Back in randomness

I forgot why I used to write. I dont know where the motivation came from, who read it or what some of my posts even meant. I tried to remember. I vividly understand the surge in heartbeat when I wrote an article. Those non flickering anticipation that each word gave.

What happened to old me ?

What happened to my happiness?

I just saw that the blog was more than a decade old. This means, there are pages of desperation, inspiration and flow of emotions for 10 long years. My each writing would reflect my mood of the day.

Where did my power to dream go? Why am I accepting everything on way now?

Currently, I am a wreck. I am not happy, grateful or sincere. I am lost, devastated and nothing is clear to me. Things I believed in are now forgotten. I live in delusion of black tar. I am suffocating in it, and I cant see.

Would you believe if I told you I have been questioning everyone's happiness?

What makes people happy ?

I dont know. I dont know as much as I dont know what to do with myself. I am too egoistic to delve deeper, and ask the right questions. And I am too proud to talk to anyone.

That was when I realized why I wrote.

Was it my heart speaking?

It has always been easier to write. Like in a diary. I could have never been able to win a speech , but I could write. I have always been able to explain pain as much as I could experience it. It was easier, like breathing.

I am sure it didnt make sense to lot of people, but to me, it did. I knew what I was going through with each sentence.

Maybe, I should write more. Only my sister has been pushing me to write more. I should do it.

I never believed in my writing. It was just a farce. A joke.

But now, to save myself, I need to write. And believe in it.

The week that was..(infy experience)

This is just my first week experience at Infosys training centre Mysore. There is no criticism or  comparison. Simple incidents that followed during the week.

I ran my hand into the cover frantically. Bull!Where is my offer letter? My mother frowned at my carelessness and the security guard showed signs of restlessness. 

Day 1, 7 p.m. at Infosys gate

 

Shivers ran down my spine- fear or anticipation or just the weather, I couldn't find out.Ah!my offer letter,photo proof were identified and only I was allowed through the gate due to security measures. My sister was disappointed. I dragged the suitcase by the wheel.The sound echoed through the whole campus. “Okies!”, I looked at the suitcase “this is not working”. I ended up carrying it to the vehicle. I took a glance before I got into the vehicle and fell in love with the place in an instant. Inside the cab, I realized I was the only one in salwar and only one from south. In two minutes, we landed in front of the reception (which gave a 3 star effect) where I had to open all my bags for inspection and get keys to the room. I,being number crazy, looked at the building and room number first .”Good sign”. All our bags were again loaded into another vehicle and we were driven to our blocks.My room was in the ground floor.

Knock ! knock!.No reply. Knock knock!No reply.Little irritated and was about to knock again when I noticed the switch for bell.Argh!

As soon as the door opened, I gave the blank look that I was famous for. So did the person in the room. My roommate!!I have never stayed outside (excluding camps,friends place et al) and she was my first ever roomie. I said a hi,shook hands, placed my luggage and left the room in two minutes (probably shocked her).

I called up one of my best friends who has been there for several months.

"Come to FC 1",he said.

Here I am-a poor soul who has no sense of direction and he expects me to come to some place that sounded like a Morse code.

"What is that? More important, Where is that?"

He handed over the phone to his friend which proved to be of no effect too. So, I walked to the place asking directions in every ten steps. 

Oh!!FC 1 meant food court one!!

The place was amazing and even more delighting was the menu. I have never seen so much variety in my life. While eating, besti tried to explain every building which I tried even harder to grasp.

After looking at my monotonous nod,he decided to show the place rather.

We first went to the GEC (global education centre) which beat White house hands down (not that I have seen the white house but you do get the point ,right?)

I gaped at the ceiling design. "id cardu............................%$^&&*%%&*&%?" (the words are censored because I didnt understand a word of what the security said.It was their native language). I realized I didnt have a ID card and tried in my best of tamil + hindi + english words to explain that I had checked in only then.The security was courteous enough to let me in.

I was gaping even at the classrooms and also made mental note of the last row hoping I would land there someday.I was introduced to some students who were very busy studying.It kind of scared me.

View of my building

We left to the respective rooms(again I did my ten step asking thing) and I got to know more of my roomie and also the room. My roomie was (and is ) very sweet and patient enough to put up with me.The room had excellent facilities which promised to make me more lazy.I partially unpacked and hit bed.

Day 2

After experimenting things at the bathroom(which was equally big like the room), I ran to meet my college mates  the very next day.We went in search of something called the "Mutliplex". It took me fifteen minutes to realise what I was seeing-a theatre!! I think I had the most innovative and craziest opinion about the place.I found it delicious!!After submitting some documents and collecting coloured tags(some tried exchanging tag colours but when "ethical issues " were discussed,everyone returned them).The interiors reminded me of my favourite theatre here and I did a twenty minutes scanning of the crowd. It was colourful and diversified.If you consider yourself young and in the right mind,you would know what I mean. The induction programme was exciting because every time volunteers were called for,some twenty hands shot up. I ,typical observer (or thats what I call myself), just enjoyed listening and watching the whole thing. 

It was during the lunch time that I discovered what harm an ID card could do. The card had tasted the sambar and rasam.Some formal checking and filling forms were done and we left for the day.

At dinner time, my besti suggested cycling back to the rooms. It was only after that did I realise the number of muscles I had in my legs.The whole place has slopes and cycling along these proved the most difficult part.My heart beat faster and I grasped for air every now and then (thanks to six months of sitting at home and lazing).

The delicious multiplex

Day 3

The longest day of the week where all formalities started only after 6 p.m. We filled forms of bank account,service agreement and so on. By the time it ended,I could sign a paper even in my sleep.The class was half exciting and half boring. I almost slept through the second half of the session.

The most happening thing of the day was the DJ night.I couldnt find company to the dinner and went alone when I heard loud music. The place was flashy and adrenaline pumping(ok, I made it sound like car racing but that is how it was).The ambience was full of energy and people dancing their heads off. Around 150 people crowded in 150 metre space. Here, I found all my classmates and we didnt risk  dancing and spoiling the amphi theatre (that is what it is called though it didnt resemble anything to that of roman architecture). i stayed there for a long time and decided to shake a leg some day.

The DJ night

Day 4

The induction this day was awesome. Handled by two ladies, I enjoyed every bit of it. A large number of role plays and total entertainment.

In the evening we went to Laundromat (or simply Laundry) and waited for whole one and half hours for the clothes to get washed.

After this, we went roaming about the place and were still excited about everything.

The campus had every sport you could think of- basket ball,hockey, cricket,football, race track,volley ball, tennis, badminton, table tennis. You name it ,they have it.

Basket Ball

The Origami building with the race track

Day 5

We wrote some English test and the classes got over in few hours. I tried my hand at TT (was decent I guess). The whole of my college gang went to FC5 which was another architectural amazement and food was excellent too.

Food court 5

We had the weekend off and I returned home.

The things that I noticed during the week:

1) Being in the campus tames you. They dont compel rules on you but you tend to listen because of the peer group.

2) In the evening or free hours,you are allowed to try out any weird combination of dressing.Nobody bothers, nobody cares.

3) There are too many opportunities but no time.

4) The nights are the busiest time of the day (esp at GEC)

5) You eat a lot yet manage to lose weight ;)

6) The facilities make you even lazier than what you were at home

All in all, Mysore campus is one brilliant place with lot to learn and enjoy.

P.S.; My friends challenged me-if I say the same after two months of stay;there could be two possibilities. Either I got admissions for higher studies and have planned to leave in between the training or I am simply insane.

The last stand..

Lethargy can be a part of your life but sometimes it tends to set your life apart; even if it is your usual semester examination. There are times when you hate a subject which conveniently adds on to your woes. One such subject was computer architecture ,way back in third year.

CA classes were for activities like sleeping, dreaming, writing records under desk, chatting everything except listening. I am not even sure what the staff attempted to teach as I was stubborn not to listen. The internals don’t pose a threat because cramming in the answers the day before and during the long tiresome bus journey was more than enough to score decent. The questions were always predictable.

You realize that the time has flown only when the semester exams are around the corner. Perfect for get-together…ooops..I mean the effective combine studies. The CA exam was in another two days when my friend and I realized that we had done nothing.
If I were the VC of our university, I would make sure that the exams are never in May because the sun and books do their magic and make us sleep; even in the exam hall.

Big fat foreign author books are very good. They explain concepts clearly but strictly not recommended for people who study the day before the exam. After some desperate search for a local author book, we got only one copy and decided to share. We made our avowals and swore to do some serious study the next day and worked on a plan.

Our study strategy’s first step was to invite two more people to help us. My sister and another friend were chosen. The pathetic part was that my sister was in eleventh and the friend was doing medicine!!They seemed much more focussed than we were. The problem was one book and 4 people.Trrrrrr…the book was torn into four sections-chapter 1 & 2 with me and rest distributed among others.Chapters are always framed this way-first easy,second long but doable,third and fourth hard, and fifth..I am not sure.I have never reached till there in any semester.The two tables in my room were occupied by sister and me and friends made themselves comfortable on the bed.My Engineering friend slept more than she read.The room was silent was 3 hours and the first to speak was my doctor friend(that’s how I am going to refer her ) who had read the entire chapter assigned and was ready to pour out whatever grasped ;much to our embarrassment.She did her best and we dealt the rest ourselves.In this way most of the syllabus was done.My sister was excited about the entire process and asked questions,to which we, obviously ,didn’t know the answers. Two of them left early while my engineering friend stayed till late night.The subject was done to satisfactory level.

The next day,after usual hustle-bustle in the corridor and last minute cramming, I entered the hall and prayed extra hard.I found that I wrote more than I had learnt but that is what I call tactics.Everyone described that paper as tough, so that left me in safe zone as the correction would be lenient. My friend too had done her best .During the time-gap between the exam and result,we promised that we would be more serious about exams and many other things (which we have never followed till date). We waited for the results anxiously which came out in another two months.

Much to out relief,we managed to scrap through!! My mother was shocked to see a ‘just pass’ but I gave my innocent ‘I –don’t-know- what-went-wrong’ look.She grumbled about something-the university or me I couldn’t hear.I rang up the other friend and told her the result and bribed my sister not to tell the inside story.

After all that was over,I made it a point to not to repeat this last minute study again as luck would not favour a person always.

Having read just four lines from my ‘entire’ Mobile Communication’s book, I was bugged and so began to write this article. By the way, the exam is in another 2 days.

Traumatic yet sympathetic(project experience)

Now, I feel like Einstein. Three months of 'so called' project in my core subject and it is done once for all. By mentioning Einstein, I wasn't referring to the brains or even the experiment but my hair has just turned out that way with ample sunshine everyday..he he.

It all began last year with HOD demanding that we find a sensible project in some good company. But the point is that the GOOD company had to take us!!But who listens??Like the intrepid and daring travellers, my friend and me first started searching for a project and almost begged for it towards the end(ok ok ,no details on that).As we are the future telecom engineers(with us as the engineers , I doubt if the telecom has any future?!?!),we started with the same industry i.e. AIRTEL,BSNL(they gave projects to both computer science and information technology students but not for ECE) and AIRCEL.All denied our requests by simply saying that the labs have tight security and allowing us would be dangerous.Poor things,they really didnt know our abilties.After telecom,our destinations were predictable-WIPRO,PANASONIC and BPCL.Each of them had their own excuses .After all that search,we became desperate because it was almost project period .Suddenly the idea of asking at the Chennai Port Trust hit us.But what has an Electronics engineer to do in a port?When we put forth the same question to our HOD,she simply said that our seniors had done projects there.That was enough and two almost exhausted nuts reached there the very next day.

The first day at the port was the most unforgettable. Hey, of course not in a good sense.What happened was that the bonafide from our college costs us (can you beat that??..yup,20 solid bucks for each bonafide) and we have a habit of submitting the xerox at all places.We did the same at the port.The director was so strict and he found out that is was not the original.The reaction-he flung it in the air!!And my friend did some gymnastics and caught it in mid air while I stood frozen staring at his face.I found myself shivering and was quite happy to see my friends hand trembling too.After certain initial blasts he finally allowed us to do a project there.However he warned us that the projects would be old and not very useful for average scorers (ya,the average scorers) but we agreed because we needed a company certificate.We were asked to meet his minions and the usual running around the place began.The only thing I don't like in Chennai is the sun and it was unusually scorching at that time(what at that time..cha..all the time) and we turned very much the darker shade.When we enquired about the title and the projects offered,they weren't good and one of the supervisors hinted that we could get help somewhere.That was it!!the next day we were in search of a project centre(ya,the same place where you almost get the project done).To be frank,it wasn't our laziness or languid nature but our aim was to complete our project successfully with an output.As recommended by our HOD,we hit a centre at Nandanam and chose the embedded field.

The tragic story part-two began here.I really don't know why but we had problems with everything-with coding,output,slides and enhancements.We hit the centre almost everyday either fighting them or simply what I call negotiating and occasionally gave attendance at the port to show our progress.Our guide at the port was very flexible and friendly.The certificate was assured.

But the problem at college did not end.HOD found our project too simple and demanded enhancement.Thanks to Jimmy Wales,Wikipedia is a boon.We searched the net for all possible enhancements (and occasionally sneaked into orkut..he he) and found one totally hilarious -something like a loud speaker.We got the entire circuit from one of the electronics sites.The HOD wasn’t all that impressed but it was the best we could find.

Hey!How could I forget the reviews?It was a classic performance-a big time comedy(well you guessed the jesters:)).We made everyone happy(ya ya,they laughed their heart’s content)-HOD,staffs and even our juniors(now,I am waiting for their turn:)) .We say something and they laugh.So,all the reviews went on this way(and I still wonder why we spent time on the slides when no one was interested).It was during the end of project that we found our enhancement not compatible and a big thanks goes to our classmate who pointed out that it wasn’t possible(Thank god that some technical guys do exist).It was as usual the last minute galata and we needed to get it done somehow.The solution was obvious-the ritche street(for people who aren’t aware of ritche street-it isn’t just a street but a long stretch of road at Chennai where absolutely any electronic gadget is available).

Here began our tragic story part three.When we got down from the bus,we didn’t know into which corner we turned but our heads and the corners began to spin at the same time.We went into every shop we could find but the IC wasn’t available.The enhancement idea was dropped(and we made a point to buy a couple of ear plugs for the reasons everyone can find out).

The project at the centre was done(with lot of persuasion and slogging) and when the kit were in our hands ,we felt like warrior princesses.With a smile stuck on to our faces, we proceeded to get the certificate at the port.That guy was a sweet heart. He simply looked at our project and was satisfied with our efforts and the certificate was issued within an hour.Now,for the report.All we had to do was fill pages with what we had done.More the pages ,more you have slogged-that was the general idea. After 7 semesters at our University ,that wasn’t going to be hard.After referring to many old reports, we finally got ours done.

We planned to take the print out at Kodabakkam-supposed to be cheap and fast .The grave mistake we did was to go there the day before our submission. I have seen queues at passport office, ration and even near water pumps but this was the first time I saw queue at all Xerox shops. ‘Wait for half an hour to one hour’ was the standard reply.We finally managed to get into(actually crammed into and considering my size, it was a bit comical) one of them.After time moved like snail,we got ours done. Though we both weren’t entirely satisfied ,didn’t mention that to each other. It was very late in the evening when we gave the print out for binding.I left the place earlier and my friend waited.We got only one book bound as the place was crowded.

The project is almost over and it looks like half the battle is won.The final review is yet to be done and think it wont be much of a problem(as always,saying is easy).

When we were doing the things and working, it seemed hectic and irascible but after all that is done, I think I enjoyed every moment. Hmmm…Life is that way:)