Maapillai, mami and filter kaapi

“Hello madam!”, Sriram’s voice sounded husky over the phone.
“Her name is Meena and she is a 2009 pass out”, I replied back curtly.
“What??!”, he asked, genuinely confused.
“You usually call when a new girl enters our ODC, so I assumed…..”, I was grinning sheepishly.
He was amused and I knew this was going to be the news of the day. By lunch, it would reach faster than our Indi café services. Who in the right mind said girls conveyed messages faster?
“PM came to my cubicle now. He asked me if I was ok with travelling abroad”, he explained yawning. Guess, trying to show off like it is not a big deal.
“Hmmmm..that doesn’t convey anything”.
“I know. Was just updating you. Okies, I am going for coffee. Catch you later”. He hung up.
I was wondering if Sriram had a chance of an onsite opportunity. The competition in the team was very tough and everyone had visas.
As I was wondering about this, suddenly everyone started clapping; including Venkat who all this while was sitting glued the PC.
“A tribute to Subha’s intelligence!! She gives valuable information even without being asked”,shouted Sriram raising his hand as a sign of triumph.
“You have any clue why you are clapping?”, I asked Venkat.
“No!”, he replied even without looking in my direction and started clapping with such vigour that his spectacles fell on the ground. I slumped into my chair. ‘I under-estimated Sriram’.

4 days later,

I was adjusting my bangle when ‘plonk!’ someone hit my head. I turned to see Sriram dressed in light blue shervani and worst, looking very comfortable unlike me, who was clad in the most colourful saree that even Jyothika dared to advertise. “You look beautiful!”, he said and colouremerged on my cheeks. Even before I could acknowledge his compliment, I heard my sister say thanks. Sriram gave his award winning grin looking at her and colour returned on my cheeks-blood red fury and embarrassment.
“Rammmmm…!!”, his mother called out from the other side of the marriage hall and our hero rolled his eyes . She was dressed grander than the bride and strode with such an elegance that added more ‘grandness’ to the silk saree. The sound of mirudhangam seemed to complement the scene and was like the background music.
“Sasi aunty is looking for you. She says she wants to meet you. She saw you when you were just 5 and it has been a very long time”.
Sriram didn’t say anything and searched for Sasi aunty in the crowd. His mom turned towards me scanning from top to bottom.
“Did Ram tell you about his onsite offer?”, she asked like it wasa general knowledge question.
“What onsite?”, I asked perplexed and looked at him. He just shrugged his shoulders.
“You don’t know va?”, she questioned like I didn’t what came after A in the English alphabet. “Ram is going to US in few weeks. His Visa is under process”.
I was annoyed that I didn’t know and made sure not tell him anything in future. “He just told me that his PM asked if he was willing to travel outside country”
“Yes ..yes!! that only”, she said. “It means he will go to US soon. His clients are in Houston . So,my son is going there pretty soon.
“What?! Oh..but..I mean..his PM just asked”.
Aunty glared at me and deferred her look for some time. “You are just jealous that both of you joined company at the same time and he is the one going”, she plainly accused and left the place before I could say something.
“Don’t give me that look. I am not responsible for that”, he gave an innocent look.

Sasi aunty came in with full enthusiasm. There was so much rose powder on her face that could paint the whole marriage hall pink. Her daughter trotted behind her and she could paint the guest rooms.
“Ramuuu!! You have grown so much!! And how thin you have become!! Don’t you eat well??”
I noticed Sriram tuck in his belly as she said that.
“I heard you were going to US. Nice ! All my brothers and their sons are there only. You can ask any help from them .”
Sriram just smiled as she went on with her blabbing.
“Hey, meet Shruthi. She will be finishing college this year. She wants to go to US too!”.She held her daughter’s hand like it was made of diamonds.
Sriram was as astounded as I was at the statement and I was enjoying this.
“She knows to cook and sing”, she went on while I was imagining just that – Shruthi singing while cooking and feeding Sriram like in Tamil movies. I laughed. A bit loud, I guess.
Sasi aunty gave me that disgusted look again. I wondered what it was with women and their expressions. It seemed to come with the age.“Who is she?”, she asked looking at me. If looks could kill, I would have been dead then.
“My colleague, aunty, and she is related to the guy’s side”, Sriram explained.
“I have heard many of these corporate stories! Marrying their own colleague! What a disgusting thing! You better be careful Ramu. My daughter is not like them”, she said in a proud tone.
I took a deep breath as she left the place.
“Are you not too young?”, I asked.
He gave a blank expression.
“For marriage?”, I asked again.
He just laughed . “It is like the movie ticket. Advance booking , you see”.
“Crap!”, I retorted back.
“You are just jealous!”, he claimed giving an expression just as his mother did.

An hour later,

“Hey Sri! Why is that I have a feeling that all your family folks are staring at me?”
“Cough cough..actually they are.”, he said looking somewhere else.
“What??! Why??”
“Because I told them that I was in love with you and going to marry you”, he explained while fumbling with his dress.
I stood frozen in the place and found my head spinning . “That is an indecent proposal!!”, I screamed.
“Hey, my would-be shouldn’t shout at me like that”, he said.
“Idiot! You are committed to someone else. Dont you realize that?”, I screamed again.
“So what?”, he asked. “That can be sorted out later. This is for time being”.
“Time being?? What do you mean? Wait wait! Is it because you didn’t want to be caught with the rose powder? Escaping from Sasi aunty, is it?”
Sriram smiled agreeing to every word.
“You are completely out of your mind ! Seriously! “, I said laughing at his expression and admiring his knack of managing the situation. “Your mother would have been hysterical!”
“Ya ya! She actually didn’t like it either”
“So what did you tell her?”, I asked out of curiosity.
“I just asked her one thing- Subhashree or Vellakari?”, he said in a low voice.
I laughed loud.

Sasi aunty came to us with her ‘looks could kill’ expression.
“Ram! You are just like others. All spoilt and bad. Marrying your own colleague……”.
She was stopped by Sriram’s mothers who came to save me. I didn’t know what to say.
“What Sasi are you talking? My daughter in law is going to IIM next year”, she said adjusting her saree.
“IIM..who?”, I looked around, “me?..how?..”
Sriram’s mother put her finger on the lips and I became quiet. Sasi aunty looked at three of us and left the place.
“I am going to IIM?? I am just giving CAT this year!!”, I explained with pauses.
“Yes ..yes!! that only”, she said. “It means you will go to IIM soon.”
Sriram laughed his head off while his mother looked at him like she was looking at an extinct species in a zoo.
I pulled up my saree slightly and ran for my life!

Nerd-->dude!

In our lifetime, some people involuntarily (or voluntarily) become the outcast. No, not in the literal terms of the caste driven community of ours but the way we just shrug away some people for them not being like us.

Since our petty school days to the days of cubicle, we have simply disregarded one type of genre- the nerds. In our native language-the pazhams, thaiyar sadams and so on. As I say the word 'nerd' , a bi-spectacle hyper tension figure with lean long hands and running nose is what comes to my mind. Apparently, thanks to cartoon network for portraying them that way. I remember from my school days; we looked at the first benchers as if they had just swallowed a giant squid and ran the opposite direction. They were never considered our type and spoke a language, like an esoteric group, which was few physics and chemistry words strung together. They had a special aura around them that made you feel very small for the knowledge and you begin to curse the creator for giving you minuscule amount of brain when compared to them. Thus, the distance between two extreme species of same clan was vast.

Theory of cyclic human nature is prevalent .If a person had looks,he had no brains and vice verse. The combination of both was deathly fatal and can be major 'axe' effect. Nerds were never known for looks. To be precise, they were never looked at twice. Buried behind books and laptops, you remember their hairstyle more than anything. It was obvious, they never had time to talk and never had time for girls. Lets say, they did meet a girl who supposedly should have been his partner in lab or a neighbour who borrowed all his notes, the conversation starter would be " Have you looked at the kerbs cycle?" or "In which region does the crystal oscillator work?" making the woman take on her heels and ending the conversation even before it started.

It was not because they did know what to talk to woman but the question was "how". The girl who they have spoken to and moved around first would eventually become their other half later in their lives. They could handle the world's sophisticated code and use the latest technology like breeze but never figure what to say to the fairer sex.

Time goes on and they keep making friends by helping others. The reason they are never forgotten and always liked but never admitted in a gang.

The universal truth is going to be catastrophe- everyone admires a nerd . Even if they are the most ridiculed person, they have always managed to be the centre of attraction ; be it at the international conference of worldly knowledge or the among the ragging seniors in the hostel rooms. They have always been soft natured who spoke very less and low and attached many 'thank you', 'please' and 'thanks for your time'. This is why most of them grow to become what is known to as perfect gentlemen.

Like a pupae to butterfly is how I would describe their looks to be. Considering the fact that we never looked at them when they were young, we wonder what an amazing person they have become as they have grown up. With extravagant knowledge and sophisticated speech, we , girls begin to enjoy their follies and call it 'cute!'. They begin to impress us without a slightest effort; natural charmers I say.

In all, nerd turns out to be a dude you always have known and loved.

Dedicated to all the nerdy guys I have known :) Perfect gentlemen :)

Price to pay

Olivia opened the carton of orange juice which was one of things she did every morning. Nothing energized her like the sour tingling taste of the fruit. She settled on the chair which was just few feet away from the bed. She smiled at Nathan’s innocent face that was in deep slumber oblivious to the admiration. She wondered how this sweet cute face could cheat on his wife. Nathan was married for three years to Meghna ; a well read engineer from Bangalore. They had known each other in the office and were engaged a year after their acquaintance. One year after their marriage, things went wary and the couple fought every night. This led Nathan to visit the city night clubs and bars and it was during one such occasion that he had met Olivia.
Olivia was just irresistible. With a slim figure that seemed straight out of Victoria’s model agency and independency that attracted most men. She never had a permanent job and never felt the need for it. Every night she frequented the bars and moved with rich men. Nathan was not her type; the reason she was attracted to him. It was one night when Nathan drank away his grief and sorrow in a corner where she met him by accident. On one look, she could tell that he was couple of years younger than her. Nathan was dressed in business suit and seemed to be out of place. She started a conversation which she had never done with anyone else and Nathan just vented out. She was not listening completely; she was admiring his innocent face and the voice that choked between sentences. He was drunk foolishly and she had to help him. She almost carried him to her room and the fateful night became a routine.

Meghna dried her hands in the saree pallu. She was mentally frozen and carried out the chores mostly out of habit. The work in the office took away most of her energy but gave the satisfaction. Also, it distracted her from thinking of what her husband was doing. Meghna was aware of where Nathan went every night although he excused himself with office work. When she first heard about it, she didn’t believe it. As a matter of fact, she didn’t want to believe it; until she had followed him one night. She had seen Nathan go into a bar. She didn’t mind his drinking habits but when she saw him intimate with another female, she just flared up. She moved out of the bar and never spoke to him after that. Nathan did not seem to mind and the distance between them grew more.
Meghna knew they were never going to be together again and decided to file a divorce against him. She was quite sure Nathan would approve of the same. Fate had a mind of its own. It was on the way to the lawyer that she fainted at the lawyer’s office and was taken to a local hospital where the doctors declared that she was pregnant.
Meghna was caught in a dilemma ; she wanted a child and at the same time end it with Nathan. She felt he had cheated her and put her in the situation in which was caught now. The fury grew and it was mixed with sadness. She had never felt more hurt in her life. She wanted to end it all.

Nathan snored gently and changed his position. Olivia sighed and moved to empty the glass in the sink. She wanted to sit there all day watching him but he had to go home. He had to do go to his “first” home where his so-called “other half” lived. Olivia settled next to him on bed and ran her fingers through his hair. He groaned and grumbled something. She shook him gently like she was waking a kid. He suddenly opened his eyes and grinned at her. He took a glance at his watch and sighed. He had to go home now and get ready for office. He got up lazily, kissed Olivia and made his way to the bathroom. Olivia lay on the bed for another fifteen minutes. She missed him already.

Meghna stared at the contents of the bottle that was clutched in her hands. The online search had confirmed an instant death when taken whole at a time. She knew she couldn’t do it and he didn’t deserve this but the evil side of her said he deserved the pain; the pain he had given her. This would be for her child. She didn’t want her child to know what his father was like. Her hands trembled and she poured the contents into the upma she had prepared for him. She was lost in her thoughts.

Olivia stood on the porch as she saw Nathan drive. It was still dark outside and he always left very early to avoid other people recognizing him. She had a mild headache and decided to sleep as there was nothing much to do. She craved for Nathan and had let him know many times. She wanted to marry him which was so unusual of her nature. She never approved of marriages but he had made her weak. She wanted him forever. She wanted him to divorce Meghna and marry her. She was going to persuade him somehow. But for now, she wanted to get rid of the headache.
Meghna watched Nathan eat his favourite upma. Not a word was spoken. This time, Meghna found the silence too obvious. She kind of choked at what she was doing. Nathan didn’t leave a peck on the plate. “It tastes too good”, he told her.
It was sudden for Meghna and she found all the energy draining out. There was guilt and sadness that seemed to fight each other. She told herself that she had committed a grave mistake. Nathan had even smiled when he said that .An unknown bond existed between them even though no words were spoken. The love had not faded. Her hands shivered. She reached out for the telephone. Nathan collapsed near the wash basin.
4 hours later, at City hospital
Meghna watched her husband from outside the ICU. Doctors had just told her that he was poisoned and she tried to give a genuine expression of being shocked. She was very glad that her husband was better. She knew she could never forgive herself if he had died. She needed to talk to him. She waited for him to get better and out of the hospital.

Olivia looked like she was in deep sleep. In fact, endless sleep. One of the police men felt her pulse and confirmed their doubts. The milk man had come early morning and found that the lady of the house was not willing to open the door. He sensed something wrong when the mobile phone was ringing continuously. He called out for the neighbours.
The headlines next day informed the death of a middle aged lady in her apartment. The story went on to explain that she seemed to have been poisoned and it was mixed with the orange juice that she had consumed early morning. The police suspected a murder and wondered who could have poisoned a lady who lived all alone.

Forgotten Milestone

It was 1940, 2nd of May in France and the temperature outside was mild. The atmosphere inside the small wooden army cabin that was stationed at the border was the same .Lieutenant Colonel Rafe licked his lips. He bent upon a brown tattered map of France that contained the intricate routes. Smoke from cigar disturbed his view; the smoker was Colonel Pervez. Man of large frame in his late forties with well trimmed moustache, just smiled. “Nothing tastes like these cigars, not even woman’s lipstick”, he claimed. On the contrary, Rafe was thin and pale with stern quick eyes that seemed to follow every detail. Officers feared Pervez’s brawn while they were admired Rafe’s intellect.

“I fear the number of our men we have sent to confront in this sector”, Rafe pointed out to his senior. Pervez gave a sad look as if departing from his cigar meant his death. “You worry too much, dear Lieutenant. Forty is not a small number for the place. Germans would never take that route as the terrain is not very convenient”.

Rafe was not convinced because Pervez was prone to make mistakes and ‘convenience’ was never in an army dictionary. He studied the map carefully and looked for signs of danger. Had he not been busy with other sectors, he would have checked the troop that was sent.

“If German’s enter through the mainline, we can attack them from all the three ends but if they take this route, we would lose all forty men”, Rafe claimed, more to himself. “Losing forty men is not a big deal, Rafe, especially in an enemy confront. It is natural.”, Pervez said his usual lethargic tone. Being a man of practicality, Rafe knew it was true but that was not what they were assigned to do-lose men foolishly. Planning was never easy; it was semi barbaric and sentimental at the same time. Most of the men who came into army had families.

“Did you take a look at the troop at least?”, Rafe questioned Pervez. “Yes yes. Inspected last night .All good and patriotic”, claimed Pervez. Rafe knew it was not true. The bottles of alcohol stacked in the corner spoke of a different story. “Why do you worry about them so much?”, asked Pervez. Rafe was provoked but he maintained his calm. “Men come to serve our country and they have families! Don’t you realize that? They shouldn’t lose their lives just because their seniors committed a grave mistake of not looking over things. Their life is our responsibilty”. Pervez rolled his eyes and seemed not bothered. The concept of family never appealed him. He was quite content with all the women he went out with frequently but never fell in love with any of them. According to him, men in armies did not need families, just as Rafe and he had chosen not to marry. Rafe, because he respected them and had decided to marry the one he loved. To fall in love was not possible for a man in his position.

A muffled sound came over the receiver that was placed in the far end of the cabin. Rafe moved towards it to adjust so that it can capture the signal. The cabin creaked as Rafe made movements. “Colonel Colonel! Do you read me?” The voice broke over the receiver.
“This is Lieutenant here. What is it, officer?”, Rafe replied recognizing the voice of the officer.

The signal was strong and so the voice was very clear.
“The planning was wrong, Sir.German’s took the Route A.”, explained the officer, sounding quite alarmed and nervous.

Rafe froze in his place. It was anticipated but it seemed to answer his worst fears. “Officer, can we have the other two troops back to the area?”, asked Rafe as he had planned out.
“Yes Sir, we could but we lost all forty people who were supposed to tackle there. It was a brutal fight and much more than what we expected of them. Germans attacked from three ends. The enemy almost lost out too; with only few of them left out now. We can handle them. Our troop was very skilled but unfortunate”.

Rafe choked while Pervez just stared at the receiver. Rafe was disgusted with himself. Disgusted for trusting Pervez on this.
“Sir?”, officer called out.
“Yes, I am here”, answered Rafe.
“Didn’t you find it hard to send them to fight, Sir? Should have looked into it one more time. You could have been more careful about the number sent to such a dangerous zone”
Rafe was stunned by such an accusation and looked quite helpless. “Why do you say that , officer?”
“Were you not aware that all the forty people sent to fight were women?!?!”, officer asked in a stern voice.

Rafe simply stared at the receiver. He could feel Pervez’s hand trembling over his shoulders.

Next day, the head office received a resignation letter. It was signed by Lieutenant Colonel of French Sector-A army, Rafe Van.

Unusual II

I lie bruised, burnt ; my beloved,
Journey trancending endless.
I trace my steps to see the beginning,
It seems far beyond levels.
I trusted thyself to make the start,
Now, I trust thyself to end it all.

Appa and Subha - 3

Musings of dad and daughter

Me: What to do if you come across an "unreasonable" person ?
Dad: Ignore. Keep silent.
Me: What if they are mad? shout and throw tantrums?
Dad: hmmmm..
Me: It is very irritating. And I happen to meet one everyday
Dad: hmmmmm...
Me: Will you stop your hmmmm hmmm??? I am .......
(silence)

Me: Dad!!!Why are you silent?

Appa and Subha - 2

Musings of dad and daughter .

Me: "Can adversity strike twice in anyone's life? I am totally frustrated"

Dad:(not looking up from his newspaper) Well..it did in my life. I had your sister after you.