”, he prayed as he examined his fellow Spartans working.

The ship cut through the waves ferociously leaving behind enormous delicate white foam. Each battle of Spartans against the Athens told a different story; of destruction and starvation. The wars were savage, brutal and with verge of enmity. Nobody was evil in a war; the war as such was evil enticing people to do their worst.

Spartan’s last battle was a near death experience and they had to flee. They had lost 70 ships and most of the crew men were stranded. Mercy was shown when the weather turned sour and Athens could not attack them.General had heard that Athens had turned against their naval commanders executing six of them without a second thought. War makes anyone either a hero or a murderer.“My men and I are not heartless”, he thought, “a situation makes us so”.

They had to fight again; defeat or victory was not in their hands but they had to believe. They had to end what they had started.Standing tall at the end of the ship, dressed in golden armour that reflected the sunlight, general looked like a king. He knew battles are fought and won not with man power but intellectual. And he was gifted with it in surplus. He had befriended Cyrus and his strength grew in manifolds.

Everything had a convergence and when that was destroyed, half the battle could be considered victory. He was going to attack Hellensport which was the grain area of the Athens. Poverty and starvation would be the result but choice was minimal.

“Είναι έτοιμη με δυνάμεις* ” .The highest officer in command acknowledged it.‘

Men fight to experience death; to find what hunger is all about’, he thought as he wore his war clothes and shield. Everyone was working as if they were leading the army.

The uneventful journey continued for 7 nights but their spirit was not dampened.

The ships hit the shore on the eighth day. In an enemy land, it was danger that waited but today only silence did. The crew moved in groups and cautious with each step. The dawn was to break in few minutes while the crew waited behind the cliff till they could see each other’s face.

He, commander of Athens, strode towards the sea with such arrogance and majestic justifying the position he held. ‘Everyone walks like that in his land’, thought Lysander, ‘only to find that it may not belong to him the next day’. He was followed by two of the fellow citizens; malnutritioned and completely ignored. They carried his clothes and armour. The sword was hung around his hip. ‘Careful person’, noted Lysander.

Lysander had to start as his men waited for him. With a short prayer on his lips , he strode forward looking only at the commander. He bellowed to bring in the fury in him. He had to take back what belonged truly to them.

Lysander was impressed with the way Athenian commander drew out the sword almost immediately. The commander was on his heels and stood waiting for him. In his last step, Lysander jumped and the swords of the two enemies met to write a history.Lysander was blinded by anger and the only thing he sought out for was revenge. He could not see what was beyond that. With every acquaintance of the sword, power was less but the belief was more. Athenian commander was an animal and fought with power and no brain.Lysander was hurt physically, only physically but strength within him grew. His men still waited for their leader to finish the commander. With one stroke that came suddenly and accurate, he beheaded the Athenian commander.He raised his sword that had glistened in the light but now covered with blood.

With fury, he shouted “πολέμου μόνο άρχισε “. War just began.

* be ready with forces

Maapillai, mami and filter kaapi

2010-05-05T08:56:00.000-07:00

“Hello madam!”, Sriram’s voice sounded husky over the phone.
“Her name is Meena and she is a 2009 pass out”, I replied back curtly.
“What??!”, he asked, genuinely confused.
“You usually call when a new girl enters our ODC, so I assumed…..”, I was grinning sheepishly.
He was amused and I knew this was going to be the news of the day. By lunch, it would reach faster than our Indi café services. Who in the right mind said girls conveyed messages faster?
“PM came to my cubicle now. He asked me if I was ok with travelling abroad”, he explained yawning. Guess, trying to show off like it is not a big deal.
“Hmmmm..that doesn’t convey anything”.
“I know. Was just updating you. Okies, I am going for coffee. Catch you later”. He hung up.
I was wondering if Sriram had a chance of an onsite opportunity. The competition in the team was very tough and everyone had visas.
As I was wondering about this, suddenly everyone started clapping; including Venkat who all this while was sitting glued the PC.
“A tribute to Subha’s intelligence!! She gives valuable information even without being asked”,shouted Sriram raising his hand as a sign of triumph.
“You have any clue why you are clapping?”, I asked Venkat.
“No!”, he replied even without looking in my direction and started clapping with such vigour that his spectacles fell on the ground. I slumped into my chair. ‘I under-estimated Sriram’.

4 days later,

I was adjusting my bangle when ‘plonk!’ someone hit my head. I turned to see Sriram dressed in light blue shervani and worst, looking very comfortable unlike me, who was clad in the most colourful saree that even Jyothika dared to advertise. “You look beautiful!”, he said and colouremerged on my cheeks. Even before I could acknowledge his compliment, I heard my sister say thanks. Sriram gave his award winning grin looking at her and colour returned on my cheeks-blood red fury and embarrassment.
“Rammmmm…!!”, his mother called out from the other side of the marriage hall and our hero rolled his eyes . She was dressed grander than the bride and strode with such an elegance that added more ‘grandness’ to the silk saree. The sound of mirudhangam seemed to complement the scene and was like the background music.
“Sasi aunty is looking for you. She says she wants to meet you. She saw you when you were just 5 and it has been a very long time”.
Sriram didn’t say anything and searched for Sasi aunty in the crowd. His mom turned towards me scanning from top to bottom.
“Did Ram tell you about his onsite offer?”, she asked like it wasa general knowledge question.
“What onsite?”, I asked perplexed and looked at him. He just shrugged his shoulders.
“You don’t know va?”, she questioned like I didn’t what came after A in the English alphabet. “Ram is going to US in few weeks. His Visa is under process”.
I was annoyed that I didn’t know and made sure not tell him anything in future. “He just told me that his PM asked if he was willing to travel outside country”
“Yes ..yes!! that only”, she said. “It means he will go to US soon. His clients are in Houston . So,my son is going there pretty soon.
“What?! Oh..but..I mean..his PM just asked”.
Aunty glared at me and deferred her look for some time. “You are just jealous that both of you joined company at the same time and he is the one going”, she plainly accused and left the place before I could say something.
“Don’t give me that look. I am not responsible for that”, he gave an innocent look.

Sasi aunty came in with full enthusiasm. There was so much rose powder on her face that could paint the whole marriage hall pink. Her daughter trotted behind her and she could paint the guest rooms.
“Ramuuu!! You have grown so much!! And how thin you have become!! Don’t you eat well??”
I noticed Sriram tuck in his belly as she said that.
“I heard you were going to US. Nice ! All my brothers and their sons are there only. You can ask any help from them .”
Sriram just smiled as she went on with her blabbing.
“Hey, meet Shruthi. She will be finishing college this year. She wants to go to US too!”.She held her daughter’s hand like it was made of diamonds.
Sriram was as astounded as I was at the statement and I was enjoying this.
“She knows to cook and sing”, she went on while I was imagining just that – Shruthi singing while cooking and feeding Sriram like in Tamil movies. I laughed. A bit loud, I guess.
Sasi aunty gave me that disgusted look again. I wondered what it was with women and their expressions. It seemed to come with the age.“Who is she?”, she asked looking at me. If looks could kill, I would have been dead then.
“My colleague, aunty, and she is related to the guy’s side”, Sriram explained.
“I have heard many of these corporate stories! Marrying their own colleague! What a disgusting thing! You better be careful Ramu. My daughter is not like them”, she said in a proud tone.
I took a deep breath as she left the place.
“Are you not too young?”, I asked.
He gave a blank expression.
“For marriage?”, I asked again.
He just laughed . “It is like the movie ticket. Advance booking , you see”.
“Crap!”, I retorted back.
“You are just jealous!”, he claimed giving an expression just as his mother did.

An hour later,

“Hey Sri! Why is that I have a feeling that all your family folks are staring at me?”
“Cough cough..actually they are.”, he said looking somewhere else.
“What??! Why??”
“Because I told them that I was in love with you and going to marry you”, he explained while fumbling with his dress.
I stood frozen in the place and found my head spinning . “That is an indecent proposal!!”, I screamed.
“Hey, my would-be shouldn’t shout at me like that”, he said.
“Idiot! You are committed to someone else. Dont you realize that?”, I screamed again.
“So what?”, he asked. “That can be sorted out later. This is for time being”.
“Time being?? What do you mean? Wait wait! Is it because you didn’t want to be caught with the rose powder? Escaping from Sasi aunty, is it?”
Sriram smiled agreeing to every word.
“You are completely out of your mind ! Seriously! “, I said laughing at his expression and admiring his knack of managing the situation. “Your mother would have been hysterical!”
“Ya ya! She actually didn’t like it either”
“So what did you tell her?”, I asked out of curiosity.
“I just asked her one thing- Subhashree or Vellakari?”, he said in a low voice.
I laughed loud.

Sasi aunty came to us with her ‘looks could kill’ expression.
“Ram! You are just like others. All spoilt and bad. Marrying your own colleague……”.
She was stopped by Sriram’s mothers who came to save me. I didn’t know what to say.
“What Sasi are you talking? My daughter in law is going to IIM next year”, she said adjusting her saree.
“IIM..who?”, I looked around, “me?..how?..”
Sriram’s mother put her finger on the lips and I became quiet. Sasi aunty looked at three of us and left the place.
“I am going to IIM?? I am just giving CAT this year!!”, I explained with pauses.
“Yes ..yes!! that only”, she said. “It means you will go to IIM soon.”
Sriram laughed his head off while his mother looked at him like she was looking at an extinct species in a zoo.
I pulled up my saree slightly and ran for my life!

Nerd-->dude!

2010-05-01T07:22:00.000-07:00

In our lifetime, some people involuntarily (or voluntarily) become the outcast. No, not in the literal terms of the caste driven community of ours but the way we just shrug away some people for them not being like us.

Since our petty school days to the days of cubicle, we have simply disregarded one type of genre- the nerds. In our native language-the pazhams, thaiyar sadams and so on. As I say the word 'nerd' , a bi-spectacle hyper tension figure with lean long hands and running nose is what comes to my mind. Apparently, thanks to cartoon network for portraying them that way. I remember from my school days; we looked at the first benchers as if they had just swallowed a giant squid and ran the opposite direction. They were never considered our type and spoke a language, like an esoteric group, which was few physics and chemistry words strung together. They had a special aura around them that made you feel very small for the knowledge and you begin to curse the creator for giving you minuscule amount of brain when compared to them. Thus, the distance between two extreme species of same clan was vast.

Theory of cyclic human nature is prevalent .If a person had looks,he had no brains and vice verse. The combination of both was deathly fatal and can be major 'axe' effect. Nerds were never known for looks. To be precise, they were never looked at twice. Buried behind books and laptops, you remember their hairstyle more than anything. It was obvious, they never had time to talk and never had time for girls. Lets say, they did meet a girl who supposedly should have been his partner in lab or a neighbour who borrowed all his notes, the conversation starter would be " Have you looked at the kerbs cycle?" or "In which region does the crystal oscillator work?" making the woman take on her heels and ending the conversation even before it started.

It was not because they did know what to talk to woman but the question was "how". The girl who they have spoken to and moved around first would eventually become their other half later in their lives. They could handle the world's sophisticated code and use the latest technology like breeze but never figure what to say to the fairer sex.

Time goes on and they keep making friends by helping others. The reason they are never forgotten and always liked but never admitted in a gang.

The universal truth is going to be catastrophe- everyone admires a nerd . Even if they are the most ridiculed person, they have always managed to be the centre of attraction ; be it at the international conference of worldly knowledge or the among the ragging seniors in the hostel rooms. They have always been soft natured who spoke very less and low and attached many 'thank you', 'please' and 'thanks for your time'. This is why most of them grow to become what is known to as perfect gentlemen.

Like a pupae to butterfly is how I would describe their looks to be. Considering the fact that we never looked at them when they were young, we wonder what an amazing person they have become as they have grown up. With extravagant knowledge and sophisticated speech, we , girls begin to enjoy their follies and call it 'cute!'. They begin to impress us without a slightest effort; natural charmers I say.

In all, nerd turns out to be a dude you always have known and loved.

Dedicated to all the nerdy guys I have known :) Perfect gentlemen :)

Price to pay

2010-04-29T08:13:00.000-07:00

Olivia opened the carton of orange juice which was one of things she did every morning. Nothing energized her like the sour tingling taste of the fruit. She settled on the chair which was just few feet away from the bed. She smiled at Nathan’s innocent face that was in deep slumber oblivious to the admiration. She wondered how this sweet cute face could cheat on his wife. Nathan was married for three years to Meghna ; a well read engineer from Bangalore. They had known each other in the office and were engaged a year after their acquaintance. One year after their marriage, things went wary and the couple fought every night. This led Nathan to visit the city night clubs and bars and it was during one such occasion that he had met Olivia.
Olivia was just irresistible. With a slim figure that seemed straight out of Victoria’s model agency and independency that attracted most men. She never had a permanent job and never felt the need for it. Every night she frequented the bars and moved with rich men. Nathan was not her type; the reason she was attracted to him. It was one night when Nathan drank away his grief and sorrow in a corner where she met him by accident. On one look, she could tell that he was couple of years younger than her. Nathan was dressed in business suit and seemed to be out of place. She started a conversation which she had never done with anyone else and Nathan just vented out. She was not listening completely; she was admiring his innocent face and the voice that choked between sentences. He was drunk foolishly and she had to help him. She almost carried him to her room and the fateful night became a routine.

Meghna dried her hands in the saree pallu. She was mentally frozen and carried out the chores mostly out of habit. The work in the office took away most of her energy but gave the satisfaction. Also, it distracted her from thinking of what her husband was doing. Meghna was aware of where Nathan went every night although he excused himself with office work. When she first heard about it, she didn’t believe it. As a matter of fact, she didn’t want to believe it; until she had followed him one night. She had seen Nathan go into a bar. She didn’t mind his drinking habits but when she saw him intimate with another female, she just flared up. She moved out of the bar and never spoke to him after that. Nathan did not seem to mind and the distance between them grew more.
Meghna knew they were never going to be together again and decided to file a divorce against him. She was quite sure Nathan would approve of the same. Fate had a mind of its own. It was on the way to the lawyer that she fainted at the lawyer’s office and was taken to a local hospital where the doctors declared that she was pregnant.
Meghna was caught in a dilemma ; she wanted a child and at the same time end it with Nathan. She felt he had cheated her and put her in the situation in which was caught now. The fury grew and it was mixed with sadness. She had never felt more hurt in her life. She wanted to end it all.

Nathan snored gently and changed his position. Olivia sighed and moved to empty the glass in the sink. She wanted to sit there all day watching him but he had to go home. He had to do go to his “first” home where his so-called “other half” lived. Olivia settled next to him on bed and ran her fingers through his hair. He groaned and grumbled something. She shook him gently like she was waking a kid. He suddenly opened his eyes and grinned at her. He took a glance at his watch and sighed. He had to go home now and get ready for office. He got up lazily, kissed Olivia and made his way to the bathroom. Olivia lay on the bed for another fifteen minutes. She missed him already.

Meghna stared at the contents of the bottle that was clutched in her hands. The online search had confirmed an instant death when taken whole at a time. She knew she couldn’t do it and he didn’t deserve this but the evil side of her said he deserved the pain; the pain he had given her. This would be for her child. She didn’t want her child to know what his father was like. Her hands trembled and she poured the contents into the upma she had prepared for him. She was lost in her thoughts.

Olivia stood on the porch as she saw Nathan drive. It was still dark outside and he always left very early to avoid other people recognizing him. She had a mild headache and decided to sleep as there was nothing much to do. She craved for Nathan and had let him know many times. She wanted to marry him which was so unusual of her nature. She never approved of marriages but he had made her weak. She wanted him forever. She wanted him to divorce Meghna and marry her. She was going to persuade him somehow. But for now, she wanted to get rid of the headache.
Meghna watched Nathan eat his favourite upma. Not a word was spoken. This time, Meghna found the silence too obvious. She kind of choked at what she was doing. Nathan didn’t leave a peck on the plate. “It tastes too good”, he told her.
It was sudden for Meghna and she found all the energy draining out. There was guilt and sadness that seemed to fight each other. She told herself that she had committed a grave mistake. Nathan had even smiled when he said that .An unknown bond existed between them even though no words were spoken. The love had not faded. Her hands shivered. She reached out for the telephone. Nathan collapsed near the wash basin.
4 hours later, at City hospital
Meghna watched her husband from outside the ICU. Doctors had just told her that he was poisoned and she tried to give a genuine expression of being shocked. She was very glad that her husband was better. She knew she could never forgive herself if he had died. She needed to talk to him. She waited for him to get better and out of the hospital.

Olivia looked like she was in deep sleep. In fact, endless sleep. One of the police men felt her pulse and confirmed their doubts. The milk man had come early morning and found that the lady of the house was not willing to open the door. He sensed something wrong when the mobile phone was ringing continuously. He called out for the neighbours.
The headlines next day informed the death of a middle aged lady in her apartment. The story went on to explain that she seemed to have been poisoned and it was mixed with the orange juice that she had consumed early morning. The police suspected a murder and wondered who could have poisoned a lady who lived all alone.

Forgotten Milestone

2010-04-18T01:07:00.000-07:00

It was 1940, 2nd of May in France and the temperature outside was mild. The atmosphere inside the small wooden army cabin that was stationed at the border was the same .Lieutenant Colonel Rafe licked his lips. He bent upon a brown tattered map of France that contained the intricate routes. Smoke from cigar disturbed his view; the smoker was Colonel Pervez. Man of large frame in his late forties with well trimmed moustache, just smiled. “Nothing tastes like these cigars, not even woman’s lipstick”, he claimed. On the contrary, Rafe was thin and pale with stern quick eyes that seemed to follow every detail. Officers feared Pervez’s brawn while they were admired Rafe’s intellect.

“I fear the number of our men we have sent to confront in this sector”, Rafe pointed out to his senior. Pervez gave a sad look as if departing from his cigar meant his death. “You worry too much, dear Lieutenant. Forty is not a small number for the place. Germans would never take that route as the terrain is not very convenient”.

Rafe was not convinced because Pervez was prone to make mistakes and ‘convenience’ was never in an army dictionary. He studied the map carefully and looked for signs of danger. Had he not been busy with other sectors, he would have checked the troop that was sent.

“If German’s enter through the mainline, we can attack them from all the three ends but if they take this route, we would lose all forty men”, Rafe claimed, more to himself. “Losing forty men is not a big deal, Rafe, especially in an enemy confront. It is natural.”, Pervez said his usual lethargic tone. Being a man of practicality, Rafe knew it was true but that was not what they were assigned to do-lose men foolishly. Planning was never easy; it was semi barbaric and sentimental at the same time. Most of the men who came into army had families.

“Did you take a look at the troop at least?”, Rafe questioned Pervez. “Yes yes. Inspected last night .All good and patriotic”, claimed Pervez. Rafe knew it was not true. The bottles of alcohol stacked in the corner spoke of a different story. “Why do you worry about them so much?”, asked Pervez. Rafe was provoked but he maintained his calm. “Men come to serve our country and they have families! Don’t you realize that? They shouldn’t lose their lives just because their seniors committed a grave mistake of not looking over things. Their life is our responsibilty”. Pervez rolled his eyes and seemed not bothered. The concept of family never appealed him. He was quite content with all the women he went out with frequently but never fell in love with any of them. According to him, men in armies did not need families, just as Rafe and he had chosen not to marry. Rafe, because he respected them and had decided to marry the one he loved. To fall in love was not possible for a man in his position.

A muffled sound came over the receiver that was placed in the far end of the cabin. Rafe moved towards it to adjust so that it can capture the signal. The cabin creaked as Rafe made movements. “Colonel Colonel! Do you read me?” The voice broke over the receiver.
“This is Lieutenant here. What is it, officer?”, Rafe replied recognizing the voice of the officer.

The signal was strong and so the voice was very clear.
“The planning was wrong, Sir.German’s took the Route A.”, explained the officer, sounding quite alarmed and nervous.

Rafe froze in his place. It was anticipated but it seemed to answer his worst fears. “Officer, can we have the other two troops back to the area?”, asked Rafe as he had planned out.
“Yes Sir, we could but we lost all forty people who were supposed to tackle there. It was a brutal fight and much more than what we expected of them. Germans attacked from three ends. The enemy almost lost out too; with only few of them left out now. We can handle them. Our troop was very skilled but unfortunate”.

Rafe choked while Pervez just stared at the receiver. Rafe was disgusted with himself. Disgusted for trusting Pervez on this.
“Sir?”, officer called out.
“Yes, I am here”, answered Rafe.
“Didn’t you find it hard to send them to fight, Sir? Should have looked into it one more time. You could have been more careful about the number sent to such a dangerous zone”
Rafe was stunned by such an accusation and looked quite helpless. “Why do you say that , officer?”
“Were you not aware that all the forty people sent to fight were women?!?!”, officer asked in a stern voice.

Rafe simply stared at the receiver. He could feel Pervez’s hand trembling over his shoulders.

Next day, the head office received a resignation letter. It was signed by Lieutenant Colonel of French Sector-A army, Rafe Van.

Unusual II

2010-04-07T10:52:00.000-07:00

I lie bruised, burnt ; my beloved,
Journey trancending endless.
I trace my steps to see the beginning,
It seems far beyond levels.
I trusted thyself to make the start,
Now, I trust thyself to end it all.

Appa and Subha - 3

2010-03-23T09:30:00.000-07:00

Musings of dad and daughter

Me: What to do if you come across an "unreasonable" person ?
Dad: Ignore. Keep silent.
Me: What if they are mad? shout and throw tantrums?
Dad: hmmmm..
Me: It is very irritating. And I happen to meet one everyday
Dad: hmmmmm...
Me: Will you stop your hmmmm hmmm??? I am .......
(silence)

Me: Dad!!!Why are you silent?

Appa and Subha - 2

2010-03-16T09:02:00.001-07:00

Musings of dad and daughter .

Me: "Can adversity strike twice in anyone's life? I am totally frustrated"

Dad:(not looking up from his newspaper) Well..it did in my life. I had your sister after you.

Appa and Subha - 1

2010-03-16T08:58:00.000-07:00

Musings of dad and daughter.

Dad: "What are you smiling at?"

Me: I am looking at the old photos. Look at the weird dress and wide smiles. Look at my haircut.I cant believe I wore all that.I seem mad. In ten years of span, I have changed so much."

Dad: "Really?"

Then and Now

2010-03-14T01:44:00.000-08:00

Five years ago:

I yawned and read the contents at the same time. My mind was blocked and I turned to see what my friend was doing. She had made herself comfortable on the bed and looked dreamily at the book that lay in front of her.
"What you doing?", I asked , breaking the silence.
"Was just thinking", she replied.
"What??", I asked quite annoyed.
"Yesterday my senior sent photos of herself . Remember the one doing M.S. at Chicago? The photos and place were awesome . Wondering if we would go there any time in our lives", she replied dreamily.
"Ya!! U.S. must be fun. No rules and total independence. Teaching is good too. All practical and less theoretical!!" I answered like I have visited U.S. a million times.
"We should go there once Subha!!", she exclaimed.
Definitely!! US is the place to be!!
And we made action like plane taking off.

A month ago,
Me:"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii...eppadi irruka??" (Hi, How are you?)
Her:"Irrukaen" (Doing ok, not very optimistic)
Me: "How is Houston treating you?"
Her: "ok!"
Me: "Must be fun le?"
Her:" No, feeling very lonely. Just occupying myself so much. Nothing great here."
Me:"Oh..."
Her: Miss you Subha. Miss the time we studied together. Miss everyone there. Miss having people I know around. Miss the crap we did. Miss everything :("

I choked.

Rift that stayed..

2010-01-30T08:56:00.000-08:00

Today, 6: 36 p.m.

They were waiting for her signal.It would be given any moment. The position was not comfortable but nobody complained.This was to be their last night.At least, that is what it seemed like.The signal came; it was just a movement of her hand that said ‘move forward’.The four men lurked in a corner adjusted their gun and obeyed her.

27 years ago,

‘Shalu!We have a new neighbour!’, Mrs.Devaki shouted. Shalini was curious but not very happy.A new neighbour would mean more competition, that is, if they had any kid. Her woes were answered. They had a girl of her own age,five years and she was to join her school. Even without seeing her, she already began to loathe the new neighbour girl.

Today,6:39 p.m.

The men moved slowly towards the house. It was very cold. The chillness didn’t bother them but the silence did.They had an eye on their captain.She moved with them.She put her hand on the lips indicating them to be silent.Silence added to already silent ambience.

22 years ago,

‘Don’t compare me with her’,Shalini shouted.”I was not exactly comparing but quoting the facts”, her father exclaimed. Her father was a typical army man and demanded perfection in everything he did. This included meticulous bringing up of his daughter. He wanted the best for his daughter and demanded the best from her. “I could compare you with her father. He has less experience but more grades than you!”, she retorted back and stormed out of the place.She knew her father must have been hurt by her words but didn’t care. He compared her with the neighbour girl. She loathed her day by day.

Today,6:42 p.m.

One of the men looked at the watch. Just few minutes had passed but seemed like hours. The wait was frustrating but they had been anticipating for this moment for three months. The evidence was strong against the suspect but they were not able to do anything till today. Their captain had worked hard for this case. Exceptionally hard. The reason they didn’t want to fail her today.

13 years ago,

Shalini dropped on the bed and began to cry.She cried her heart out. She had never trusted and liked anyone as she did Ravi. She thought he was hers.Until today. She didn’t know of his intentions. They were best friends since school days. Now, went to the same college.She didn’t know why she was crying;was it because he was not hers or because she was rejected. Ravi had told her that he liked her neighbour girl.She loathed her heart out.She cried the whole night.

Today, 6:46 p.m.,

They were not alone. Four more men were on the other side.Every sense was on alert. The final signal would be given any time.They looked at her. Her face concentrated on the door.She gave the final forward signal.They charged.

11 years ago,

“Dad, I want to go to army.Just like you”, Shalini claimed. Father looked at her; perplexed and astonished. “ Why the sudden plan? Just because you failed a couple of MBA exams doesn’t mean that your life has ended”, he explained. “Why do you think of it that way? I did want to do other things but doesn’t mean I didn’t like army. I wish to go to army. You have to help me”, she said. Her father smiled. “Hope you never regret this decision”, he said. She knew she would never regret anything in life again. She tried to forget Ravi but his memories kept coming back. She had to move out of this place. Somehow. She had to stop dreaming about him. She had to forget that he and the neighbour girl were going to get married in a week’s time.

2 years ago

The report lay in front of her. She knew the contents. She knew her past would come before her and people she had known will be involved. She had to make a decision . To take the case or not was in her hands. She had thought a lot. She opened the file.

Today 6:47

They followed her. She opened the door and signalled a thumbs up. They moved inside. It was dark all over the place.All that could be heard was the floor creaking. The suspect must be here somewhere. They put on their flashes.The captain signalled them to three different directions and she chose to go alone in one direction. The mere presence of the other was the comfort but the captain was alone. They had to appreciate her. The whole place was silent.Adding to the eerie. They were anticipating something to pounce in them. They moved in circles.

Suddenly,they heard bullet sounds from upstairs. It was the direction their captain had chosen. They ran up hoping nothing had happened to their captain.They found her in a dark corner at the end of the passage. Her face gleamed with victory. They knew she had done it. They moved into the room and saw the face of the culprit. He looked innocent enough.There was another dead body next to it. One that of a female.She must have come to save her husband and ended up as a victim too.They heard someone crying and searched the room with their flash lights. A child was sitting in the corner, frightened of the commotion. Their captain went near the child and hugged . She looked into the child’s eyes. The men didn’t understand what she said but were sure she claimed something like “She has Ravi’s eyes”.

Unusual I

2010-01-23T09:31:00.000-08:00

World is like an Olympic stadium. You have three kinds of people-the winners, runners and spectators. The winners achieve what they had dreamt and worked for. Runners try to follow the winners. But the power to criticize lies with the spectators. In the end, they are nothing but noise makers.

The Sacred Thread

2009-12-29T08:41:00.000-08:00

The door creaked when it was opened. Kannan grumbled under his breath. A usual habit in his not so assuring hectic schedule. He adjusted the laptop bag on his shoulders and removed his shoes. He saw another pair lying carelessly on the floor. 'Badri is home already', he noted.

He went straight to the bedroom and saw Badri on the bed-hair disheveled, torn socks and still in his formals. Kannan's temper aroused, but, he didn’t do anything. Badri was not in the state that he could reason out.

Kannan and Badri worked together in the same office and outside their respective hometown. Two years ago, they had rented a house near their workplace. Since then, they had been together. Kannan had been very choosy about his roommate. He was particular that the person be a vegetarian. Badri was an obvious choice.

Kannan placed his bag near the bed. He smelt alcohol. If it were two years ago, he would have complained and thrown tantrums but being with a roommate for a long time teaches you many things. He shoved away the Vishnu Sahasranamam that lay on his table into the draw. It was in Sanskrit and he couldn’t make much out of it. But he never admitted that for it might be against their principles. He wondered if Badri even knew its existence.

Kannan was not a religion fanatic but there were certain things that he could never compromise in his life-his habits and beliefs. And it was a blow when he found Badri loved Non vegetarian food and consumed alcohol. He had tried reasoning out many times, took examples from real life and the Vedas, but nothing had changed Badri. He gave it up and chose to ignore him. It is hard when it is your roommate.

"Kanna..Is it you?", Badri asked, suddenly waking up dazed.

He didn’t bother to reply."Where is the envelope that I had kept on this table?"

Badri sat on the bed and thought for some time. "Oh! The one you forgot to take with you in the morning? I posted it. You said the application closes by weekend."

Kannan looked relieved."Thanks", he replied and moved to kitchen. The place was a mess. The Maggie packets were scattered on the floor. He sighed and started cleaning the place.

"Kannaaaaaaaaaa...one coffee for me too", Badri shouted from the room.' I am not your servant', he thought. He poured coffee into two different glasses-traditional 'tumbler' for himself and into a glass for Badri.

Badri entered the kitchen. "I paid the internet bill da", he said and moved into the room again. Badri never asked for share of money. Kannan framed him as spoilt brat.

"How is your sister? Recovering from Typhoid?", Badri asked."She is fine", was his reply. Badri remembered every member of his family. He had been to his native many times and acted so well that Kannan's parents had no complains. In fact, they believed it was a blessing to have Badri as their son's roommate.

Kannan, on the contrary, had no idea about Badri’s family. He never bothered himself with these kinds of issue. Badri switched on the music system and increased its volume to the maximum. He was annoyed again. Every habit of his annoyed him. He had wanted to change his place many times but when you are in a metro city, things are tougher. Kannan had to tolerate Badri.

There was a sudden knock on the door. 'Drat!his friends again', Kannan thought. Badri had friends visiting frequently, mostly drunkards, but Badri made sure that he had his parties only outside. It was because Kannan hated them.

It wasn’t Badri's friends, but their neighbour.

"Badri!Badri!Gas leak!!The other portion caught fire. Vacate the place fast!", the neighbour screamed.

Kannan stood frozen in place. He couldn’t move. He didn’t know how to react until he felt someone pulling him outside the door. Kanan followed as a puppy behind its master. He was not of conscious of the surroundings. While climbing down the stairs, he saw the fire blazing, eating away the portion of the building and moving towards their portion.

"Stay here Kanna, I will be back. Just stay here.", Badri said calmly. Kannan just nodded like he was listening to a speech. He stood as directed and watched Badri move into the fire. It was then he came in contact with the situation.

What the hell is Badri doing?. "Badriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii...Badriiiiiiiiiiii...daiiiiiiiii". Badri turned and gestured him to stay there in the place. Kannan was hit mentally. He didn’t know what he was doing there. He even forgot the way out. The heat was rising and the fire was just minutes away from him. "God save me. Do something. Just do something. Where did Badri go now?". He tried moving forward. The roof broke down. He jumped over it and jumped skipped the stairs. He could see nothing in front but he ran for his life. He jumped all over the rumbles. Everything seemed blank. He ran as far as his feet could take him.

Two days later

Kannan was aghast at what he was seeing. It was not 'what' but 'who'. The person lying on the hospital bed had skin burnt; everywhere from face to legs. But he was conscious.

"Badri, why did you go back?"

Badri smiled back. Or that is what it seemed like. "How could I leave the boy back there? He was crying. I heard him".

"Still......", Kannan could not say anything."I am sorry Badri. I was selfish then. Can I have your parent’s number? I have to inform them".

Badri smiled again. He was feeling drowsy."I have no one da".

Kannan was speechless. He just stared at Badri. He saw the sacred thread that was hung on the chair. The Bhagawad Gita ; the Vishnu Saharanamam ; the Vedas had not taught him well.

The journey

2009-12-23T07:10:00.000-08:00

Here is a poetry of a kind. What kind? That, even I am not sure. Wrote it for a friend who experienced a break up.(You see, I was doing this motivating part)

The storm brew, clouds grew darker,

Lost in the sound of thunder, vigorous gushes of air

A flash from above and raging waves below,

Nature had its way, left me stranded,

Caught between an urge to escape and will to stay.

Mind remembers everything in crisis,

Thoughts flow in string of odd despair,

‘All was well, life was lived’,

‘Everything tranquil in eyes of all’

‘But, why me?’

I sought for answers, for questions I never knew,

Tried to mend things that could never be brought together,

Heart knew one thing; this is not the place to be,

‘I want to flee. But, why me?’

Plans were laid, expectations were set,

Journey was perfect; I thought it to be,

All seemed well, or I was blind,

‘Whatever may be, but, why me?’

Odds were at ends, does life need a chance again?,

The seas,the skies and thunders, everything scares me,

I wished, I pleaded, I begged,

‘Alas!I ask the same, why me?’

Humanity is a mistake, I am one too,

Like everyone who took up the journey,

For, everyone dreamt the same dream,

‘In all of them, why me?’

I wait for the thunders to cease , I wait patiently,

I wonder if it would ever happen,

I moved in the labyrinth for answers,

Sought to the caves for clues,

Where was I at fault that you punish me,

‘Oh God, why me?’

A voice spoke, not from above,

Not from distant stars or heavens,

But one within me,

‘Journey is a stroll, until you believe,’

‘When fear hovers over faith, you are as good as dead’

‘Journey is not to be crossed, but experienced and learnt’,

‘It is not destination that matters, but each stride’

‘Face it , my boy! Like men of material have’

‘Live it up,my boy!To move or stay, choice is with you.’

P.S.; Excuse me, he liked it!

When girls play Counter Strike..

2009-12-09T08:22:00.000-08:00

Deepak:Eragon

Ron:Ron

Srinath: Illidian

Mayuri:mmm

Sharmi: Ellyse

Yours truly:Raven

And the game begins:

"Raven!!cool!! stay there! stay there!!guard that door", Ron shouted. My ears split.

"Aye Aye captain." I guarded the door.Obviously, the virtual door, waiting for the terrorists to enter.

"Shit man!Ron!the turn around! they might come that way!", yelled Illidian and I became deaf.

"Oh ya! mmm, go guard Raven's back. Possibility of them coming that way". As soon as he said this, three terrorists entered the door. I clenched my teeth and started shooting like they were really going to kill me. Suddenly I felt shots from behind.

"What the heck!!Did the terrorists kill mmm? Someone is shooting me.".

Ron glanced above the screen and saw mmm was still alive. "Hey mmm,whats happening. Are you not guarding Raven's back?

I turned around(obviously in the game) only to find mmm's gun pointing at my butt,ooopppss, guarding my back :(.

Oh meri Anarkali..

2009-11-19T07:41:00.000-08:00

I bought an Anarkali chudidar which cost me 2k ! Yes, I was out of my mind when I got it.

It looked like it has been woven during the era of mughals .Rich and traditional. I simply couldn't resist buying.

Yesterday, my friends and me had gone shopping together to buy a gift for a common friend. While selecting a saree, I happened to enlighten two of my guy friends on what exactly was an "Anarkali" chudidar.

"It right tight on the top and flows down at the bottom. Ones you see from old movies where girls dancing in darbar wear", I explained.

One of them got a fair idea while the other still looked perplexed.

"Very traditional wear da. All hindi movies. Come on..you would have seen one".

He still was confused. So, I looked around the shop and saw one of the mannequins wearing it.

"That one! that one!", I said excitedly.

My friend looked at it with interest.

"I have seen that! That's anarkali huh??. Isn't it similar to the gown that expected mother's wear?", he said.

I realised .Yes, I was out of my mind when I got it.

A review of the BPCL quiz we hosted (IQL team)

2009-11-14T20:12:00.000-08:00

Statutory Warning: If you have busy schedules or don’t appreciate humour of any form, I request you not to proceed. For rest, here is the review of the BPCL quiz that KN and me hosted(and backed up by Murthy).

Questions-Simple	8 * 5 rounds
Audience	132 + technicians
Host	2
Finalists	16
Fun	101%
Mistakes	Occasionally
Satisfaction	101%

The ingredients for a perfect quiz. Sometimes it is just not the questions.

Venue: Bharat Petroleum Corp Limited, Anna Nagar.

Occasion: Vigilance Awareness week.

The climate was gloomy but the enthusiastic level inside the auditorium wasn’t. At 10, KN and I were honoured and we clumsily accepted the bouquet offered. The speeches made by the imminent guests were short and sweet (or we dozed off). After all the formalities were done, the stage was set for prelims.

The chairs in the auditorium were arranged in sets of four (members per team) and everyone started discussing from the very first question. I conducted the prelims and made my usual mistake of giving away too many clues. The prelims round of 30 questions (that included 10 hard core BPCL questions) was done within the estimated time of 40 minutes. We had to put up a fight to get the answer sheets back from the participants.

There was a long gap of 2 hours between prelims and finals which gave us enough time for correction.

While correcting a particular question “….Instead,the street was named after Lord _______?” , everyone had written ridicule answers like Warren and Mountbatten . We laughed over it and it took us few minutes to realize that they understood the “Lord” to be the English designation rather than God. We had to appreciate their “out of box” thinking or make a mockery of our inability to think like the participants.

The correction was done in 45 minutes and we went to have our lunch. The menu was set for a king and they called it their “regular” lunch menu. We kept talking to participants to keep ourselves awake.

The finalists were cheered when their names were called out and the quiz began.

There was commotion and excitement from the word go. The audience was as thrilled as the finalists and displayed it by calling out KN’s name for every audience question. The rounds were quick and KN carried himself as professional as he could. There was a huge applause for the connect round making him proud and blush.

There was a close tie between two teams and the team-A who answered the last question correctly emerged as winners.

Winners:

I place : Mr.A .A . Prabhu Roy,Mr.V.S.Raghavan, Mr.Kani Amudhan,Mr.Nagarajan

II Place: Mr.Koshy Vargese, Mr.G.Ravichandran, Mr.Amit Kumar,Mr.L.Chandrasekaran

III Place:Mr.A.C.Iyer, Mr.Sethuraman,Mrs.Hema Malini, Mr.C.Joseph

IV Place: M/s Lakshmi, Mr.Mukesh .K. Singh, Mr.K.Sethuramalingam,Mr.M.Mohan

Yes, according to them, everyone is a winner.

After the prize distribution and thank you speeches, the entire auditorium was silent letting both of us to savour the experience of quizzing.

P.S.; Special thanks to Mr.Saieeji for letting us conduct this Quiz.

What? Is it me?

2009-10-22T08:51:00.000-07:00

I quite often read my own blog posts. I realised one unusual thing.

I have lost the sense of humour.

What? Is it me??

Blessing and bawling

2009-10-18T00:02:00.000-07:00

I fell at my mother's feet.

"Hope you get a good husband", she blessed.

I got up, glared and snapped "Cant you bless me with something like an MBA?"

"I couldn't think of anything at the moment" , she replied trying to look innocent. "Bull!", I growled and shook my head.

"Any way it is not wrong to bless you that way", She justified.

"But it is not what I want at the moment!", I growled again.

"You have been writing CAT year after year. And we have been patient enough", she said.

Very true. Apparently I am one of the very few lucky ones whose parents have let their daughters write CAT again. No, it is not about the exam ; it is about the time period. Two years after college is way too long according to Indian standards. And doing an MBA would take another toll of two years.

It is not pressure. It is irritating to keep in my mind that we don't have time.I don't blame my mother for this. It is the general trend and I have seen her being compelled by other mothers who have married off their daughters early or "at the budding age" to US mapallais.

Once at a jewellery house when we went to get gold coins for Lakshmi puja, a similar incident occurred.

She looked at all the gold stuff and said "Haan! I have to get you that and this..." and again the growling and cribbing started.

"Don't you ever think of anything else in life?", i asked her once.

"You two girls are my most precious things on earth. Don't I have the right to say and do good things for you?", she asked.

"But amma, 24 * 7 it is the same. Are you by any chance brain washing? It is only brain damaging!"

"You don't understand. You will when you cross my age", she said meekly.

Ah!another standard dialogue. It is not like I am hardly romantic or I am against marriages but our own ambitions can be given a thought.

On occasions like this I look upon my father for rescue.

On this particular day of blessing, he intervened too. "What is happening now?, he asked.

"Look at her, dad, again marriage talks", I tried to sound helpless.

"There is nothing wrong blessing her with good husband", my mom justified her point.

Dad looked at both of us and sighed. "Hmmmm...I wonder what the guy's mother is blessing him with. It is not a blessing but a curse for him only", he said and grinned.

I laughed and moved to him leaving behind mom to sulk to herself.

Sigh!

2009-10-17T23:50:00.000-07:00

I look at my blog. Nothing new and nothing useful.Just like my life.

Is it worth pushing yourself beyond capability and trusting the instinct every time?Is it necessary to tolerate things happening to you when the truth is slashed across your face and let you know that you cant do it?

On the whole, is it mandatory to do things that you hate just because your ego does not let you accept that you are incapable?

I rather not do a thing I hate but do hundred things I love. Maybe, the thing I hate is going to give me everything-secure future, happiness, pride and even make others happy. But at the end of the day, I just realize I have been cheating myself.

Is it of any use?

P.S.; Sorry for the dysfunctional post. Looks like I am turning pessimist now.

My tarot reading

2009-09-21T09:55:00.001-07:00

You are The Empress

Beauty, happiness, pleasure, success, luxury, dissipation.

The Empress is associated with Venus, the feminine planet, so it represents, beauty, charm, pleasure, luxury, and delight. You may be good at home decorating, art or anything to do with making things beautiful.

The Empress is a creator, be it creation of life, of romance, of art or business. While the Magician is the primal spark, the idea made real, and the High Priestess is the one who gives the idea a form, the Empress is the womb where it gestates and grows till it is ready to be born. This is why her symbol is Venus, goddess of beautiful things as well as love. Even so, the Empress is more Demeter, goddess of abundance, then sensual Venus. She is the giver of Earthly gifts, yet at the same time, she can, in anger withhold, as Demeter did when her daughter, Persephone, was kidnapped. In fury and grief, she kept the Earth barren till her child was returned to her.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Retrospection when you have committed a mistake

2009-09-14T08:16:00.000-07:00

I look back and see the evil me. I smile at my follies. I know I have committed things that were so unknown to others. The satan arose. I hurt and it hurt me. I hate the hatred that existed.I loved the love that was given.In the times that lie ahead, the darker side of life and me.I wish time flew and I erased the naked truth. I wish I knew what was I doing at the moment. I envisaged life as a destination not a path.A path with hurdles.I wish I fell again and again so that the pain would take away the pain.

Lessons of life taught the hard way. And it does hurt.

I ask..

2009-09-14T08:11:00.000-07:00

I ask for time to fly past,

I ask for forgiveness,

I ask for pain where it hurts the most,

I ask for words that were uttered,

I ask for people who cared,

I ask for love so rare,

I ask for reasons for stupidity,

I ask for destiny to take toll,

I ask for peace,

I ask for fruits for deeds,

I ask for decisions to be rectified,

I ask for another chance in life..

Time pass

2009-09-02T08:03:00.000-07:00

It was early in the morning and I was walking towards the bus stop. Lost in my own world, I came to a halt. I was little confused what stirred me; then I saw sparks from the transformer below which I stood.I trotted forward to a safe area and looked up. There was smoke coming from a particular spot of the transformer.Within seconds, something black whirled and fell on the ground.On closer look, I recognised a crow.Fried.

Namma Ooru T.Nagar

2009-08-30T08:34:00.000-07:00

Caution: If you know the place T.Nagar at Chennai, you will enjoy this. If not, you will get to know the place .

The symbol "P" of Pothys is like a light house.Yes, you can see it from all four corners of T.Nagar. So, in which direction will you head to when your friend says Pothys ?? That is T.Nagar for you.

The word to describe the place- confusion.

Your Rs.2500 leather bag is provoked by Rs.25 bag on street and it will be so identical that you would have forgotten in which hand you held the original. The roads are made into networks wherever possible that beats Japan roads hands down and in every nook and corner, you find shops that sell anything and everything and rates one-fourth the original.

A fly over was opened recently to reduce traffic but is far from it. The traffic still exists, now on the bridge itself.Underneath the fly over, you see human traffic(not trafficking, mind you) along with cows and dogs and you are not sure on whose foot(or paw) you stepped on. Vehicles are parked under the bridge such that you are perplexed whether the bridge stands due to the boulders or the vehicles.

People stop at every place and you suddenly find yourself not being able to move forward-why?because a couple have entangled not leaving each other and holding on to like crisis is nearing. The idea of romanticism in such place is something that leaves me in awe.

Everyone bargains at their loudest decibel so that it is heard by everyone. Probably, an idea of marketing. Here you find an amalgam of languages in one go; each shopkeeper addressing you guessing that you are from so an so place.

Most families in Chennai plan to go this place for a picnic. Good bargain I would say; complete package-you get what you need, get to window shop with no trouble, buy other things in cheaper rate and things to eat at every corner of the street.

Shopping in this place has its own pleasure.Couple of girls giggling at the earrings at a small roadside shop and boys hoping that the girls would finish with the shopping soon.At the end of the day, the experience would leave you amused and contented.

T.Nagar is a city in itself . Chennaites love this place and others who come here will learn to love it.

Bad hair day..

2009-08-09T08:38:00.000-07:00

There are times when you want to run away from the world. When you want to get invisible and slap some people. Wished that time flew faster. Hoped that you could predict the future.

Worst- when you are feeling all of that at one go :(.

I am. Now.

Hear ..hear..

2009-07-23T08:11:00.000-07:00

What do you expect to hear from others? My opinions on it.

Father : The exact opposite of what you claim. Whatever you say doesn't matter and it is absolute nonsense.

Mother: What father says but refined so that it favours you too. You are confused on whose side she is.

Sibling : Listens to your argument. Tries to make sense of it or shuts up. Mostly tries not to involve.

Friend : Says what you want to hear. Whether it is right or wrong doesn't matter.

Boy friend / Girl friend : Digs, asks more and listens patiently. Doesn't give opinion on the spot. Usually silent but makes a mental note of everything.

Cousin : Polished speech. You have no clue whether it is mockery or advice. You sense ignorance every time.

The so called 'Demi Gods' *

2009-07-23T07:47:00.001-07:00

* I removed the cobwebs. Both from the blog and my head :)

I sipped hard through the straw till the last contents of the glass made noise.

"Heard of Sarath Babu?", asked Bharath.My eyebrows shot up. Not again.

It was one of the Pagal guys meet at CCD and we were discussing arbit topics when one mentioned about the slum-dog-almost-millionaire.Sarath Babu, the guy from the slums who went on to study at BITS and even made through the most coveted IIM A. I have made him my icon and praised him enough at competitions and debates.But, I found restlessness discussing him again.It is true that you don't see someone like him everyday but what happens to people who achieve something similar or even more but are not spoken about at all.

I have a thought lingering in my mind. Does hard work become less when you are comparatively better off ? Does one get things easily if give they are given better opportunities?

To ask a simple question- would Sarath have made it to IIM or opened the food king catering if he was from a middle class family? The answer is dicey- could be a yes or a no.

The point I am trying to imply is that it is not one's status that pushes individual to do extra-ordinary things. It could be many factors- ambitions, need to prove or something else. I remember when my friend said that he was going to start his own business, others shooed it off saying his parents could compensate his losses and he has nothing to risk. I beg to differ here. I believe that everyone has a dream and while achieving it, they put in the same amount of effort and are willing to take risks.

The so called Demi Gods; they too deserve some praise because it is not their fault that they are better off.

Om Namo Narayanaya Namaha..

2009-05-23T21:52:00.000-07:00

First of all, titles can be abrupt , bad or even make you wonder what it has to do with the text. I have known to set up strange lines but it happens because I am clueless on how to start .

Forgive the dimwit.

Yesterday, after a long long long time, I happened to go to a temple with my family(to temple-weekly, with mom-occasionally, with family-hardly). So, it was kind of nice feeling yet strange and funny occasion.

Why strange and funny?- read on.

"Take the lamp on the right", my mom ushered while i was still scanning at the numerous lamps that were laid over a large steel table with newspaper on.I couldn't decide and so picked something in random.I walked slowly into the temple such that it gave an illusion there was going to be a nuclear holocaust nearby.

"There is a big lamp. Lit yours there. Do not lit from other people's lamp".I could hear my mothers commanding voice from behind. I was shocked to see the big lamp. Technically, it was not a lamp but blazing fire that grew an inch every minute. Probably,I am still immature to divinity that can burn my fingers.I gave my mother my most innocent and helpless look.

"Useless!!Can sit at home and eat well only!!cant do....". Okies, you got it. And rest you know.I just made sure that no one was around to hear this.

I wiped off the oil slyly in my dupatta(the obvious reason that there were no rags nearby) and bent down to the floor to worship when...drat!!..all the contents in my bag promptly fell out making the loudest possible noise.Mom did her eye exercise again while i did my own of looking somewhere else other than at her.

We moved inside the temple.Temples are always fascinating. They give you an aura of something powerful which goes beyond my capability of explanation.I made two wishes and hoped someone would ring the bell after the two wishes. The place was crowded that people rang the bell every 30 seconds and I began to do the vice -versa of making wishes when the bell rang(Sometimes human beings can be desperate).Suddenly the lights went off. Bad luck i thought:(. But it wasn't. God looked magnificent among the lamps.I have never seen a spectacular view before.The priest was doing the pooja and the granny next to me was cribbing about everything around. Eventually, I was smiling, concentrating and listening to the priest.

When the darshan was done, we began to move slowly outside the temple.I often wonder how it happens to me. Like Mr.Bean jokes where you know what is going to happen next, I tripped over the floor and landed smoothly on the granny.

"Aiyooooooooooooo.......narayana......aiyooooooooooooo...pathu po matiya??"(Cant you see while walking?). I looked sheepishly. I could have done that "Pathu"(see) part if there were lights. I said hundred sorrys, bent down to see if she was hurt. When I realised that she was fussing over nothing, I side stepped and moved out of the place.

I was glad when I moved outside in the cool air. My sister came out with her big grin stuck onto her face. I didnt look at mom and my dad gave no reaction. The floor was burning hot when we walked around the temple and so, sister and me were dancing all over the place.

We settled in a cool place in the veranda like thing when I saw the granny again. I tried to hide myself behind my sister. "Shall we buy muruku?", sis asked. I was glad to escape the granny and ran to the prasad stand.

The dark knight...

2009-03-21T22:49:00.000-07:00

I took a sly look in his direction. He was still there. The same place and stood waiting.I made no sudden movements.

I took a step forward like I was checking out hot coal-cautious .I could hear my heart pumping. He stood still and relished the fact that his victim was intimidated.I tried showing no emotions but every time he tilted his head, sweat trickled from my brow. I took a long breathe and moved forward very slowly.

I clutched my bag so tight that it drew new lines on my palm.The pain went unnoticed. It wasnt as bothersome as him. I took another look, this time, a full view.

I wondered how I didnt see him in the first place. I took notice only when i felt the leaves rustle behind me. I felt foolish. I felt lost. I moved slowly again. Even though I didnt face him, I still could feel his sight behind me. I made a silent prayer. My mouth waiting to cry out loud any time.

My vision of the path in front seemed dazed. I was not concentrating. I just followed my heels. I didnt know where I was escaping to.

Life is not fair. God is biased. Why give some the powers to cause fear while others to just run.Was he was made to frighten me? Why me? He took his chance when I was alone. Did he dare when I was with others? He dare not. He knew his limits. There was no time to think rubbish, no time to lament, no time to wish. I needed to move out from the place-somehow and safe.

When every strategy I tried failed, I had no choice but to wish. Wish that someone came by or something happened to just frighten him off. But the morning was as silent as ever and this added to my fears. Why was he that cheap to choose the same girl over and over again? But then, it was him. It was in him to seek the weakest prey.

My eyes went watery but I didnt stop. Held my bag so tight. Now, I waited for him to do something. I was ready. I was brave.Or at least acted brave.

He tilt his dark head one more time. Spread out his wings and cried out loud.

The raven flew down the tree in my direction and I ran out of the place. Ran for my life.A great escape again from the bird,the dark knight.

Shatabdhi express..

2009-01-04T02:21:00.000-08:00

I cursed everything.The pavement I walked on, the large number of turns, the security at the gate, the lady who checked my bag, the gate outside which was small, the auto driver, the station and everything. Yes, everything except myself.

I had to catch a train at 2:20 and I was still in the campus at 1:35.I was late and blame it again on Amir Khan and his Ghajini movie.The auto driver was a superman in disguise; I reached the station at 2:10.

I took a look at my watch (and also my mobile) and tried to open the door of the train.

"Eh eh eh..".It didn't open. After giving a stern look at the door ,I turned around. There were couple of foreigners and a small guy looked at me amused. My first reaction was to frown but I remembered all the ethical stuff done for three weeks at my work place that made me smile at him.

"We have are here for more than an hour.They open the door only at 2 : 20". He explained or that is what I understood from his accented English.

"Oh okies,thank you",I replied feeling very foolish and moved on acting like I wanted to buy a water bottle.There were no bottles available near by, but I loitered around.

The train door opened exactly at 2:20 and I was the first one in the train. It was a window seat and after settling, I just looked at the crowd passing by.In another few minutes, all seats beside me were filled. The train started and I started messaging .

An hour passed and when I had absolutely nothing to do, I opened my book to study.

"Are you a student?"

Suddenly waking up from immerse scrutinizing of numbers, I looked at my neighbour.

"No no,I am working.I am taking up an exam for higher studies", I replied.

"What exam and course?Is it for....", asked the lady next to him.

"Wow.How did you know?", I asked

"My husband is from that college", she pointed at a guy who was asleep in the next seat."He told me that you might be studying for the exam".

I closed the book. This was becoming a big issue and I was doing nothing worth it.The next thing I wanted was a take on my scores which was beyond predictability.

Food arrived.Juice, biscuits and also a water bottle. I tried opening the bottle and spilt water.

Then all of us started talking. Everything in general-about travel, food, culture,general perspective and so on.

The second round of food arrived and it excited me :D . If you are a foodie,you would know. Now, it was some samosa and sandwiches.Plate clean again.

I felt a little drowsy and slept with the ear phones still plugged into my ears. Typical Indian. Food, sleep and chat.

"What do you want to become?" ,the lady asked.

Huh?

Ok, Here I am calling myself a "software" engineer and she is asking me what I want to become?

"Thin" was the response that ran in my head but if blurted then, the whole train would have rocked laughing.

"I don't know. Probably an HR."I knew the next question.

"Why?"

"Why" is the hardest question ever. Easy to ask but difficult to answer.Why ask why every time?

I smiled sheepishly and said "I think it suits me."

"Oh, technically.Did you do a research on it??"

Eh..now whats that?? "No, I havent looked into it. I am just fascinated. A blind passion is what you can call it. I think I would suit better. In simple terms, after all confusions and mix, this is something I have decided by myself", I replied without breathe.

"That is very pleasant to hear. You think you will not stagnate anytime?", she asked again.

Where is this leading.Grr...

The dinner arrived and I was grateful. I think I thanked Laloo Prasad Yadav also.

She didnt stop.She was waiting for an answer.

"I will not. Probably will make it exciting.Please dont ask how.I haven't found out how".

She smiled and we ate in silence.

Silence is mystery. It occasionally leads to introspection. I began one too. Why is that I am stubborn on something? Is it passion? Is it for dignity purposes?

Then we began to speak on general topic. The guy next to me was a doctor. He gave insights on the medical field. The husband gave tips for the exam. We reached destination at 10 p.m.

I pulled out my bag and like every typical Indian stood up to rush out first.

Out of curiosity, I asked her, "What are you doing?"

She smiled and replied " I am an HR".

I was startled and said "Oh!Thats great!!"

"Subhashree, you will make a good HR"

I was speechless. I was glad. I was shocked. I was nervous. I stood frozen.

A compliment. A hope. A word that made difference.

I smiled,didn't thank her(or forgot you can say) and got down the train. "Hopefully, someday, hopefully", I whispered.

"HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.........." , my sister greeted and I grinned. Took a last look at her, waved and left the place.

Why is that a compliment from someone unknown makes me so happy ?Is it the compliment? I didnt undersatnd.I dont think I ever will.

The week that was..(infy experience)

2008-12-26T04:00:00.000-08:00

This is just my first week experience at Infosys training centre Mysore. There is no criticism or comparison. Simple incidents that followed during the week.

I ran my hand into the cover frantically. Bull!Where is my offer letter? My mother frowned at my carelessness and the security guard showed signs of restlessness.

Day 1, 7 p.m. at Infosys gate

Shivers ran down my spine- fear or anticipation or just the weather, I couldn't find out.Ah!my offer letter,photo proof were identified and only I was allowed through the gate due to security measures. My sister was disappointed. I dragged the suitcase by the wheel.The sound echoed through the whole campus. “Okies!”, I looked at the suitcase “this is not working”. I ended up carrying it to the vehicle. I took a glance before I got into the vehicle and fell in love with the place in an instant. Inside the cab, I realized I was the only one in salwar and only one from south. In two minutes, we landed in front of the reception (which gave a 3 star effect) where I had to open all my bags for inspection and get keys to the room. I,being number crazy, looked at the building and room number first .”Good sign”. All our bags were again loaded into another vehicle and we were driven to our blocks.My room was in the ground floor.

Knock ! knock!.No reply. Knock knock!No reply.Little irritated and was about to knock again when I noticed the switch for bell.Argh!

As soon as the door opened, I gave the blank look that I was famous for. So did the person in the room. My roommate!!I have never stayed outside (excluding camps,friends place et al) and she was my first ever roomie. I said a hi,shook hands, placed my luggage and left the room in two minutes (probably shocked her).

I called up one of my best friends who has been there for several months.

"Come to FC 1",he said.

Here I am-a poor soul who has no sense of direction and he expects me to come to some place that sounded like a Morse code.

"What is that? More important, Where is that?"

He handed over the phone to his friend which proved to be of no effect too. So, I walked to the place asking directions in every ten steps.

Oh!!FC 1 meant food court one!!

The place was amazing and even more delighting was the menu. I have never seen so much variety in my life. While eating, besti tried to explain every building which I tried even harder to grasp.

After looking at my monotonous nod,he decided to show the place rather.

We first went to the GEC (global education centre) which beat White house hands down (not that I have seen the white house but you do get the point ,right?)

I gaped at the ceiling design. "id cardu............................%$^&&*%%&*&%?" (the words are censored because I didnt understand a word of what the security said.It was their native language). I realized I didnt have a ID card and tried in my best of tamil + hindi + english words to explain that I had checked in only then.The security was courteous enough to let me in.

I was gaping even at the classrooms and also made mental note of the last row hoping I would land there someday.I was introduced to some students who were very busy studying.It kind of scared me.

View of my building

We left to the respective rooms(again I did my ten step asking thing) and I got to know more of my roomie and also the room. My roomie was (and is ) very sweet and patient enough to put up with me.The room had excellent facilities which promised to make me more lazy.I partially unpacked and hit bed.

Day 2

After experimenting things at the bathroom(which was equally big like the room), I ran to meet my college mates the very next day.We went in search of something called the "Mutliplex". It took me fifteen minutes to realise what I was seeing-a theatre!! I think I had the most innovative and craziest opinion about the place.I found it delicious!!After submitting some documents and collecting coloured tags(some tried exchanging tag colours but when "ethical issues " were discussed,everyone returned them).The interiors reminded me of my favourite theatre here and I did a twenty minutes scanning of the crowd. It was colourful and diversified.If you consider yourself young and in the right mind,you would know what I mean. The induction programme was exciting because every time volunteers were called for,some twenty hands shot up. I ,typical observer (or thats what I call myself), just enjoyed listening and watching the whole thing.

It was during the lunch time that I discovered what harm an ID card could do. The card had tasted the sambar and rasam.Some formal checking and filling forms were done and we left for the day.

At dinner time, my besti suggested cycling back to the rooms. It was only after that did I realise the number of muscles I had in my legs.The whole place has slopes and cycling along these proved the most difficult part.My heart beat faster and I grasped for air every now and then (thanks to six months of sitting at home and lazing).

The delicious multiplex

Day 3

The longest day of the week where all formalities started only after 6 p.m. We filled forms of bank account,service agreement and so on. By the time it ended,I could sign a paper even in my sleep.The class was half exciting and half boring. I almost slept through the second half of the session.

The most happening thing of the day was the DJ night.I couldnt find company to the dinner and went alone when I heard loud music. The place was flashy and adrenaline pumping(ok, I made it sound like car racing but that is how it was).The ambience was full of energy and people dancing their heads off. Around 150 people crowded in 150 metre space. Here, I found all my classmates and we didnt risk dancing and spoiling the amphi theatre (that is what it is called though it didnt resemble anything to that of roman architecture). i stayed there for a long time and decided to shake a leg some day.

The DJ night

Day 4

The induction this day was awesome. Handled by two ladies, I enjoyed every bit of it. A large number of role plays and total entertainment.

In the evening we went to Laundromat (or simply Laundry) and waited for whole one and half hours for the clothes to get washed.

After this, we went roaming about the place and were still excited about everything.

The campus had every sport you could think of- basket ball,hockey, cricket,football, race track,volley ball, tennis, badminton, table tennis. You name it ,they have it.

Basket Ball

The Origami building with the race track

Day 5

We wrote some English test and the classes got over in few hours. I tried my hand at TT (was decent I guess). The whole of my college gang went to FC5 which was another architectural amazement and food was excellent too.

Food court 5

We had the weekend off and I returned home.

The things that I noticed during the week:

1) Being in the campus tames you. They dont compel rules on you but you tend to listen because of the peer group.

2) In the evening or free hours,you are allowed to try out any weird combination of dressing.Nobody bothers, nobody cares.

3) There are too many opportunities but no time.

4) The nights are the busiest time of the day (esp at GEC)

5) You eat a lot yet manage to lose weight ;)

6) The facilities make you even lazier than what you were at home

All in all, Mysore campus is one brilliant place with lot to learn and enjoy.

P.S.; My friends challenged me-if I say the same after two months of stay;there could be two possibilities. Either I got admissions for higher studies and have planned to leave in between the training or I am simply insane.

Brick Bats

2008-12-11T22:16:00.000-08:00

I am in love with the smileys :) They are adorable and convey a lot if you analyse them closely.When someone sends across a smiley,you always imagine the "expression" the person gives.It is like "a picture conveys thousand words". It is also an indication for ending a conversation.A couple of straight smileys means that the other person is bugged or bored and it ends right there. Adding to all that facts, smileys are even cuter than the real facial expressions :D!! *grin grin*

The reason I use lot of smileys . It is simple. I exploited , I used them in every text message and most of my mails,chats and blogs.

All was well until I read a mail in which some researchers from some country in some lab decided to make a research on the smileys:(.Are people that jobless? According to them,people who use smileys frequently are considered flirtatious and want attention all the time.

I may not know who I am but at least to some extent, whom I am not (confusing? that is the whole point).I ignored the research as baseless and useless.

The problem started.It was like this;every time I used a smiley,I had second thoughts.However I tried to ignore,the mailed flashed before my eyes. To add to my woes, my sister also mentioned reading something on the same lines somewhere. That is when I started using lot of *cough cough*,*grin grin* and *ahem ahem* s.

In spite of all this,I simply couldn't stop using smileys but I often wonder if all this is what is called human psychology. Why ponder into things that are unnecessary and followed by large mass. Consider people start researching about eating habits and claim if a person gulps food in a go ,he is considered intelligent??!!

Sigh!!However hard we try to ignore all the "research based " issues,it lingers in our minds whenever we perform the act.

Curses curses!! :( :( :(

P.S. ; I named the post as "brick bats" because I liked it.Hope some researcher in Iceland hasn't got any problems with it.Hello!!Haven't they got their "entire country devolving" problem to solve??

Missing Musing

2008-12-05T05:54:00.000-08:00

"Something was missing", I said, poking the slice of pizza for the hundredth time which could have thrown a couple of swear words provided it had a mouth. "Hmmm..something..."

"Whats the problem with the movie?It was good!!" , said my friend without even glancing at me.

It was late afternoon and my friend,sister and I were just back from watching the latest tamil flick "Vaarnam Aiyaram".The movie portrayed the role of a father in the life of a son-deliberately sentimental and over dosage of romance and after sympathising with each other and by tradition we were at the hotel(Incase you are wondering what the tradition is-it is always hotel after movie).

The actor surya was fabulous(err..i am not praising his looks or his physique).He brought out the difference between different roles-school boy,youth,army guy and old father.The entire credit to him.In spite of all this,I felt something was missing in the movie.Something that was blocked in my head and was stubborn to show up.

"I think there was no chemistry between Sameera and surya",my sister offered.

"Hmmm..No..not that.Something was wrong in the father son relationship and I cant find out what", I replied grabbing the pizza with my hands abandoning the manners of eating it with knife and fork.The knife simply didn't cut the pizza.

"Nah!!You are tasteless!!The relationship seemed perfect.He did the two roles very well", my friend opposed."Maybe...

She stopped when the waiter placed a huge bowl of block forest ice cream on the table. All of us reached out for the ice cream.

"Some parts seemed missing.Guess initially it was a long movie.", sister claimed as she placed the tips for the waiter.

"Maybe,in the movie,dad smoked too much while son didn't?" ,I said suddenly when we were in the bus. Both of them gave such a look that i took to my heels and wandered to buy the ticket from the conductor.

"Will you stop giving that "I-am-thinking" look??Its scary!!", yelled my sister when we got down.

"You dont understand.It is like a jig saw puzzle-everything in place expect a single piece and I have no clue where or how to place it"

"Dialogue!!", yapped my friend and both of them clapped.

Even all that insult didnt stop me from wondering and thinking about it again and again.Both of them didn't understand that my head would split into two if I didnt find it. Was the father role too much??-no.Was the son too good?-no. Was the daughter given no role?-apparently yes but that wasnt the missing part.Something was missing..missing..missing..

"Will you forget it??Please!!",my sister pleaded as we were outside our place.

"Hmmmm..."

Dad opened the door.

"Appa,you are here?We thought you were in the office.",I said, quite shocked.

"Oh!!Where did you girls go?!? !Movie?!?! What time was the show?!?Why are you both so late?? Cant you call if you knew you were going to be late",he yelled at top pf his voice,took a deep breathe "Listen, you still havent gone to the bank!!It closes by 5!!Was the movie so important??Cant you both prioritize things in life??

My sister looked at him with her best "I-am-sorry" expression. I smiled.Now I knew what was missing in the movie.

Understanding inflation the historic way;)

2008-11-16T05:05:00.000-08:00

THE PLAN

The map of Kurukshetra lay open on the table. The only source of light in the room was from the zero watt bulb that was swinging slightly over the five heads that were pondering over the map.

“This”, Arjuna moved forward “is going to be the venue for the war”. He circled the place with his fingers.

“Hmmm..That is Harayana. Is the place affordable?” asked Bhima scratching his chin. “The price of land is high”.

“That is very true, but Nakulan and Sahadev have agreed to part their money for this purpose”.

“Why only them? Why not all of us?” asked Draupadi with an accusation tone. She was clad in simple salwar kameez .Draupadi was the only wife of the Pandavas or “Kissi Se Kam Nahi Hum Paanch(KKNHP)” as they call themselves which is an adaptation and an idea inspired from the Ekta Kapoor serials. It was not meant to be Polyandry but done out of desperate measures as the Shaadi.com showed Draupadi to be highly paid in an IT industry and each of them could not afford to waste money on the marriage halls and food individually.

But all the excellent planning backfired as IT industry was not doing good leaving the entire family to worry on the basic necessity.

“Because they are the only ones in the medical field and it is the only profession that seems to be least affected by the recession”, explained Arjuna. Nakulan and Sahadev nodded in agreement.

“Is this war really necessary?” asked the wise Yudhistra.

“Of course!! If we do well, that is slap well, Lait Modi has agreed to take us for the next IPL with Deepika Padukone as our promoter and Cheerleaders from France.” said Bhima.

“Really??”,asked Yudhistra innocently.

“Duh no!!I was just kidding. The war is just for dignity purposes and I am very sure that the Kauravas are in same dilemma as us. We are just 5 in number but them?!! Even the 99 couldn’t afford an eye operation for their father. It’s a national crisis.”

“Let’s quit this Kurukshetra place and call for a war at the beach”, put forth Draupadi.

“Brilliant idea!!” exclaimed Yudhistra ,It is almost priceless and we can buy Bhajjis for lunch and dinner.”

“Lunch and dinner??” Sahadev moved forward to get a better look at Yudhistra, “How long is this war? Not just a day?”

“Hmmm..true.Lets not have it for 18 days. Let us make it just one day. Ok, finally the place is at the beach and the war is for a day. That is decided then.”

“Will they agree on all that?” offered Sahadev

“They would definitely agree with all the terms. The understanding is mutual. I am hungry. What is for lunch now? I smell Biriyani”

“Biriyani?? Are you out of your mind? Do you have any clue about the prices of vegetables and cereals?! , yelled Draupadi and the Pandavas acted like they were busy looking at the map.

“These men have no clue about what is happening around…..” Draupadi left the room grumbling to herself.

“Now for the arms and facilities needed. How many swords do we need? Do we need to recruit any more people or manage the whole thing ourselves?”, asked Arjuna as he jotted down everything that was being discussed.

“Oh oh..swords of steel?? Highly impossible”,said Yudhihstra. “And don’t worry about their strength. I heard that 50% of them have shifted to UK for work. Another 20% are very desperate to do their higher in some foreign country. 10 % are under fed and cannot fight and another 10% have gone to negotiate the nuke deal. That is only 10% who are left or just 10 people and I think we can very well manage them.”

“Drat!! Karna is with them”,said Bhima.

“So what?”

“Don’t you realize he has the Kavacha Kundala of gold? Just imagine the amount of gold he has!! And considering the gold prices now, it is a bumper prize.”,moaned Bhima.

“Is it possible to drag him to our side? We can lure him.Tell him that we have quotas for positions in the war and make him chief of army”, offered Nakulan.

“Chief of army with just 5 of us here?! I don’t think that is necessary. He is a generous guy, so, would have parted away money for everyone’s education. His gold won’t be a great threat to us”.

“High prices and low income is getting on our nerves. There must be some way to fight this war, otherwise we wont go down in history as the great Pandavas but as the people who fought the inflation.”

Everyone agreed with Arjuna.

“Arjuna,I think it is high time you dismissed your chauffeur Krishna.We cant afford to have him anymore.We cant afford the car in the first place. The amount I paid for the petrol and Krishna for last two years is four times the value of the car.” explained Sakadhev.

“Oh!!I will miss my sarathy . If I sell my car,how do we go to the war? It would be pathetic if we walked.”

“No worries.I am planning to get the Nano car.”, assured Nakula.

The occupants of the room smiled at each other.The room was silent again.

Everyone was startled when Yudishtra suddenly stood from his chair.

“Hey!!I have an idea.An idea how this war can be fought.And here it is………………’

“Great idea Yudhi!!Well done!!Somebody pass on your mobile please.I will tell this to Kauravas.They are bound to agree”,said Arjuna excitedly.

Each looked away.

“No balance” said Nakulan.“Validity over” said Sahadev.”I left it in my room” said Yudhistra.

“Chill Chill!!I have Virgin mobile.You can have mine”.Bhima passed on his mobile and Arjuna explained the plan to Duryodhana.

D DAY

14,410!! Come on Arjuna!!You can do better than that!!

“Oh my god!! Karna is on 15,820!!”

“Arjuna!!the left key.. the left key!!ahhhh…fast fast”

The war happened.Yes,it happened.Not on real ground but on Orkut online games.

The price of the war –internet charges were to be paid by the losing team.