Saturday, May 22, 2010

Yehaan kya ho raha hai?

My respects to the Victoria ji. Hell no! Not the queen of England but my eighth standard Hindi teacher who involuntarily threatened me to learn the Hindi language by failing me hundred times. Without her, where would I be? Lost in the green paths of ICFAI campus and joining the leagues of monkeys amongst the mango trees. My attempt with the language may be pathetic but with appropriate signals and little of dumb-charades , the message is delivered. With the message acknowledgement comes a question- are you a localite? I am glad to be recognised as "one of the south Indians" but when everyone finds out; from watchman to class lecturer, it does make me check my dressing sense more than once. One of the elites clad in salwar kameez and smiling lustfully at the thick curd that is given away in the mess does put me in the appropriate category.
My Hindi reached heights when I did frame a proper sentence with what I learnt in my eighth standard.
"First floor ka (or ki, I don't know) Kidiki kula hai"?
One of the assistants of the warden gave me a look like I had vomited on her face.
I tried again
"Uper bathroom ka kidiki kula hai?"
Like my Accounting subject staff said, 'Be clear in context when it comes a lay man.' A woman in my case :D.
She gave me the same look and I was thinking of another rephrase when she suddenly pounced on me to declare that she does not know Hindi.
Cool! I was in a greater dilemma. I need to learn the native language now.
Telugu here is totally different from what my 'golti' friends spoke. I am surprised that I was fooled by the fact that I thought I knew Telugu. So, I had to manage with mix of English and Hindi.
Adding to language hazards, I am also one of the abnormal ones to roam about the campus alone. I get looks like 'maybe a wierdo' but I must say I do enjoy certain privileges of judging people. It is not like I don't want to make friends but I am taking my own time.
Subjects on the other hand are driving me crazy. Here is a manager in the making who cant differentiate between asset and liability and especially when they are supposed to equated. When I asked my neighbour , she explained so much that put me to shame and I went on looking down at the book and acted like I was solving a very particular crisis in our country. I was double embarrassed in another incident when I interacted with my study partner only to discover that he was 'at least' three years younger to me certifying me as an 'aunty' to them .Adding to the owes, he claimed 'hamari group mei sab meri batch se hain'. It gave me a headache and I slept for 12 hours straight.
Left with very little choices,I am planning to visit the city tomorrow with people of my own age group ( My best buddy since school days) and watch a movie at IMAX. To help me wash away all the sorrows .

Friday, May 21, 2010

Week that was - 'B' School

My first week at B school and I havent a single soul who speaks my native language :'(
I shuttle from class to room
I lose way to mess and everywhere
I am lost in accounting class
I understand nothing of statistics either
Now, you wonder why am I here?
I wonder the same.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

A dedication

A dedication by Gayathri to me :) . Thanks a lot girl . God bless you :)

Hi Subs..

Jus wanted to write a mail to u in remembrance of “Our Friendship”. I am not as Good as u in writing. This is directly from my heart.


For all those lovely times u gave..

For all those silly talks we had..

For all those gossips..

For times we spent doin nothing and roamin.

For bringin me back.

Loved those moment and cherish them till end.

Happy to be ur friend.

Sad to say Bye L.

Hope and wish our friendship continues as now!!!!

Our friendship will always be cherished in my heart.

I use these words only to my close one

Now happy to add you in that list subs.

I LOVE U(in proper sense ;-) )


Take care Subs!!


Gayathri Rajendran.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

14th of May- My last post at Infosys Forum :'(

The sky is orange, solitary I am here,
Oh waves! Minster of the ocean,
Carving everything on your way,
Utter the things I want you to say,
Men have come and gone,
So have their wise sayings,
You have witnessed them all,
Hence, it is your memoir now,
Teach me life, tell me words,
Caution I say, I dislike advises.
He roared with virtue,
Came with the words,
“Whatever I tell you, my child”,
“Is worthy of my experiences”

(1) Jealousy is a feeling; a basic human character. You are not a saint and so you are allowed to vent that emotion. You would feel jealous if your boy friend / girl friend praised another person or even when your own sibling is appreciated. The jealousy can be materialistic too. It is not wrong to feel jealous about something but concealing it is maturity. Don’t let jealousy get better of you.

(2) Love can teach you many things; sacrifice and selflessness. It can teach you patience and make magical things around you. But what ‘love’ can’t teach you is to ‘un-love’. Whenever broken in a relationship, move on even if it is hard. It will teach you more sacrifice, selflessness, patience and everything becomes less magical and more practical.

(3) If you looked at the mirror and want to describe yourself, you will see half your life was influenced. No, don’t blame yourself for that. Our society has been framed that way. Even when you are totally independent and plan to go out of country, you are still expected to inform someone at home.

(4)Friends are asset. I am not sure if they are your alter egos or life lines but they define who you are now. They help you grow and better yourself. Few ones stay but ones who just passed your life teach you a lot. Friends who stay give you support whatever may be the situation. Both kinds of friendship are very necessary. Don’t shrug off friendship; every person has something to teach you.

(5)Brooding is a way of venting; a passage to relieve the heaviness in the heart. Sometimes you brood about everything and anything and, sadly, to everyone and anyone. What you must understand is that when you brood to a person, remember, you need have open ears when the other person broods to you too.

(6)Everyone has regrets in life and they flash every time we are low. For instance, you might have regretted being in so-and-so college. If you look at where you are now and introspect, being in that college wouldn’t seem very significant. What I tell you is that, you will not be able to forgive yourself in your entire life if there was an opportunity in front of you and you still ignored it. Those are the greatest regrets in life. Regrets are not with what you did in life but what you didn’t.

(7)Attention is something that attracts everyone like magnet. You tend to like the person who attends to you. The more that affection showered more the liking towards the person. With affection comes expectation which can be calculated as more the affection, more the expectation. There is nothing wrong in fulfilling the expectation but too much of fulfillment would lead to adhesive closeness. At one point of time, you may wonder if you are the person who is leading your life.

(8)Work on your strengths and never be ashamed of it. Reach out your strength to everyone and you will be surprised to see how many people enjoy your work. Talents are gifts and you can afford to spend time over them. Also understand that there is no one who can advertise you other than yourself.

(9)Be practical enough to understand that you can’t be Shahrukh Khan and have fans following you. Leave that to destiny but what you can do is respect people who respect you. Be respectful enough not to intrude into other person’s privacy. No one is perfect; you are part of that ‘no one’ too.

(10) Foolish those who say forgive and forget. If you can’t forget something that someone has done to you, it is equivalent that you haven’t forgiven them. The only thing you had to is to ignore that the thing happened. We are not Buddha but we are human being.

(11) Don't ask a question you never want to answer. Don’t advise things you never want to hear. Don’t utter words that you never can take it. Don’t justify anything to someone you love. All that was given somehow comes back to you.

(12) Compromise isn’t a negative word always. There are some things you never want to compromise; your goals and ambitions but most of the others can be compromised. Understand, we don’t live just for ourselves.

(13) Lastly, nothing waits for you. Neither time nor love. Life can’t be perfect. Making the best out of the imperfection is what you must do. Only your shadow follows you.
It came to an end, the way of life,
He made a great halt and I bowed,
“The mighty old king of sea,
You teach me more than I need”
The sun hid himself leaving thee to thyself

Monday, May 10, 2010


Statutory warning : Boring post

The baby slept in bliss in her mother’s arms. Her lips were red and cheeks pink.
‘Most beautiful baby’, claimed her mother warming the baby.
‘Madam, the gas agency people are here. We will get our cylinder today’, informed the maid intervening the happy couple.
This made them happier.
‘Cylinder!! Wow wow! How long have we been waiting for one!! This child is very lucky for us!!’ shouted the father in joy “And to remember this occasion, we will christen her Cylinderella!!”

Mother dies. Don’t ask how because it is not important but what is that father marries again. Like in most south Indian serials, father has no role to play after this. He gets drunk, beaten and flees to marry another lady. I know that is a pathetic exit but no other reason would justify his disappearance.

So, our poor Cylinderella is put up with her step mother and two step sisters in a medium sized thatched roof. I retain the step sisters’ gender because I want no controversies. Now, don’t pounce on me to ask if two females can’t cause any controversies.

Cylindrella grew up to be a beautiful 18 year old girl. Err..why not 16? If 16, the ministry of women and child development could come barging into my place for what Cylinderella is going to be portrayed as. She was much more beautiful than any of her sisters which is kind of obvious for a protagonist but needs a mention.

Everyday she had to work like a slave from making the idlis in the morning to washing clothes at night. Life was very miserable for her and she sat near the gas stove everyday talking to her dog which replied back ‘bow! bow!’ meaning cheer up! By the way, I hate CATs :D.

The sisters, including Cylinderella, eyed the neighbour boy named Ezhavarasan , nicknamed ‘Prince’. Prince went to a school that was considered posh in their locality. Yes, he was still in school because he failed twice. Every morning, he took his blue cycle and rode off to school. The sisters deliberately sat in the veranda to watch him go while Cylinderella peeped from the kitchen.

It was once that he showed off by performing a stunt and broke his front two teeth. That became his mark of heroism and hence the sex appeal.

One day, Prince was throwing a party because he passed his twelfth standard. His house was decorated in ribbons, banners and banana plantain. Everyone was invited including the step sisters. They assumed that Cylindrella was not invited and asked her scrub the floor and put kolam in the front. Her step sisters dressed in blue and red half sarees and the flowers in the head could make anyone faint. In literal sense.

When they left for the party, she cried alone and suddenly an old lady with wings appeared.
“Who are you?”, she asked looking amazed. The old ladie’s mouth was red because of paan and she smiled a toothless smile .
“I am mother fairy”, she said
“Mother? you mean grandmother?”, Cylinderella asked.
“How dare you?!!”, shouted fairy pointing a old stick at Cylinderella’s nose. “Maybe, olay ageing cream doesn’t work on fairies and works only on Sushmith sen”.

“Don’t worry fairy. But why are you here?”, asked Cylindrella.
“Don’t you know how the story goes? Do you read books or not?!”, growled grandmother fairy.

“Oh! Wait! I will bring the pumpkin”. Cylinderella ran to the kitchen and brought in the biggest pumpkin she could find.
Grandmother fairy prayed, raised her wand and swoosh!!
Voila!! Pumpkin halwa was steaming hot in front of them.

“What is this?!!”, Cylinderella asked quite annoyed.
“What else do you expect me to make out of this pumpkin? This is one of my favourites, you know”, replied fairy examining her wand.
“But fairy, I want to go to prince’s party and I don’t have a transport or decent dress to wear”, Cylinderella explained.

Sheesh! What kind of female are you? Steal one of your sister’s dresses and walk to his place. He is your neighbour, incase you forgot”.

Cylinderella was thankful for the idea and grabbed on a dress and wore her best. She wore matching clips on her head and examined herself in the mirror. She looked beautiful. She thanked the grand mother fairy.

“Just a warning, be back by 9”, advised the fairy.
“Because I go blind after that. So, make sure you come by 9”.

Cylinderella agreed and went to the party.

Prince was amazed to see a new girl . It was rare sight to see girls with good sense of dressing in the hall. So, he danced with her. All night, he pulled up his dhothi and did kuthu dance. Cylindrella giggled and enjoyed herself.

The clock stroke 9 and Cylinderella took on to her heels. Prince kept calling out to her but she didn’t turn back. One of the clips dropped near the door and prince picked it.

Next day , both, Prince and Cylindrella were sad. Prince was determined to find the new girl and so, he took the clip and tried it on every girl’s head. It was not a great feat as only very very few of them were good looking. He tried it on the step sisters and it fitted one of them perfectly.
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh..Princeeee…”, cried one of the sisters with dreamy eyes.

Hello ! wait! This is not how the story ends!

Prince fought his way to the kitchen where Cylindrella had been waiting for him and he put the clip on her head.

“I always knew it was you”, said Prince
“Is it?”, gleamed Cylindrella
“Who else in our neighbourhood uses jasmine oil on their head? The clip smelt of jasmine”

With teary eyes , she hugged him. They married and lived happily ever after.


During their first child:

“She is so beautiful”, said Cylindrella hugging the baby.
“Yes, she is”, said prince.

“Sir, LIC agency has come”, said the maid servant.
“Wow!! After so many days!! She is very lucky for us. Let us christen her Lickella!!”

“That sounds bad”
“Ya! I know. Let us name her something else”

And it continues…

Yawned? I warned you.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

The war

“The skies saved us last time. Lord had shown mercy”, General Lysander thought looking at the calm blue cloudless sky. “Let my folks men not starve”, he prayed as he examined his fellow Spartans working.

The ship cut through the waves ferociously leaving behind enormous delicate white foam. Each battle of Spartans against the Athens told a different story; of destruction and starvation. The wars were savage, brutal and with verge of enmity. Nobody was evil in a war; the war as such was evil enticing people to do their worst.

Spartan’s last battle was a near death experience and they had to flee. They had lost 70 ships and most of the crew men were stranded. Mercy was shown when the weather turned sour and Athens could not attack them.General had heard that Athens had turned against their naval commanders executing six of them without a second thought. War makes anyone either a hero or a murderer.“My men and I are not heartless”, he thought, “a situation makes us so”.

They had to fight again; defeat or victory was not in their hands but they had to believe. They had to end what they had started.Standing tall at the end of the ship, dressed in golden armour that reflected the sunlight, general looked like a king. He knew battles are fought and won not with man power but intellectual. And he was gifted with it in surplus. He had befriended Cyrus and his strength grew in manifolds.

Everything had a convergence and when that was destroyed, half the battle could be considered victory. He was going to attack Hellensport which was the grain area of the Athens. Poverty and starvation would be the result but choice was minimal.

“Είναι έτοιμη με δυνάμεις* ” .The highest officer in command acknowledged it.‘

Men fight to experience death; to find what hunger is all about’, he thought as he wore his war clothes and shield. Everyone was working as if they were leading the army.

The uneventful journey continued for 7 nights but their spirit was not dampened.

The ships hit the shore on the eighth day. In an enemy land, it was danger that waited but today only silence did. The crew moved in groups and cautious with each step. The dawn was to break in few minutes while the crew waited behind the cliff till they could see each other’s face.

He, commander of Athens, strode towards the sea with such arrogance and majestic justifying the position he held. ‘Everyone walks like that in his land’, thought Lysander, ‘only to find that it may not belong to him the next day’. He was followed by two of the fellow citizens; malnutritioned and completely ignored. They carried his clothes and armour. The sword was hung around his hip. ‘Careful person’, noted Lysander.

Lysander had to start as his men waited for him. With a short prayer on his lips , he strode forward looking only at the commander. He bellowed to bring in the fury in him. He had to take back what belonged truly to them.

Lysander was impressed with the way Athenian commander drew out the sword almost immediately. The commander was on his heels and stood waiting for him. In his last step, Lysander jumped and the swords of the two enemies met to write a history.Lysander was blinded by anger and the only thing he sought out for was revenge. He could not see what was beyond that. With every acquaintance of the sword, power was less but the belief was more. Athenian commander was an animal and fought with power and no brain.Lysander was hurt physically, only physically but strength within him grew. His men still waited for their leader to finish the commander. With one stroke that came suddenly and accurate, he beheaded the Athenian commander.He raised his sword that had glistened in the light but now covered with blood.

With fury, he shouted “πολέμου μόνο άρχισε “. War just began.

* be ready with forces

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Maapillai, mami and filter kaapi

“Hello madam!”, Sriram’s voice sounded husky over the phone.
“Her name is Meena and she is a 2009 pass out”, I replied back curtly.
“What??!”, he asked, genuinely confused.
“You usually call when a new girl enters our ODC, so I assumed…..”, I was grinning sheepishly.
He was amused and I knew this was going to be the news of the day. By lunch, it would reach faster than our Indi café services. Who in the right mind said girls conveyed messages faster?
“PM came to my cubicle now. He asked me if I was ok with travelling abroad”, he explained yawning. Guess, trying to show off like it is not a big deal.
Hmmmm..that doesn’t convey anything”.
“I know. Was just updating you. Okies, I am going for coffee. Catch you later”. He hung up.
I was wondering if Sriram had a chance of an onsite opportunity. The competition in the team was very tough and everyone had visas.
As I was wondering about this, suddenly everyone started clapping; including Venkat who all this while was sitting glued the PC.
“A tribute to Subha’s intelligence!! She gives valuable information even without being asked”,shouted Sriram raising his hand as a sign of triumph.
“You have any clue why you are clapping?”, I asked Venkat.
“No!”, he replied even without looking in my direction and started clapping with such vigour that his spectacles fell on the ground. I slumped into my chair. ‘I under-estimated Sriram’.

4 days later,

I was adjusting my bangle when ‘plonk!’ someone hit my head. I turned to see Sriram dressed in light blue shervani and worst, looking very comfortable unlike me, who was clad in the most colourful saree that even Jyothika dared to advertise. “You look beautiful!”, he said and colouremerged on my cheeks. Even before I could acknowledge his compliment, I heard my sister say thanks. Sriram gave his award winning grin looking at her and colour returned on my cheeks-blood red fury and embarrassment.
Rammmmm…!!”, his mother called out from the other side of the marriage hall and our hero rolled his eyes . She was dressed grander than the bride and strode with such an elegance that added more ‘grandness’ to the silk saree. The sound of mirudhangam seemed to complement the scene and was like the background music.
Sasi aunty is looking for you. She says she wants to meet you. She saw you when you were just 5 and it has been a very long time”.
Sriram didn’t say anything and searched for Sasi aunty in the crowd. His mom turned towards me scanning from top to bottom.
“Did Ram tell you about his onsite offer?”, she asked like it wasa general knowledge question.
“What onsite?”, I asked perplexed and looked at him. He just shrugged his shoulders.
“You don’t know va?”, she questioned like I didn’t what came after A in the English alphabet. “Ram is going to US in few weeks. His Visa is under process”.
I was annoyed that I didn’t know and made sure not tell him anything in future. “He just told me that his PM asked if he was willing to travel outside country”
“Yes ..yes!! that only”, she said. “It means he will go to US soon. His clients are in Houston . So,my son is going there pretty soon.
“What?! Oh..but..I mean..his PM just asked”.
Aunty glared at me and deferred her look for some time. “You are just jealous that both of you joined company at the same time and he is the one going”, she plainly accused and left the place before I could say something.
“Don’t give me that look. I am not responsible for that”, he gave an innocent look.

Sasi aunty came in with full enthusiasm. There was so much rose powder on her face that could paint the whole marriage hall pink. Her daughter trotted behind her and she could paint the guest rooms.
Ramuuu!! You have grown so much!! And how thin you have become!! Don’t you eat well??”
I noticed Sriram tuck in his belly as she said that.
“I heard you were going to US. Nice ! All my brothers and their sons are there only. You can ask any help from them .”
Sriram just smiled as she went on with her blabbing.
“Hey, meet Shruthi. She will be finishing college this year. She wants to go to US too!”.She held her daughter’s hand like it was made of diamonds.
Sriram was as astounded as I was at the statement and I was enjoying this.
“She knows to cook and sing”, she went on while I was imagining just that – Shruthi singing while cooking and feeding Sriram like in Tamil movies. I laughed. A bit loud, I guess.
Sasi aunty gave me that disgusted look again. I wondered what it was with women and their expressions. It seemed to come with the age.“Who is she?”, she asked looking at me. If looks could kill, I would have been dead then.
“My colleague, aunty, and she is related to the guy’s side”, Sriram explained.
“I have heard many of these corporate stories! Marrying their own colleague! What a disgusting thing! You better be careful Ramu. My daughter is not like them”, she said in a proud tone.
I took a deep breath as she left the place.
“Are you not too young?”, I asked.
He gave a blank expression.
“For marriage?”, I asked again.
He just laughed . “It is like the movie ticket. Advance booking , you see”.
“Crap!”, I retorted back.
“You are just jealous!”, he claimed giving an expression just as his mother did.

An hour later,

Hey Sri! Why is that I have a feeling that all your family folks are staring at me?”
“Cough cough..actually they are.”, he said looking somewhere else.
“What??! Why??”
“Because I told them that I was in love with you and going to marry you”, he explained while fumbling with his dress.
I stood frozen in the place and found my head spinning . “That is an indecent proposal!!”, I screamed.
“Hey, my would-be shouldn’t shout at me like that”, he said.
“Idiot! You are committed to someone else. Dont you realize that?”, I screamed again.
“So what?”, he asked. “That can be sorted out later. This is for time being”.
“Time being?? What do you mean? Wait wait! Is it because you didn’t want to be caught with the rose powder? Escaping from Sasi aunty, is it?”
Sriram smiled agreeing to every word.
“You are completely out of your mind ! Seriously! “, I said laughing at his expression and admiring his knack of managing the situation. “Your mother would have been hysterical!”
“Ya ya! She actually didn’t like it either”
“So what did you tell her?”, I asked out of curiosity.
“I just asked her one thing- Subhashree or Vellakari?”, he said in a low voice.
I laughed loud.

Sasi aunty came to us with her ‘looks could kill’ expression.
“Ram! You are just like others. All spoilt and bad. Marrying your own colleague……”.
She was stopped by Sriram’s mothers who came to save me. I didn’t know what to say.
“What Sasi are you talking? My daughter in law is going to IIM next year”, she said adjusting her saree.
IIM..who?”, I looked around, “me?”
Sriram’s mother put her finger on the lips and I became quiet. Sasi aunty looked at three of us and left the place.
“I am going to IIM?? I am just giving CAT this year!!”, I explained with pauses.
“Yes ..yes!! that only”, she said. “It means you will go to IIM soon.”
Sriram laughed his head off while his mother looked at him like she was looking at an extinct species in a zoo.
I pulled up my saree slightly and ran for my life!

Saturday, May 1, 2010


In our lifetime, some people involuntarily (or voluntarily) become the outcast. No, not in the literal terms of the caste driven community of ours but the way we just shrug away some people for them not being like us.

Since our petty school days to the days of cubicle, we have simply disregarded one type of genre- the nerds. In our native language-the pazhams, thaiyar sadams and so on. As I say the word 'nerd' , a bi-spectacle hyper tension figure with lean long hands and running nose is what comes to my mind. Apparently, thanks to cartoon network for portraying them that way. I remember from my school days; we looked at the first benchers as if they had just swallowed a giant squid and ran the opposite direction. They were never considered our type and spoke a language, like an esoteric group, which was few physics and chemistry words strung together. They had a special aura around them that made you feel very small for the knowledge and you begin to curse the creator for giving you minuscule amount of brain when compared to them. Thus, the distance between two extreme species of same clan was vast.

Theory of cyclic human nature is prevalent .If a person had looks,he had no brains and vice verse. The combination of both was deathly fatal and can be major 'axe' effect. Nerds were never known for looks. To be precise, they were never looked at twice. Buried behind books and laptops, you remember their hairstyle more than anything. It was obvious, they never had time to talk and never had time for girls. Lets say, they did meet a girl who supposedly should have been his partner in lab or a neighbour who borrowed all his notes, the conversation starter would be " Have you looked at the kerbs cycle?" or "In which region does the crystal oscillator work?" making the woman take on her heels and ending the conversation even before it started.

It was not because they did know what to talk to woman but the question was "how". The girl who they have spoken to and moved around first would eventually become their other half later in their lives. They could handle the world's sophisticated code and use the latest technology like breeze but never figure what to say to the fairer sex.

Time goes on and they keep making friends by helping others. The reason they are never forgotten and always liked but never admitted in a gang.

The universal truth is going to be catastrophe- everyone admires a nerd . Even if they are the most ridiculed person, they have always managed to be the centre of attraction ; be it at the international conference of worldly knowledge or the among the ragging seniors in the hostel rooms. They have always been soft natured who spoke very less and low and attached many 'thank you', 'please' and 'thanks for your time'. This is why most of them grow to become what is known to as perfect gentlemen.

Like a pupae to butterfly is how I would describe their looks to be. Considering the fact that we never looked at them when they were young, we wonder what an amazing person they have become as they have grown up. With extravagant knowledge and sophisticated speech, we , girls begin to enjoy their follies and call it 'cute!'. They begin to impress us without a slightest effort; natural charmers I say.

In all, nerd turns out to be a dude you always have known and loved.

Dedicated to all the nerdy guys I have known :) Perfect gentlemen :)